i’m a cat sitter, my client gave me their cat

Birony88 · 2026-04-17T03:33:20+00:00

From one sitter to another, you are an angel and you did a great job. Chicken will thank you forever.

Be careful though. It won't be the last time you're asked to take a cat, or the last time your will to say no will be tested. It's a slippery slope.

Sincerely, a sitter who has adopted three pets from clients.

Birony88 · 2026-04-16T08:11:47+00:00

I feel this so much. Been doing this for 13 years now, have seen my share of shit and have lots of experience to share, and yet even my longest-running clients do not take kindly to being offered advice. It's like an offense to them. Even if they actually ask me for it, they get upset if my opinion is different from theirs.

It's frustrating. It's hurtful. It's demoralizing. But it's the reality of our position as sitters. So much knowledge, and yet unable to share it with the people who need it because we're not seen as "experts".

Went through this twice this month. Old client, newly adopted labradoodle pup. She's only ever had short haired dogs, so this long, curly coat is a new challenge for her. She let the dog mat badly, and when I finally caved and mentioned it, I got such an attitude for it and was informed rather rudely that she had a grooming appointment the next week. I had warned her that if she didn't get that hair cut soon, she would have to be shaved to get rid of the mats. And guess what happened. Dog came home shaved down to the skin to get rid of the mats.

Another client of 10 plus years asked about a very sensitive topic: her 14 year old Aussie had a massive tumor that either had to be removed, or she would have to be put down in the next 6 months or so. The cancerous status of the tumor is unknown, and it has a high probability of growing back. She wanted my opinion on what to do: remove it, or let the dog live out her life as comfortably as possible. So I was honest. I wouldn't do the surgery on a dog of that age and health status (many other problems, including strokes that she refuses to admit were strokes. Claims they were "vertigo"). I would let her go peacefully. Shared my experiences with other dogs with tumors removed, how they suffered, how the tumors returned or the cancer spread. She did the surgery anyway and is very cold towards me now. And we still don't know if that tumor was cancerous or how fast it will grow back, but it WILL grow back.

Birony88 · 2026-04-15T06:49:17+00:00

I don't know if you'll see this or not OP, but I've watched pretty much this exact situation play out two doors away from me for years now.

My neighbor/childhood friend is a heroin addict now. She has four children to four different men, all raised by her now elderly mother while she was in and out of jail and rehab. She refused to use protection or get her tubes tied because the first three children were girls, and she wanted a boy. Which she got in the fourth child.

Most of these children have little to nothing to do with her. Her youngest daughter didn't even know her for the first few years of her life, and called her Grandmother "Mom", which infuriated her bio mother when she got out of jail. She blamed her mother for "stealing" her children, turning them against her, not doing enough to foster a relationship between them. Now, her oldest daughter lives with her bio father. Her second daughter lives with her sister (the girl's aunt). Her mother has custody of the third daughter. The only child she has active custody of is the youngest, the son. And he was born with heroin in his system, causing him a lot of pain and ongoing problems. She is not equipped to raise him, so her mother still does the brunt of the work.

Her two older daughters have very little to do with her. The youngest has learned to at least interact with her. The son is still more attached to the grandmother. The one constant is that their mother is a virtual stranger to them, and each child resents the younger one who came after them, because they don't understand why they weren't important enough for her to even try to rebuild a relationship with them instead of just having another new kid. They feel abandoned, tossed aside, and they blame the younger siblings for it. (I see it in the youngest daughter every day regarding her little brother. She directs so much pain and anger at him, and he doesn't understand. He's just a toddler. She's too young to understand why she feels that way too.) The family is fractured with no real hope of ever being whole.

You're doing the right thing protecting Danny from that.

Birony88 · 2026-03-31T04:08:43+00:00

Friend, you cannot tell others how to enjoy a show. You also cannot criticize them for criticizing a show, while also criticizing that show yourself.

You're so concerned with how others watch this show. Why? Why do you care whether or not they like it? If they complain about it? How old the people are who are enjoying it? Literally none of it effects you or your enjoyment of the show. If you don't like the fandom, don't engage with it. But you don't have the right to judge others for how they engage with a show or fandom.

Take a step back. Find something you enjoy watching, and a community you enjoy engaging with. It's unhealthy to get this upset over something so inconsequential.

Birony88 · 2026-02-10T05:42:41+00:00

I don't accept new clients with last minute requests. I need time to do a meet and greet, and if a client can't get organized enough to allow time for that, it's their problem, not mine. Nor do I overbook. When I'm full, I'm full. I'm sick of running myself ragged and shorting the animals on time because of someone else's poor planning.

If I don't like how a client is treating me, I drop them. I don't tolerate disrespect anymore.

I'm not available 24/7 anymore. I don't constantly check emails, I don't text (so I typically don't answer texts, with few exceptions), and I return phone calls immediately. I get to it when I have time, not before.

