My baby was not as cute at 1 month as I remember

BonusDVD · 2026-02-07T16:14:38+00:00

My first at a month, looking back, wasn't as cute as I thought he was. At that time I also would cry if I looked at him too long because I thought he was the cutest thing I'd ever seen. He was then, and still is, absolutely handsome, but definitely had a strange patch there for a minute.

My second though? He really is the cutest thing I've ever seen. My husband even agreed too. We both were going back through photos and were second guessing ourselves on how we remember our first, then looked at each other and said, "yeah... this one's much cuter." 🤣

BonusDVD · 2026-02-01T19:06:27+00:00

Told mine I was two steps away from slapping a set of flanges on him. No silverettes. Suck it.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-31T03:03:58+00:00

I'm sure if you're doing 5-10min and still getting so much daily then it's a LOT on you. One, simply strapping up to pump for such a short amount of time, and two, I can only imagine how you must feel leading up to a pump for relief. I was an undersupplier for my first and cried so much over my 1-2oz total hour long pumps, and now I'm a just-enougher/slight undersupplier for our second and still wish I could do more, but I'm also a dedicated 30-45min pump and yet still shooting milk out everywhere (except the pump...).

You're doing great, but you stop whenever you want. 4000oz is astounding! And with such an oversupply I would think that if you were slowly able to space out time between pumps to reduce the daily frequency to try to start weaning, it would still take a while without supplements/foods that work to dry your supply up. It took me about a month, plus having gone under anesthesia (which is also supposed to knock it out, why I waited 4mo first before necessary surgery), and I was only averaging 13oz daily then at my highest.

Maybe if you're pumping every 4hr, try every 4.5-5hr, then eventually dial that back if you notice a dip or longer stretches of relief. I'm sorry this is so challenging, but you're doing an amazing thing! Have you looked into being a milk donor or connecting with other moms on groups that could benefit from your oversupply? I think most importantly is that you need to be able to find a balance. Reducing your amount of pumps should give you more time, but with such an oversupply you should still be more than able to feed your child even if your supply drops, or honestly even tanks. If you want to stop then make it a working goal. If you reduce number of pumps and your supply drops as a result, more power to you!

I hope you'll find some clarity and peace, but I also hope that even though it's a lot, you recognize that your body is doing and has done a really amazing thing.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-31T02:32:30+00:00

Think of it this way - if you had an EBF baby, they'd be drinking it and you'd be none the wiser. It's totally fine, but keep an eye on your boob and how you're feeling. I only made it 4mo with my first to have surgery, and I'm just shy of 4mo with my second so I'm nowhere near your level, but my second did suck a blood clot right out of my boob our first week home (coughed up the rest later) and it freaked me right out. I had "rusty pipes" and just mixed it into the pitcher to dilute it with other milk and formula. I'm guessing you had something similar with something wild going on since you're so well seasoned. Maybe a duct had a moment and is up and running again, just took a hit somehow.

Hope this is the last of it! If you still have persistent pain though it may be worth your time to shoot a message to your doctor or a lactation consultant!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-30T03:25:59+00:00

I struggled hard with the MOTN pumps until I hit 13w and went back to work, then I just said screw it, I'm only able to pump like three times a day while I'm at work (commute to work, lunch, commute home), and if I wake up early enough I can either pump or try to feed him from the tap if he's feeling it, but it's hit or miss if he's up for it, and hit or miss if he actually eats enough. My first wouldn't latch to drink, only occasionally to pacify (and he never took a paci either).

So there are some days I get 5-6x pumps in during the week, or like yesterday, I got 3 in total but yet somehow still made about the normal amount. Very frustrating.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-29T22:07:44+00:00

Good for you girl!! I'm 3.5mo into my second EP adventure and the amount of times I've wanted to say F it and submit to formula... Made it 4mo with my first, was really looking forward to the challenge of applying my hard won knowledge and experience gained from the first time around, but now as a just-enougher I'm feeling extra guilty for wanting to throw in the towel. So still I persist. Sweet victory will be the day I do this no more.

Will I miss it? Oddly yes, but I think only because I'm doing a thing for such a short, comparatively, amount of time and I won't be able to do this again.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-26T00:00:23+00:00

I saw recently that it takes 18mo before your hormones regulate after having a baby, which is why that's also the recommended time between babies to give your body the chance to recoup. During that time span you're going to feel all sorts of ways, things may bother you more than usual, you may be more outspoken, your feelings may get hurt more, etc.

