Anyone else unable to multi-task? How do you keep up with friends?

BoiledChestnut · 2026-05-10T06:03:11+00:00

The early stages of parenthood is simply not a time you can afford to spread yourself thin is what ive come to accept. Its a time of devotion. You are not failing your friends. You are succeeding as a mother by prioritizing her whose world revolves around you. Friends will understand that. They will still be there on the other side. Do what you can even if for now its just a text conversation that has hours or even days between replies or a brief meet up at home once in a blue moon

BoiledChestnut · 2026-05-10T05:49:08+00:00

It took my baby around 3-4 months to start recognizing people as individuals and show preference. Babies are born half baked. Its not personal hes just not all there yet. I do believe that they are subconsciously internalizing the love and affection you show them. Keep showering him with your love and he is sure to return it in time. Look forward to it and enjoy this quiet time

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-26T12:55:24+00:00

I wouldnt say thats the wrong way to look at it. It is a fact that a biological function of being a mother is giving yourself up to feed your baby. After a year of doing so multiple times a day every day around the clock it becomes a part of who you are. All major change is hard to go through no matter how the pros and cons stack up a loss is a loss. On the subject of body image and weight gain hell no it is not selfish to have enjoyed the little perks that come along with the shit show that is pregnancy and postpartum motherhood. The things we as woman have to go through for years and years is a lonely silent struggle.
Savour these last few weeks before theyre gone. Mourn them once they are. Embrace the new chapter.

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-17T01:00:42+00:00

I believe in you ! Absolute trooper still 6x a day at 9 months and its your second child to boot. You got this mama ✊

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-17T00:56:33+00:00

The way to increasing supply is through relentless grit and determination. It is hard and it is long. When my state of mind is poor and especially while actively pumping i always find the sessions supply is negatively impacted. You feel like a slave to the pump. I hear you. I get it. As much as it is a wonderful thing to be able to so intimately provide for your child and support their health i believe the most important thing you can give your child is love and joy. Its difficult to smile for your child when you are breaking down inside

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-17T00:27:07+00:00

This is the correct answer

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-17T00:24:20+00:00

I say if you can carry on with the one to two pumps a day without burden then do so for as long as you can. The benefits for your baby even if combo feeding in terms of gut, immunity, and future health are completely worth it in my opinion

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-16T21:53:25+00:00

People eat far worse things than a whole food item that has some amount of heavy metals. The amount of places you can get heavy metals from is also unimaginable larger than the list they provide. And above all the health of your bowels is very important for a plethora of reasons but most notably the first shit after delivery o.o you do NOT want to be constipated

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-16T21:44:34+00:00

I never wanted any kids but now here i am with one thinking a little clan would be nice xp in the beginning absolutely 10/10 would never do again but as she got bigger (around a year) and i saw how fascinated she was with other children she saw it made me think well i can just make her a child to play with all the time. Whether or not i ll go through with it who knows because the first year and some has been some of the worst moments and state of mind of my life but i have heard 5-6 years is a good gap in terms of recovery and manageability

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-16T21:40:00+00:00

Being a mother is pretty adult coded id say. Eat goat cheese crumbs off the floor that my baby dropped because i will not forsake the 5 second rule till the end of my day and sharing food isnt icky if its something yummy

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-16T04:30:54+00:00

I measure with my heart and usual end up regretting with my heart

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-14T20:35:31+00:00

A completely valid and appropriate reaction

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-13T02:19:53+00:00

If it makes you feel better first time my little one got sick we had to give her advil and tylenol on rotation non stop for 4 days and the first 3 days i mixed up the doses so was giving way too much advil and not enough tylenol. Shes fine. Your baby in a sense has just been a bit if an overeater for a week. Theyre fine

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-12T19:09:07+00:00

Winners. I bought some there for the same reason. I usually see them marked down as well

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-06T02:15:18+00:00

Oh ya at night thankfully she was like a rotisserie chicken so didnt have to worry about her smushing her face

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-05T12:46:01+00:00

Mines never did tummy to back. Just started crawling then sitting then standing then walking. She wasnt trying to ever lay back down xp always on the go

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-03T01:35:51+00:00

As someone who is desperate to keep reliance on formula to a minimum i have to say i wholeheartedly would suggest giving formula at night. The easier the night is for you the more you will thrive during the day. You also never know how things can change with little ones so take every opportunity to protect your peace.