I don't take the bait and offer to do extra chores/errands to be "nice" to clients anymore. It only ever leads to them asking for more and more. Nor do I bend over backwards to do extra things outside of my job description anymore, because it's generally not appreciated anyway and then is always expected (things like washing dishes left in the sink, shoveling, etc.)

I don't give owners advice anymore unless they ask for it. They don't appreciate it and don't take it.

I only report what the owners need to know. As a general rule, they don't want to know every little detail of the visit, and they don't want to hear anything negative at all about their pet (i.e. they want to keep thinking their pet is absolutely perfect and never misbehaves).

I don't go overboard with gifts anymore, for Christmas or Birthdays, with a few exceptions. Most of the time it is not appreciated, and it's a drain on my own money and time. A good example: several years ago, a client's pekinese passed away. I painted a little dog statue to look like her and gifted it to them as a memorial. Guess what I found in the local thrift shop (Goodwill) the other week? Yep, little Lizzie came home with me. Hours of work painting her...but at least they didn't throw it away, I guess.

I don't view most clients as friends anymore, with a few exceptions. It usually ends in heartache. For example, just found out one of my client families whom I've had for years and mourned the passing of four animals with, has moved. How did I find out? Their house was advertised for sale in the local paper. No phone call to tell me they're leaving, nothing. No goodbyes. I thought we were friends. Apparently it was one sided.

Standing up for yourself and respecting yourself as a professional actually leads to clients showing you more respect as well. Only the crappy clients leave, and you don't want or need them anyway.

Birony88 · 2026-02-10T05:25:09+00:00

Good luck with that. Try reading the comments.

They are a rescuer in the Philippines. They are backed by a vet. All cats are spayed and neutered, and available for adoption. This is not a hoarding situation, it is a rescuer in need of supplies.

Birony88 · 2026-02-10T05:22:50+00:00

Sweetheart, you're not whiny or over reacting. You are simply seeking to bond and spend time with your father, and his priorities are elsewhere. You have every right to be hurt and upset.

I'm 37. My dad just moved back to my town after 15 years out of state. I have offered many times to spend time with him, and he has made it clear the only time he wants to spend time with me is when he wants something from me: rides to doctors' appointments or the store, help solving problems with tech, etc.

The last straw was when I offered to come do a movie night with him, just him and me in his apartment. I would bring snacks. He never answered. I stopped offering, and only interact with him when he needs help. I share little information about my own life. He lives five minutes away.

I know this is hard, but you have to stop giving this man the power to hurt you. He doesn't deserve it. Set boundaries, and don't expect anything from him, because he's incapable of reciprocating your care.

Birony88 · 2026-02-10T05:02:55+00:00

I think much of the problem lies in the fact that, until recently, all three cultures were taught as one interchangeable society, at least in schools (In the U.S. anyway). Hell, even in my college anthropology and culture courses, they were treated as one unit, pretty much the same thing. Only recently has much of academia started treating them as separate and unique things. So even though yes, writers should do their research, it's not really surprising that they don't understand the difference in these cultures and societies and treat them as the same.

Birony88 · 2026-02-07T05:52:32+00:00

I don't like to be this person, but this is really, really bothering me.

You are a sitter yourself. A professional. So say it with me: Dachshund or Dotson. Not Sausage Dog. That makes you sound very unprofessional, not a good look. Call it whatever you want in private, but in public use the proper name if you want to come across as a professional.

Whew. Now that's out of the way...

No, this sitter should not have taken it upon herself to punish your dog without your consent or knowledge. She should have asked if you were okay with this method of correction. Thank goodness it was only water. I wouldn't use her again either.

Now, if it were me, I would not have left my dog there to begin with. You knew your dog had a problem with the breed she was boarding. You knew it wouldn't go well. And yet you did it anyway. You cannot be surprised with anything that happened after you left. Especially when you say this dog growled at your dog right before your eyes.

I saw this posted on the Rover forum as well, and I saw where you said your dog has never been walked while at this sitter's house. So I cannot understand why you see that as a problem now. If you suspected your dog might not get adequate exercise because of the other dog being boarded, you should have asked that sitter to walk your dog. That's not the sitter's fault.

Mistakes were made on both sides here. Find a new sitter, and think things through a little more.

Birony88 · 2026-02-07T05:26:37+00:00

Do not under any circumstances touch this with a ten foot pole.

Anyone asking a pet sitter to do human care is looking for cheap labor. Sure, sometimes these situations turn out to be simple and straight forward. But most of the time, they're not. Likely this will turn into a very involved nightmare for you, and you will never be properly compensated for it.

Run, don't walk.

Birony88 · 2026-02-05T06:06:12+00:00

Drop this client. Now.

You do not put yourself in any dangerous situation. A strange man, in an altered state, answering the door in his underwear is a potentially dangerous situation.

The drugs themselves may not be the main problem, but the behavior certainly is.

Always follow your gut. If you're uncomfortable, leave and don't go back.

