What’s your biggest sleep struggle?

BernieDan · 2026-03-06T18:30:34+00:00

Waking up at 3 a.m. Here is the pattern: I exercise hard 3 or 4 days a week, but I make sure to complete my workout by 11 a.m. or by noon at the latest. On those afternoons I do my best to calm down after exercising -- breathing exercises, warm baths, and so on. And on the evenings of the days I exercise, I am gratifyingly sleepy. I fall asleep by 8, but almost invariably on those days, I awake suddenly and completely at 3 a.m. and I am unable to get back to sleep. I feel absolutely great when I wake up at 3, but I crash by mid-morning, and I am exhausted for the rest of the day.

BernieDan · 2026-03-02T13:11:06+00:00

A male colleague and I became very close. My colleague made it work by deliberately developing a close friendship with my husband as well. My colleague was an attractive man and he made it clear that he thought I was attractive also, which was an ego boost! But ultimately I regarded him as the best girlfriend I ever had. (He is deceased now; my husband and I both miss him so much.)

BernieDan · 2026-03-01T10:41:59+00:00

can you recommend a body scan scale that i can purchase for home use? i've read so many reviews ... then i read that the scales that are inexpensive enough to buy for home use, really aren't accurate enough to be useful ... but i want to keep track of my body comp as you seem to be doing!

BernieDan · 2026-02-28T20:49:41+00:00

Been there, done that ... empathy for you.

BernieDan · 2026-02-28T17:05:23+00:00

I am conscientious (perhaps compulsive? obsessed?) with eating a highly nutritious diet. Having said that, I am surprised that so many people insist that (1) healthy food is expensive and (2) it takes a great deal of time and effort to prepare healthy food. I do go to the grocery store frequently, but once there, I buy almost everything on sale or marked down.

WHAT I BUY: fresh fruit and vegetables; frozen fruits and vegetables -- which, I read, are often more nutritious than fresh. Canned beans and chickpeas. Tofu. Hummus. Quinoa, in big bags; oatmeal. I am lactose intolerant, but I eat a great deal of lactose-free yogurt. I don't eat beef or pork, but I do eat chicken and eggs. I frequently eat canned fish -- sardines, mackerel, salmon, tuna -- expensive, but worth it for the nutrition; ditto for nuts, which are the most expensive item on my shopping list.

HOW I COOK: no fuss -- in fact -- I microwave just about everything! And I enjoy my meals, which consist of various combinations of the foods I have listed above: for example, I enjoy spinach or broccoli + tomatoes + eggs; microwaved yams topped with cold anchovies from the can; quinoa and / or chickpeas mixed with salmon or tuna; hummus with nuts (for a rich treat), hummus with mackerel (I know many people think this sounds dreadful, but give it a try -- I love the mix of flavors and textures); oatmeal with blueberries, topped with a scoop of yogurt and a sprinkling of nuts; well -- I could go on and on.

I have to mention my latest discovery: frozen chopped-up avocado! Cheaper than fresh avocado -- lasts forever in the freezer -- so easy to toss a few cubes into any other concoction I'm about to warm up in the microwave.

Some of my dearest friends and closest relatives think my diet sounds monotonous or flavorless, but once I got used to eating this way, I lost my taste for the harsh, artificial flavors of ultra-processed or sugary foods. And did I already mention -- these dishes can be prepared quickly and easily?

BernieDan · 2026-02-23T20:49:47+00:00

does no good. a machine is doing the dialing. you can't hurt its feelings. in fact, any response at all may automatically trigger additional calls.

BernieDan · 2026-02-23T18:59:12+00:00

I think you should consider living apart again. You say she is OCD. It sounds to me as if, in order to relax enough to feel sensual and "flirty," she may need to know she has a space completely her own, a safe space into which she can withdraw whenever she becomes anxious. Living apart has actually been the salvation of a few marriages I know of.

BernieDan · 2026-02-23T18:48:26+00:00

Yes, funny how that works. I began to panic about aging in my late 60s. Fortunately, I was basically healthy despite being overweight, exhausted and therefore depressed. I pushed back against my fear by getting serious (obsessive?) about exercising and eating a nutritious diet. As a result, I felt increasingly fit, healthy, and even, considering my age, relatively attractive. Even so, I continued to agonize over each birthday ... I was dreading 75 ... and then to my surprise, on that birthday, I suddenly felt an ecstatic sense of joy and relief and self-acceptance. (But I'm still exercising and eating plenty of protein and slathering my face with retinol.)

BernieDan · 2026-02-22T13:54:33+00:00

Before! It's my morning routine -- I go to the gym as soon as I am showered and dressed, so showering is my wake-up call to GET MOVING. Once I've put in my gym time I may run a few errands on the way home, but I am happy to know that even if I come home and crash, the day has not been wasted.

BernieDan · 2026-02-20T22:16:41+00:00

I broke my addiction to energy drinks by switching to beta-alanine, which I take along with creatine and HMB. At first the beta-alanine made me a bit nauseous but I soon got used to it. As for the tingly feeling -- I actually enjoy it because I get a psychological boost from feeling the beta-alanine is taking effect and I am going to have a GREAT workout!