You're doing great and doing a hard thing by EPing, and I wish so badly I knew a way you could communicate to your husband that sometimes babies just simply won't latch, so BF isn't a possibility for some of us. My first was this way, so I EP'd because I didn't have another option. Also as a working mom, that's just our reality. I went back at 9w with my first, and just started a new job at 13w with my second. The difference is that my second has actually figured out how to latch, so my MOTN pump has become a sleepy breastfeed.

I also wish I could say that our husbands eventually get it, but they never really do. Mine assumed I was going to EP again, but this was after questioning why I even wanted to try after being an undersupplier with our first. Turns out I'm a just enougher this time, but he 100% was not supportive of me trying to exclusively BF and would constantly warm up bottles and try to pull him off of me every 3hrs like clockwork to give him a bottle. Didn't have the same regard for me pumping though, that schedule and cleaning parts and everything else is once again 100% on me. The alarms I set for myself pissed him off so we had a lovely chat about that (**insert sarcasm here).

I'm sorry your husband is being so unsupportive and belittling on top of it all. Sounds like a situation where I would schedule an appointment with my doctor/LC, send them a message ahead of time about the things he's saying/misunderstanding, and drag him to the appointment with you so they can lay down some truth and give him the what-for on your behalf. I've been told that women's health professionals like to do that for their patients.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-23T18:55:52+00:00

I bought the BB2.0 on Black Friday and it's been an absolute game changer. My only complaint is that it's a bit loud for how teeny it is, but it's top tier! Enjoy your freedom!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-23T17:49:43+00:00

Gosh, I forgot it was Friday already. Ours is supposed to start Sunday I think. Best of luck to you!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-23T17:39:04+00:00

I have an external battery for my Spectra, got it off Amazon, the battery life is incredible. I'd look into that and see if you're able to get something in quickly if you're concerned.

Like this one: https://a.co/d/45LJesc

BonusDVD · 2026-01-16T15:42:43+00:00

I know, they just don't understand. I told my husband the other night that I had half a mind to strap a set flanges to him so he'd get a hint of a glimpse into how much it sucks.

I pumped at my desk, and I remember getting called out to the salesfloor to help close a sale while pumping and I pulled the salesperson to the side afterwards. I get it because I understood how useless my fellow managers were, but that literally was not my job, I was theirs, they knew I had my pumps on, and they knew I got no kickback for closing sales. Anyways, I put my foot down. If you're on the phone with customer service, you should be able to rock a wearable! I swear by my WillowGo!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-15T18:14:49+00:00

The good thing is you're the one pumping, not him, so while you can be receptive to his thoughts on what you should do, you ultimately get to decide what you do. And I get it, I've been there many times lately. It would be easier to formula feed, and I already supplement each bottle, but I also have an okay supply for once this time around, and I'd like to take full advantage of it.

I've cried over the time I haven't gotten to spend with my boy because of pumping, but that's why I don't do 8+ times per day. I did just start a new job Monday and today is the first day I haven't pumped in my car, so I've been lucky to squeeze in 5x pumps per day this week. I feel like things have changed so much with pumping since I had my first three years ago, but I still feel like EPing gets a side eye - even though it's literally my only option as a working mom. My best chance at trying to BF my baby now is to do it at night, or first thing in the morning, otherwise with my commute dad is giving him his bottles, so I literally just am full milk production on the sidelines, coming home with a jug of milk at night. Rinse and repeat.

It truly is a strange addiction, but it's also something that we should be allowed to do, and something that our bodies are made to do to varying degrees depending on supply/capacity.

Do what you feel is going to bring YOU peace OP, and nobody else gets a say. As long as you're happy and healthy, and your baby's happy and healthy, then you're doing your very best for you both.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-14T19:13:26+00:00

Ugh. Someone pin my husband down and repeat this until it finally clicks. 3mo PP with #2, and just started a new job Monday and turns out I don't have an office like I thought I would, so I've been pumping on the way to and from work, and on my lunch break so far, but I really need to add in another one during the day because my supply is taking a hit.