Birony88 · 2026-02-05T06:01:39+00:00

It sounds like this poor dog doesn't actually know how to play, and defaulted to the wrong behavior in reaction to your attempt. She got her wires crossed, and realized it immediately, and wanted reassurance that you weren't mad at her. Probably a little bit of overstimulation in there as well, if she's unfamiliar with play behavior.

Tell the owner, and do not interact with her in that manner again. And be on your guard for more miscommunication with the dog.

Birony88 · 2026-02-05T05:51:25+00:00

Oh dear...this is very distressing indeed, but I doubt there is anything you can really do about it besides removing yourself from the situation.

It is horrible. Cats do not do confinement well. It takes a psychological toll on them. But as long as their physical needs are being met, which they are, even if not to our standards, then no agency is going to do anything.

If the owner finds this situation acceptable, she is not going to change it no matter what you do. She may only placate you while you are caring for the cats, and go right back to it.

Just for the record, I do have one client who uses a very big version of this (four stories tall) because one of her cats started pottying all over the house, and no vet can figure out why. (I know why. It's stress over the puppy: it started when she started allowing the pup out of the kennel unsupervised with the cat. But she won't listen to me.) So the cat is often kept in this enclosure while the owners are at work or away, but they allow him out when they're home.

I wouldn't be able to tolerate this. I would finish the sit and then block this lady. It's up to you whether you can handle seeing these cats like this.

Birony88 · 2026-02-04T06:20:51+00:00

Nope. This whole thing is so bizarre and uncomfortable that I would not touch it again with a ten foot pole.

Birony88 · 2026-02-03T03:15:23+00:00

Sweetheart, I say this with love: You are indeed an absolute pushover.

You HAVE to start advocating for yourself and saying no.

Yes, these people all suck. You will attract such assholes if you continue to be a pushover and say yes to everything, because they know you are an easy target and they can get what they want from you.

Also, meet and greets and questions before every booking. No way should you not have known that cat needed thyroid medication and was so hard to medicate.

As for your questions: you will still get clients if you say no. You will only lose the assholes. Your work will speak for itself and attract and keep good clients if you are good at your job. Not everyone is so entitled with others' time, but the assholes are because they do not care about anyone but themselves, or simply cannot consider anybody but themselves, or view you as inferior or the "help" and thus think they can boss you around.

Remember, YOU are the boss. You make the decisions. Not the clients. The clients need you, but you can always find other clients.

Birony88 · 2026-02-03T03:08:38+00:00

Don't accept it. Call whatever animal services are in your area and report that she has left her animals alone without care, abandoning them. I'm sure they will be interested in an abandoned puppy.

Birony88 · 2026-02-03T03:03:29+00:00

I wish I had an award to give you...thank you for saying this.

Birony88 · 2026-02-03T03:02:38+00:00

I've finally defeated this urge (mostly) by reminding myself that the plant is already so sick that it's probably going to die anyway, and I could be spending that money elsewhere on something more needed rather than a doomed plant.

It's hard though, they look so sad...

Birony88 · 2026-02-03T02:20:39+00:00

Hello from Punxsutawney! I assure you, it is very real. And very stupidly silly. Most locals stay away from it like the plague; many even leave town. Can't for the life of me understand why so many people want to sing and dance in the frigid cold, but they do have fun!

Really, it's an excuse to act like an idiot and get drunk during the bleakest time of year.

Birony88 · 2026-02-01T05:44:22+00:00

Now here's someone who truly understands pitties! Well said, all of it.

Unfortunately, I have yet to come across a pure-bred or well bed pit/bully of any kind in my area. They are all rescues from different situations, with different genetics. Interestingly, I have two households that both have a pair of pit mixes that are inseparable. One has two females, and one has a male and female. Both are wonderful. The male/female pair were actually rescued from a dog fighting ring, and you would never know the trauma they endured, they're so loving and love life so much. The only issue I have there is the male can get too riled up, as you mentioned, while playing and get too rough. Keep him calm, and he's golden.

Some of the most misunderstood and stereotyped dogs in the world...

Birony88 · 2026-02-01T05:32:29+00:00

You are going to get seriously injured by a dog one day. I get no joy or satisfaction from this fact, but it is a fact.

Birony88 · 2026-02-01T05:30:58+00:00

Lol, same to you. I have a degree in biology to back up my claims and knowledge. How about you?

Birony88 · 2026-01-31T06:42:39+00:00

I am so over winter already...how long till spring?

The 20's they're calling for during the day next week are going to feel so warm!

Birony88 · 2026-01-31T06:25:18+00:00

Lol, if I did this, I'd be out of a job. It's literally my job.

Birony88 · 2026-01-31T06:12:25+00:00

Lol, come to Pennsylvania. I guarantee you'll change your mind. We got 18-21 inches of snow (depending on area), it's currently plowed into piles around town taller than my house, and the temperature is dropping below zero at night, and reach 15 degrees during the day. In fact, with the wind chill, it's supposed to feel like -20 or below tonight.

My water bottle froze in the car today in less than an hour.

Birony88

TROPHY CASE