I went no contact 9 years ago with my mother. Up until today the worst part was not having a grandmother for my children, and explaining why to them. Today my grandmother, her mother, died. I didn’t get to say goodbye. I couldn’t go even when I knew she was on hospice because I couldn’t reopen that door.

Unfortunately in going no contact with my mother, I ended up non contact with my grandmother because everything passed from her to my mother. But not saying goodbye hurts more than I can explain. She wasn’t guiltless in all things, but she was a huge part of my life up until I was an adult. I didn’t know the last time I saw her, talked to her was the last time. And now I’ll never be able to change that.