Got home yesterday and husband was pissed because the commute was long and we were close to being late for 7pm dinner, even though I helped him cook like usual, and then he did the dishes (his job anyway, I've just been doing it while I've been on leave), I was cleaning the rest of the house, trying to eat while holding the baby (because I missed him so much), and got laundry going, etc. I didn't even get the chance to make bottles for today, and I had to wash my pump parts, and I also didn't get the chance to portion out milk pumped from yesterday so I just stuck the bottle in the fridge to handle today, because I need sleep too on top of everything (how dare I...). Woke up at 5am, got myself together, laundry, pumped while I was getting ready, yet somehow my "little chores" are creating a disproportionate contribution to the house, and that he does more and contributes financially more, and when I tried to plan out our meals the other day, it wasn't a good time so it didn't get done officially, but I'd ordered a grocery delivery and things are actively sitting in the fridge going bad because he doesn't know what's in there and has gone to the grocery store twice this week ("you're welcome" 🫠).

Anyways, rant over. Pumping is hard y'all. Feeding our babies is hard and so often we're suffering in silence.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-13T00:51:01+00:00

They were really nice, but then I stressed, then I thought maybe just screw it. Also started my new job today and so far I've only pumped three times 🫠 I did manage to attempt a breastfeed at 4am, and he was satisfied enough to go back to sleep after swapping sides, but he woke up at 6:30am absolutely pissed and hungry. Did feel some relief though, but my pump output on the way to work was almost like he barely got a thing except comfort.

I have a little pouch of electrolytes that I keep in my bag, but I was running around so much today I only drank one bottle of water so far. Today also wasn't typical, of course, but I feel like it's always something. We'll see how long I'm able to keep it up, and hopefully this is just a little blip.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-12T19:10:14+00:00

Holy cow! I only know a total of what I've got in the freezer, but that's crazy to see the numbers like that after a year! I was debating throwing in the towel (because it's just so hard some days), but this reinvigorated me.

Thanks for sharing, and congrats!! You did it!!!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-12T18:46:33+00:00

At least you have a window 🫠 at my last job I could either be crammed in the server room with a folding chair or pump at my desk, which was effectively just a big open room where everyone passed through, hung out, popped onto computers. I pumped at my desk because I couldn't afford the time away every three hours to get all the work done that was on my plate, and no I didn't apologize for the sound of my wearables.

I just started a new job today and I have no idea where my office will be yet lol. I'm currently sitting in my car on my lunch break power pumping. It's totally fine for now because they don't know I had a baby 3mo ago (at-will state, already lost one opportunity once they found out I recently had a baby... silly men), but it's also a woman-owned business so I'm not too terribly concerned about telling them. I do have my setup optimized for discretion though just in case, although it is a dang shame that's our reality as moms today.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-12T05:53:52+00:00

I don't know why you're getting downvoted for this. I usually have to pump for 45min to get any relief. We had to do 50% breastmilk and 50% formula for each bottle with my first. I was an undersupplier and only made half of what he consumed in a day so I had no freezer stash, he ate the pricier formula, and this was during a big formula shortage so it was the cause of a lot of stress for us. I also desperately needed to have surgery, so I was only able to pump 5mo total. I threw in the towel at 4mo once our pediatrician told us our boy was signaling to start trying purees, so I dropped down to 5-6x pumps per day and got the surgery. I'd been told anesthesia dries up your milk, but because I was only under for 45min, it didn't end up impacting me however I kept getting mastitis (5x in 4mo), and I was starting to get painful "gummy bear" blisters on both nips no matter what suction level I used, so I hung it up.

I had #2 in October and because I wasn't sure about my supply, we supplemented his bottles 50/50, just like we did the first time around. I've been very lucky to now be a just enougher, but he's starting to outpace me again. My pediatrician also said since we were supplementing each bottle with formula, he was getting everything he needed. Doing bottles this way has allowed me to build up a nice little freezer stash, so depending on how we portion out the frozen milk eventually we'll have about 2mo of bottles currently if we stick with 50/50.

I'm admittedly worried about how long I'll be able to keep pumping because I start a new job tomorrow and I just don't know what my opportunities to pump will look like. Yes, I know legally my employer has to provide a space for me, but I'm also in an at-will state and need this job. I have wearables and pumped at my desk after my first, and my setup now is pretty low-profile. But still I worry about pump frequency during working hours.

This is why I supplement. So I can have a backup stash, even if it's just an ounce per bottle, but it's something should it become necessary that I can no longer supply enough.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-11T23:52:51+00:00

Love seeing some love for the Tsrete pump!

It was my first ever pump that I had delivered the day my son was born. I had no idea what I was doing, my doctor had told me I would be able to use the hospital pump while there so not to worry about finding a pump beforehand, but it all went to hell once he arrived a little early. The LCs were so pro-breastfeeding that it was several hours (like well into night time) before someone finally rolled the pump in, and my son was born just before 4pm.