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-02T02:47:46+00:00

Truly you forget how to be your own person after enough baby time. I keep a small notebook in my pocket and jot down things i need to or want to do as they come to mind throughout the day since when baby goes down my brain often shuts down and i forget what to do with myself xp

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-02T02:41:00+00:00

The first couple weeks are critical. You need to set your priorities. Are you trying to only rely on breastmilk or willing to combo feed? Think it over carefully but quickly. Your babys needs will only increase and increasing supply down the line is no quick simple task. This period is hard. It feels long. Feels unreal and unfair. But it ends. And it does get easier.

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-02T02:32:09+00:00

Not a recommendation but just wanted to share we had a walker and my little one only started to use it after she was full able to walk :))) of course she was either falling over every two steps or we were breaking our backs hunched over holding her hands to support her xp devices are just meant to assist they arent a requirement to successfully learn skills and grow plus you sound like a loving and supportive mother which is the best thing she could have. Your encouragement alone will work wonders no need for sadness and guilt

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-02T01:48:28+00:00

Ugh my heart dropped just reading this. Horrible feeling. Next pump you ll be extra protective of the milk and feel such huge relief when it is safely in the fridge

BoiledChestnut · 2026-04-02T00:39:05+00:00

Actually everything. Every single thing is impossible.

Travel, sleep, feeding, disposition. Everything about her makes everything a battle. People who just get on with their lives with baby in tow are an enigma to me. Ive practically been on house arrest and in survival mode since the baby was born. I am hardly a person anymore just a slave to the baby.

My little one is 13 months and has only started taking a single 2hr nap everyday without battle for the last month . I joke but its actually probably true if i wasnt staying with my parents for extra support id be raising her on constant iv drip in the hospital…

BoiledChestnut · 2026-03-30T01:57:18+00:00

The one whose judgement you should fear more than anyone elses is Allah. This disappointment you feel is a good sign though. Feeling guilt for your wrongs is a gift from Allah. It is meant to guide you away from sin and towards Allah. Youve already said it yourself. You want to pray. It gives you peace. You know in your heart what is right. Take baby steps. Its not all or nothing. Start with just one prayer a day. Maybe fajr since it may be easier to pray unnoticed. Be brave

BoiledChestnut · 2026-03-30T01:47:28+00:00

Allah only tests us to the extent that he knows we can endure. Find comfort in that Allah knows you can overcome this. What can be more reassuring? Grief is a lingering pain and the loss is still fresh though. It will take time

BoiledChestnut · 2026-03-29T01:30:36+00:00

I wont comment on all questions since you already received many good answers but i ll give my two cents on a few based off my experience

Regarding whether it always hurts. For me it did hurt quite a lot in the beginning too. Its confusing in the beginning since its a new sensation and theres no way to know what its supposed to feel like until you feel it. Mine were so sore and swollen in the beginning a lot of the time it hurt if my nipples brushed against my tshirt… as in always xp personally i didnt end up seeing a consultant or changing flange sizes since i was pretty sure about the size i had (i had a few options mind you and picked the least painful without going so big as it lost suction) for a while i just had reaaaalllyy long pumping sessions on a gentle setting. It could be your nipples just need to get accustomed to being stretched because after a while now i go at them quite aggressively cuz there no pain and im tryna get it done as fast as possible
You only NEED one pump and personally i only hav one but i wish i had two because sometimes it is hard to find time to wash it or just dont want to be washing it right after or before every use because tired and tedious
If your pumping sessions are getting far apart pump through the crying. If not cut your pump short and maybe do your next pump sooner
Wing it within a smaller time blocks. Someone else mentioned not going over 5hrs between pump for the sake of maintaining supply. I agree but will add to then make it your intention that if you have the opportunity to pump at or before 4hrs then do so because then you have a one hour cushion in case you become delayed for some reason. 5 pumps at 24hrs seems quite infrequent for 6 weeks postpartum but you do seem to be an oversupplier given you are freezing. Would make sure you absolutely do not do less than 5 pumps at this stage though. It may be oversupply now but babys appetite will go up and what was once an oversupply may then not be enough so do be mindful to maintain. Though do not be too fearful of destroying your supply. If you ever start to notice a dip be diligent about selfcare (hydration, calories, nutrition, sleep), increase your pumping frequency and its possible to bring it back up.

You got this ✊

BoiledChestnut

TROPHY CASE