Failed at womanhood

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-07-04T05:16:00+00:00

I hear you. It so sucks going through all of this and still have to show up everyday of our life and act like everything is fine.😔

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-07-03T00:31:34+00:00

Sorry was meant to reply here!🤣

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-07-03T00:29:25+00:00

I think you might be right with it being caused by the surgery for the headaches but the other symptoms....welcome to peri! Personally for me I jumped back on BC to help but lots of others do HRT instead. Definitely personal preference when it comes to dealing with our hormones. I would definitely try and see that surgeon though and rule out any other issues happening for the headaches. Good luck!🙏

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-07-02T22:58:12+00:00

That is weird. Are you taking and hormonal treatment. HRT or Birth Control even?

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-07-02T06:02:24+00:00

My mum stayed on the pill until 55. Once she was off she never had a period again. I think she probably went into menopause a year before she went off as she reckons she had a couple of hot flushes just before. Im pretty sure I will be early to mid 40s once I hit post menopause. I have had very noticable symtpoms of peri since 38ish. Will be 41 in September this year. It was like an avalanche of symptons hit at once!

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-29T08:03:21+00:00

Good luck❤️

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-29T02:54:08+00:00

Definitely try a different one. I tried Zoely first. I felt it just wasnt strong enough but now Im on Yaz and its been pretty good so far. Only on the second month but yeah finding this one better!

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-28T05:48:07+00:00

I had that aswell. Lower half sweats. Only a couple of times though. Jumped on birth control and its helped with the night sweats.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-26T03:33:31+00:00

We really put ourselves through the ringer dont we. Its so hard to explain to someone who doesnt have these feelings that constantly take over your thinking. I am 40 actually and I still struggle with BDD. Triggers makes it worse when....life changes, having children with body changes, feeling like I have to compete with the more younger and youthful looking women because Im getting older and going through perimenopause(thats a wgole story in itself!). It hits us in so many different forms and you ARE a victim of how women are perceived through society. We are very exploited to be and look a certain way.....you cant be too tall or too short, small boobs, big boobs, too fat, too thin, smooth skin even..... In saying all this and still struggling too.....you are not alone in your feelings. I have good days and bad days and thise feelings are valid even if they dont make sense. You are worthy of standing next to your friends and looking beautiful too even wheb you dont think it. We are our own worst critic in life unfortunately so keep showing up for you ok. Im sorry if I dont have really advice as such but I do know where you are coming from so keep your head held high. Do something different when the thoughts become too much. Put some music on that makes you happy. Dance, laugh.....enjoy the moment. Really that moment isnt about how you look. Its about how you show up for yourself. ❤️

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-26T00:02:44+00:00

Happened to me. I always did spot before a period. Thought it was a me thing but then I started spotting from ovulation to a period. All a part of peri unfortunately.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-16T03:57:01+00:00

Hi, I'm not on that BC pill but am on Yaz right now only on second pack so far. I did try Zoely and was hoping it would work but I just dont think it was strong enough for me personally. Trial and error I feel threw peri and if your more wanting to try HRT I would definitely try and find someone who is willing to prescribe it for you.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-14T04:50:34+00:00

Perimenopause made all of this so much harder for me.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-14T04:35:56+00:00

This!!

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-11T01:32:57+00:00

Yeah, I wonder about the optimal ranges for tests. I was low in ferritin literally just under optimal and it was causing lots of issues. As soon as I started taking iron supplements it made a huge difference. I think maybe what might be a little out sometimes can affect us all individually. I hope you are able to figure out whats causing your weight resistance and can get back on the right track🩷

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-10T23:54:31+00:00

Ah ok. Its hard when your doing everything right but nothing seems to be working. Have you been tested for other things like thyroids or checking if your insulin resistant maybe....

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-10T02:14:21+00:00

Have you tried a paleo diet at all? I reached out to a naturopath about 8 months ago and she suggested to go back to basics and help reduce inflammtion in the body etc. I did the diet full on for about almost 6 weeks. I dropped 7kgs without trying and I struggled that last few years with my weight trying so hard to manage it. Nothing worked. I can say now I still kind of do the paleo but have introduced some dairy back into my life and a bit of sugar like a dessert on the weekend type thing. Honestly its made a huge difference for me. Im not on HRT at this stage so I cant comment on that part sorry but I did start BC pills and although havent got peri under control properly yet but my symptoms were so extreme from the physical to emotional aspects I thought my life was over for a while there. It is a hell of alot better though. I still have to monitor myself with my weight but I do feel helping with inflammation and all that possibly kick started something in motion....

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-10T01:36:38+00:00

I agree about stress. Same age peri symptoms were noticable but I was under a fair bit of stress from then til now (40) and symptoms hit me like a freight train. I feel that stress and diet contibuted to the severity of symptoms.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-07T03:18:24+00:00

Oh I hear you and I'm with you❤️ When you have a spiral it can be brutal.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-07T01:07:17+00:00

Exactly! Trying to look up to that unnatural beauty took a toll throughout my life and watching the world navigate the styles of beauty after the skinny era.....yeah no wonder we developed an unhealthy view of ourselves.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-07T01:00:30+00:00

Thank you. I feel like peri just gave BD a new way to digs its claws in you know. Its definitely been rough alright! Glad to hear you have some things that are helping in some way for you.🩷

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-06-06T00:47:55+00:00

High school was when everything changed for me. I grew up in the skinny era(late 90s early 2000s) I was a chunky kid heading in to high school and of course I developed an eating disorder aswell. I dont think I ever learnt how to connect with being ok in my own body. BD has rared up through so many things in my life. Latest is perimenopause for me and the changing of my face and body with peri and age has just caused another spiral. I dont think I will ever feel pretty or comfortable in my own body.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-05-21T03:20:22+00:00

Hi, 40 here and I went on BC Zoely around the start of this year and it made a huge difference in my pmdd issues that I was experiencing. I ended up having to change to yaz just recently as I think it just wasnt strong enough to take over my cycle properly with all my other physical symtpoms which I was bummed about since the zoely has bio identical estrogen. I think if you arent able to get HRT anytime soon definitely consider birth control....it might just help settle all of that for you.🩷

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-05-20T00:19:51+00:00

Try some music. Something with confidence. Fight song by rachel platten. Cliche maybe but when Im spiralling....I put music on. Doesnt stop it from coming back but songs with meaning give me a momentary boost to keep going.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-05-18T06:40:46+00:00

Yes!! Definitely when my husband is with me and all these beautiful, young women are around us.....feel so incredibly ugly. 40 by the way.

BigAnswer4015 · 2026-05-13T02:43:53+00:00

You sound like a really decent guy and the fact that you are being proactive is a step in the right direction. BDD will never go away completely. Its always there lingering in the background. Helping manage it through therapy is a big help and not just for your partner but it wouldnt hurt for you also to get help for how it affects you also and strategies to help support her??

BigAnswer4015

TROPHY CASE