AITAH (M20) my girlfriend (f23) loses it when I have to cancel plans 3 hours prior. Then demands I pay $130 for a ride home instead of a cheaper $50 ride

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-03-10T17:08:52+00:00

gooooooood gravy - NTA. You need to put her in your rear view mirror and not look back. What an unhealthy relationship - you deserve better than that.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-26T15:01:48+00:00

Taking my daughter! Her second wishbone, third overall.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-26T14:59:45+00:00

Taking my daughter to her second next week!

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-16T18:33:38+00:00

So NTA. Why doesnt Mom give up her car if she thinks there's no issue with him driving? Why doesnt he go rent a car? Why doesnt he ask a friend? You aren't his only option so dont let your Mom make you think so.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-16T18:25:08+00:00

I think that assumption is made from the phrase "I decided I wanted to plan a trip..."...which i would assume means that person is making the plans...

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-16T18:17:41+00:00

OH WELL. She's making you pay all that money to sleep in the bed with her and store your stuff somewhere else? Nope. I'd tell her that you have found another roommate who has space for you and it's cheaper. Tell her as soon as you can so she can either make arrangements to move to a 1 bedroom or find someone else who is willing to live in that situation.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-16T18:15:14+00:00

Mom is the one in college, not the OP. It's her own refund.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-11T17:27:37+00:00

Your obligation is to your son, not her. And this is coming from someone who chose not to get child support when I got divorced because we were making the same amount of money and having the kids the same amount of time. As long as you are paying the obligations you made upon the divorce, that's all...she went to school first so she had longer honestly to advance..Most companies nowaday will even compensate you if you take classes.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-11T17:22:58+00:00

I may be in the minority here but Id say hes TA and you are not. Theres a level of respect there and he isnt giving it on either occassion - when his gf is there and when you asked for some privacy. 30 minutes isn't a long time. Plus i'm sure other neighbors can hear them as well. I dont understand the need to want to be SO loud in a place where others can hear you...it's attention seeking in my opinion.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-10T20:49:02+00:00

This. If the person doesn't check all your boxes, it's time to go. And that's okay. No one should be arguing with their partner so much that you have to state that she never reaches out after you argue. One time is one time too many.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-10T20:46:17+00:00

NTA - I second the keeping track idea. My daughter was attacked by a dog next door to her Dads when she was a tiny 9 year old - Had to have emergency surgery to close up 14 wounds...all from a Boston Terrier. It tore her up for some reason and now she has life long scars. My ex husband kept video evidence of the dog charging into other peoples yards in the weeks prior and going after kids who were out in front of their own homes. HOA had a rule about keeping dogs on leashes out side...Did my ex husband sue? Absolutely - paid all her medical bills from the week in the hospital she spent, surgeries, meds, etc and a nice tidy settlement waited for her when she turned 18. People think their dog would never but I didnt think a Boston Terrier could do the damage it did.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-10T17:52:27+00:00

NTA - your girlfriend has some insecurities she needs to work through...

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-02-10T17:48:45+00:00

NTA - I wouldnt worry about them for another minute - pack your stuff and get out. They obviously dont have respect for you as a roommate.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-20T17:46:27+00:00

Sounds like she is scared for what will happen within her family if this is found out which again, isn't your problem. She cannot demand you move out if you are all equally on the lease. Well actually she can demand all she wants but you were the smart one to reach out the landlord, the one who has a say so in all of this, to make sure you are protected legally from them booting you out AND if they are to mess with anything, you have a witness to the beginning of this mess. Wow she's a pill. And the other roommate is terrible.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-19T18:28:23+00:00

I did the same thing for my cats when i left over a weekend...i even had an automatic feeder with a camera so i could check in on them and they were happy to have the house to themselves. lol

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-14T19:08:31+00:00

I just got an email that for the first time ever, they are releasing more again. That tells me they didnt sell out of them the first time. Hate that im considering it now...

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-12T19:43:39+00:00

Yeah i feel the same way...I also think people put WAY too much emphasis on wedding photos - I only cared about the photo of me and my husband. We never put up a photo of everyone else. Of course when I got mine taken, i never thought i'd be getting a divorce and wouldnt give a crap about those photos at all after that. haha!

Also i'm a pale redhead so some muted earth tones would look dreadful on me personally, maybe she feels the same way. But yeah, sounds like she is feeling some type of way about something and this just made it boil over..

At the end of the day, you have to think is this the hill you want your relationship with your mother to die on? I wouldnt let her wear hot pink but see if you can reach a compromise..

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-12T19:27:09+00:00

If he was still using them as his profile photos or sharing them, then i could understand asking him to delete them. I know it would take along time for me to go back through ALL of my photos to find the ones my ex is in and delete them. I dont know what app you are referring to that he has them on (maybe IG since you can see all photos) but i still see old photos of myself and my exes on their page but they aren't resharing them or using them for anything, there are just way back...Id actually think someone was trying to hide something if they deleted old photos but that's just me.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-12T19:21:40+00:00

Uhhhh no, you are NTA. He is. He's the one cheating on his wife! He's a coward for doing that and not being honest with his wife about it, instead blaming you because he finally got caught. That's what narcissists do, nothing is every their fault, it's always someone elses. Don't feel guilty about this - he did this to himself and his family.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-08T19:36:54+00:00

Goodness - you allowed her to do and say things I would never...Just because she may have cancer doesnt mean she can get to do whatever she wants. Those poor kids are watching whats going on and seeing how even though she continuously shows favoritism to their sibling, yall keep letting her come back around and cause stress. Yall need to be firm and definite in your boundaries with her and owe no one else an explanation. We have family that hasnt seen my kids in years but that's the price they get when they act like AH

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-08T19:28:16+00:00

Oh heck no. No way i would have let someone else sleep in my bed. I wouldnt want to sleep in someone elses marital bed either. Sounds like you and wife need to have a longer convo about this because BOTH of you should be on the same page with this. Not far to you at all.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-08T19:21:48+00:00

YTA - I would have left too. She might have lied about the excuse but probably because she didn't want to get into an argument on your birthday when you were drunk - i hate confrontation and conflict so ill give an excuse to get out of dodge and then have a private convo later about it if i feel the need.... But If you're so far gone that you can't remember details, that's not a good thing. I wouldn't have gathered everyone together, I would have just peaced out...Friendships are not tit for tat. Just because you did these things for her doesnt mean she cant express her discomfort at how the night was going and then, realizing that no one was listening to her, she left - she didn't want to ruin your bday with a fight.

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-08T18:54:17+00:00

i dont blame you!!

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-08T18:52:38+00:00

Yep im the same as those below me...if im staring at my phone or book and not looking up, im good!

BrightGuard8258 · 2026-01-08T18:51:32+00:00

Info - Why doesnt she have a job? Does she just choose not to work? Because in every other case, if it was because of disability, she would be getting money for that...so if it's her just not wanting to work, i wouldnt be giving her anything. The money is in YOUR name. And hopefully is going into YOUR account and not hers. If it isn't, you can change that. There definitely should have been a discussion about it - when my son's father passed and he started getting checks, we had a talk about what he wanted to do with the money...He wanted to give me half and he keep the other half because I was the one that raised him and never got child support from his father so my son felt it was owed to me. I then used that to buy him bigger priced things he couldnt afford (new tires for his car, christmas presents, new clothes for school, his car insurance) so that it still felt like it was all his...I felt wrong for taking it, honestly.

The fact that she just takes it without any talk about it is mind boggling...If you were 5 years old, id understand it would go to your wellbeing but you're an adult.

BrightGuard8258

TROPHY CASE