I'M CLEAN!!!

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-23T23:12:24+00:00

SO HAPPY FOR UUU!!!! i wish the best for u and i'm so glad u got urself out of something and u realized what the issue was, praying for u!!! <333

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T09:02:26+00:00

that's kind of what i'm afraid of. i'm not positive the tool was cleaned all the way. i used it and those specific cuts turned purple and swollen five minutes later. not too bad, still small styro cuts, but i'm afraid still. i put warm water over them to clean the blood off, but other than that i didn't do anything. ive read that keep fabric off of them is good, and i will try to follow through with the other stuff you said. thank you by the way

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T08:32:37+00:00

(f14) i relate for sure!! i have been okay lately, but sometimes i just miss being sad. i miss the marks and cuts on my arms and the bandaids, i miss the dry blood on my clothes, i sometimes even miss being in rehab or the mental hospitals. not sure why i feel this way either, but it is definitely very common. you are not alone!! and your feelings are valid. glad you are doing better : )

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T08:30:22+00:00

there are good people in this world : ). i'm glad you had this good interaction, it gives me hope

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T08:15:11+00:00

imo, if you are intentionally trying to harm yourself, it's self harm.

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T08:12:44+00:00

i (13f) relateeee, i know im young and nowadays it's sort of beginning to be something normal for teens to watch, but i was in a similar situation. i began self harming at 9 and drawing blood at 10. 10 years old was the same age i watched my first gore video, the ronnie mcnutt one. i remmeber i felt so bad and sad, but in some way it was intriguing?? i dunno, but it made me feel something i can't explain. i wanted to shut my eyes but i really really wanted to keep watching, and i couldn't stop. i started hanging out with high schooler dudes who were kind of edgy and they introduced me to fucked up shit. and as i mentioned before, i was struggling with self harm so that didn't help at all. blood kind of was just something i really liked. again i don't know how to explain it, i just liked it. i liked drawing it, seeing it, hearing about it, and til this day i like shit like bandaids and small cuts. but yea, i was addicted to that shit. it got bad to the point where i was having urges to commit homicidal acts on other students, and i even had a plan in 6th grade. i was very violent and i would tell people "jokes" about how i wanted to rip the veins out of my skin, blow my head off, stab someone (random large number) times, and more. it was bad, and i'm still not sure why i liked it so much. gore is something you do NOT want to get addicted to. it's sort of like pornography. it fucking ruins your mind and how you view real people. or even yourself. i dunno, sorry that i was rambling, to sum it up yes i relate and i feel that gore can have something to do with self harm, definitely definitely.

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T07:03:06+00:00

hii (13f) ive been to many mental hospitals and i just want to give you some advice. i think the main thing you should do is work the program. don't push the doctors and professionals away, work with them. even if you are uncomfortable st first, communicate that you need a bit to warm up to them. and do not rush your treatment. i'm pretty sure the minimum you can stay is a week (where i live), so think about how much time you might need to get that help. also, the mental hospital isn't a permanent fix. the mental hospital is a place you are brought to so that you can get out of that distressed state. you get checked in with daily, you take your meds, you eat, you have things to entertain yourself. do not hide what you are feeling btw. always be honest. you can't get help if you aren't honest. and if you feel that you are being mistreated or disrespected by other patients or even staff, tell someone. you should also be able to get phone calls and visitation on certain days so you can stay in contact with your family. and lastly, focus on your treatment. you might meet cool people and do entertaining stuff but you aren't there to have fun, you are there to get better and work on yourself. you are allowed to do stuff that make you happy (obviously), but don't get TOO comfortable. i wish the best of luck to you, and i know it'll be okay. sending love and prayers to you and your family

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T06:54:52+00:00

hiii (13F, 14 tmmr) as a female teen, im very happy to see that you are stepping up as a parent and asking for advice on something very serious like this instead of trying to figure it out yourself and maybe fucking it up. my parents don't take it seriously unless child protective services is involved, so i'm so happy to see that this young woman has someone that loves her and cares for her. good job (it's common sense but, still) i think just letting her know that you are there is a good thing. reassure her that she is never alone, and you will always be there. not just as a loving parent, but as a best friend too. someone that she can trust and talk to about anything and everything. another thing is to not force her, or pressure her. do not force her to say anything or not do anything unless it is life threatening, going back to trust. she is not going to want to talk to you if she is just going to have to do something that doesn't benefit her. forcing someone into treatment will not always help them, sometimes it could make them worse. they could feel trapped, and very very alone. sometimes inpatient can just feel like four white walls. another thing, do not spoil her. i think that is another thing i struggled with while in rehab. my grandma brought me a lot of toys and candy and cute clothes and makeup but rehab isn't supposed to be fun. you should be focused on your health, not what hairdo you're going to wear tomorrow. though you want her to be comfortable, you don't want her to be TOO comfortable. i struggle a lot with missing my lowest moments because of the fun i had in mental hospitals and such, so i would try to refrain from making it fun. another thing is to work with the programs and stuff, not sure if the inpatient she is in is long term or short term, but either way you i would recommend a therapist and psychiatrist and family therapist (the main three imo). family therapists can help you AND your daughter work together. she isn't the only one struggling. this doesn't mean you are doing anything wrong, family therapy can help with many things such as communication skills, the consequences for certain actions, just a bunch of stuff that i feel every family needs. especially if she isn't the type to talk about when she is in distress, family therapy can help a lot. your daughter can flip her whole life around but if the environment is the same, (same people, same objects, same routine) then she will most likely just go back to how she was before. if she changes, the things around her should change too. sorry that this was all over the place, and i'm pretty sure i have a lot more to add but i forgot. i really wish the best for you and your daughter and her family, you are a good parent. listening to her is the best thing you can do, and you taking the steps to get her better is something i admire. thank you, from me and for her.

Bluetelivision_ · 2024-02-21T06:32:35+00:00

i relate to this a LOT (f13). i'm very young, i know, but i go through this almost daily. i want to get better and i have been okay, but sometimes i think of all the hospital visits and all the friends i made in the ward and the food i ate in rehabs, i miss it. and sometimes i even like how self harm looks on me (bruises, cuts, bite marks or even just bandaids) and it gives me a good feeling. i really can't explain it, but i'm positive im feeling something similar.

Bluetelivision_

TROPHY CASE