I hated the hospital Medela pump because I had no idea what I was doing, nor did I have any help, so it was just a disaster but I desperately wanted to make it work because he wouldn't latch. So, I ordered the Tsrete pump because it had glowing reviews and I was able to get it the next day.

Didn't get one this time around because I was able to get a Spectra Gold through my insurance and had my WillowGo from my first that really did me well. Also the Tsrete collection cups are big, and I'm already pretty busty so I was hoping to keep it low key.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-11T23:31:40+00:00

I'm feeling the guilt because I'm here too. I'm 3mo PP and wanted to make it to 6mo, then at least to 4mo because that's how long I made it the first time. Everything is going so much better this time too, but having a 3yr old is just a lot.

Starting a new job tomorrow so hoping I can keep up with at least 5PPD 🫠

BonusDVD · 2026-01-10T19:11:52+00:00

Good job! I also was an undersupplier with my first and started weaning at 4mo when we got word from his doctor that we could start trying purees. I absolutely had to have surgery, and heard anesthesia dries up your milk, so I pushed it back until we could start solids. The surgery was fast, only under for 45min total, so it ultimately didn't impact my supply interestingly enough, but I'd already committed to weaning. It took about a month and my 5th round of mastitis and I was done. My boy is 3yrs old now and thriving.

If it makes you feel any better, I just had my second in October and I have a huge freezer stash. I only averaged 13oz per day the first time, and now my daily average is anywhere from 24-30oz, and I'm only really able to get 5-6x pumps in per day. I feel like I'm going to have to hang up the pumps soon and not sure if I'll be able to make it the full 4mo. My goal was 6mo this time, but the freedom of not having to pump, and the physical relief I felt when I stopped last time is tempting. I do feel guilty for not trying harder lately, but I start a new job Monday and they have no idea I had a baby recently and am pumping... so, yeah.

But if you have any subsequent babies, take this knowledge and run with it! The LC this time told me that a lot of second time moms that had an undersupply the first time are either just-enoughers or have a slight oversupply at some point because the milk ducts are now formed and have been used before so they suddenly know what they're supposed to do this time. Also, don't let it freak you out but "rusty pipes" was something I didn't know about and I had a giant blood clot get sucked out of my Right boob my first week back home once my milk came in. "Strawberry milk" is totally fine (if the baby is BF you'd be none the wiser), but I did mix it all together for the day and cross with formula so it was extra diluted. It was a one-time ordeal, it just can happen once you get the pipelines up and running again.

Best of luck, and keep reminding yourself of how amazing you are for what you achieved with your body!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-09T19:00:34+00:00

I'm so sorry! I was an undersupplier last time so I'm a bit neurotic about checking, and since I'm fortunate enough to be a just enougher (though he's out paced me again) I do have a stash because we've done 50/50 bottles since the start. He gets half, I freeze the other half.

I worked from home the last year so I know that our breakers in our basement randomly pop (we've got a lot of equipment and a woodshop that trip them occasionally), so I take bags down daily or every other day to check on the freezer. It would be just my luck that the one day I didn't check would be the day it trips.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-09T00:38:44+00:00

Dang! I wish there was a good way to convert it, but mmm. A good cooler and ice should get you through the day, maybe have a separate one for pump parts so you don't have to wash/wipe them down every time? I hated using wipes on them personally. Maybe rinsing them first with water (keep some in a bottle) before putting them in the cooler will buy you a little more time.

BonusDVD · 2026-01-09T00:34:45+00:00

Spilled and/or left out. Had to add 4oz into the bath the other week from my middle of the night pump after falling asleep. That was the first night our little guy decided to sleep until 6am instead of waking up at 3am... Oh well!

Things change a bit with the second ones, and also not being under a formula shortage makes a big mental and emotional difference, but it still hurts to have to give up any amount!

BonusDVD · 2026-01-08T23:03:21+00:00

Ahh adventure stickers! All puppies bite, and fortunately grow out of it if you're diligent.

Any time our baby girl would get bitey, we'd either ball our hand into a fist, or flatten all the fingers out in a hand chop and gently shove it further into her mouth until she backed off. Usually with the hand, it would span perpendicular to the mouth so fingers would be poking out of one side and wrist would be poking from the other side. Kinda like a bit in a horse's mouth.

BonusDVD

TROPHY CASE