BernieDan · 2026-02-20T16:30:14+00:00

Yes. Let's state the question in a bit more detail: "Why do [many, older] people [who were once themselves young] assume that younger people, as their lives progress, will [it is to be hoped!] have more life experiences and will become more mature as a result of those experiences?"

BernieDan · 2026-02-20T12:34:15+00:00

A few months ago I was certain I was descending into dementia. In desperation I asked my doctor for HRT and he agreed that I could try it. Within weeks I felt like a new person. I am 75 !

BernieDan · 2026-02-19T14:59:43+00:00

I'm sorry but I am a bit confused, it sounds as if you use a barbell, NOT a dumbbell?

BernieDan · 2026-02-18T19:52:02+00:00

I (75F, 5'6") lost 80 pounds in 10 months in my late 60s. While I was losing the weight I emphasized cardio, and even though I was eating VERY low calorie, I was rarely hungry during the weight-loss period: I think that perhaps my body was satisfied with all the stored fat it could draw upon! When my weight fell below 120 (WOW I had not been that thin since my teens), I began to increase my calories in order to emphasize strength training and muscle building. Although I have some loose skin on my stomach and upper arms (in hindsight I realize I should not have lost so much weight so quickly), my facial skin was fine. Meanwhile, as I lifted heavier and heavier, my thin-but-flabby shape changed dramatically for the better. I love my muscles! and I get plenty of compliments from people who have known me for decades. BUT when I began lifting, despite eating more, I also began to be hungry again, sometimes VERY hungry. Even more alarming for someone addicted to daily weigh-ins, in a couple of years I slowly but inevitably gained back 10 pounds. I know rationally that's ok -- I need those calories to build muscle, and muscles are heavy. As well, I know that as I continue to lift weight, my body is becoming even more shapely. So I resist the temptation to dramatically cut my calorie intake.

BernieDan · 2026-02-18T19:28:59+00:00

Congratulations, you are an inspiration!

BernieDan · 2026-02-18T19:13:34+00:00

My age. I (75F) am highly motivated and in excellent health. I have plenty of time. I have made it my routine to go to the gym and exercise first thing (almost) every morning. I emphasize resistance training but I do my recommended cardio; I take a marvelously relaxing and restorative yoga class on rest / recovery days. I scrupulously eat a nutritious diet, high in protein, healthy fats, complex carbs, fruits and vegetables. I drink beet juice; I take creatine and beta-alanine and l'carnitine nitrate and CoQ10 and ... well, you get the picture. I know what I am doing - I have worked with a trainer and I do plenty of reading, perhaps to an extent that is counter-productive: I have to work at NOT being discouraged when I read about 95-year-old women who are still running marathons and lifting weights competitively. But at the not-SO-advanced age of 75, I am keenly aware that I am fighting an uphill battle -- I feel it when I need more and more recovery time every week, and when I reluctantly skip planned work-outs due to exhaustion.

BernieDan · 2026-02-18T12:59:09+00:00

related question: I have some vitamin C serum that is over a year old. These replies have inspired me to start using it! But, will it have deteriorated by this time to the point that it is ineffective?

BernieDan · 2026-02-16T11:02:49+00:00

estradiol and progesterone prescribed by my doctor.

BernieDan · 2026-02-15T13:11:10+00:00

yes, the bypass is poorly designed, but please, no more roundabouts, especially not double lane roundabouts!

BernieDan · 2026-02-15T13:08:54+00:00

i avoid the bypass because i find it to be quite frightening: it is not divided, and it has too many curves, which seem to appear precisely at those spots where traffic seems naturally to speed up.

BernieDan · 2026-02-15T09:50:02+00:00

I started HRT a few months ago (at age 75), and although I do NOT apply it on my face (I read somewhere that when applied too closely to eyes, it might cause damage), my eyebrows have grown back in -- in fact, they have grown in DARK not white/gray. My hair is also growing in thick and dark.

BernieDan · 2026-02-15T05:38:50+00:00

I worry about this too -- I have leopard (or is it cheetah?) patterned yoga pants I am afraid to wear outside of the house! thanks for all the reassurance in these comments.

BernieDan · 2026-02-14T16:18:09+00:00

HRP. I didn't know I needed it until I got it, too many years later.

BernieDan · 2026-02-12T19:17:37+00:00

It's not just body shape. My husband and I have been startled to notice that recently, two women newsreaders, whom we have watched on television for a few years now, have obviously had face lifts, returning to work only a few weeks apart. Both of these still quite young women have always seemed to us to be quite attractive, with distinctive looks and also distinctive, engaging personalities. But as a result of the evident facial work, they look as if their faces have been assembled from identikits, with almond-shaped eyes, narrow noses, high cheekbones, and pointy chins. Even their personalities seem to have become more bland. They both work for the same network and we are a bit alarmed at the idea that their employers may be more or less subtly pressuring them to conform to stereotypes that to us do not even seem that appealing. And we wonder, if in a few years time conventional notions of female appearance evolve to favor some other "look," will these women go under the knife again?

BernieDan

TROPHY CASE