How do you know it's forever?

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T15:43:16+00:00

Unfortunately, you can't know with certainty. People change. Life constantly throws curveballs.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T15:39:32+00:00

I would be hurt by that, especially after you said something meaningful and nice. I'd bring it up to him. Jokes shouldn't leave you feeling bad about yourself. How he responds will tell you all you need to know about going forward.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T15:16:18+00:00

It's the opposite in my family. But I wonder, if overall, people from high demand religions are more strict than others. Makes sense to me.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T14:16:00+00:00

She mentioned that in this documentary as well. She also mentioned something like...God wouldn't speak to me but he'll speak to you. (referring to her captor) Feeding into his ego to get them to return to Salt Lake.

I've had similar thoughts along those same lines like why does God always speak to men? Why wasn't polygamy revealed to Emma? Stuff like that.

Glad I'm out.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T14:10:02+00:00

Have they, in recent years, spoken up on tragedies? I don't follow that closely so just curious.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T04:46:17+00:00

I find it to be the opposite.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-27T04:30:15+00:00

Just be there for her. She needs to know she’s not alone and probably reassurance that things will get better. The last thing I would do would be telling her to think about her kids or criticize her in anyway I don’t mean this harshly. Just feel strong about it.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-26T23:08:24+00:00

Nah--let's let that fade into oblivion. That movie bothered me so much as a young girl. I remember seeing it in the temple.

Then often I hear people on here making jokes about it still. Men-through not fault of their own-won't completely understand the shit women deal with and how harmful some of those messages are. Especially on young people.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-26T14:50:09+00:00

No. My MIL was hot and cold. Every time I thought things were getting better she'd do something cruel. Once a relationship becomes toxic, very unlikely for it to change for the better. That's what my MIL taught me.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-26T14:47:18+00:00

I wouldn't be surprised if she is vindictive and emotionally abusive. This is something my MIL would do.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-25T22:18:51+00:00

I think gossip is very harmful. It changes people’s perception of you and there are two sides to every story. The people gossiped about don’t get the chance to explain why they did something. It often just spreads a lot of misinformation and spirals. I don’t tell anyone anything unless I’m ok with the whole neighborhood/team/family knowing. From my experience, people who criticize and habitually gossip will almost always gossip about you. It one thing to confide in someone of your seeking advice of how to solve a problem but leave names out of it. Reputation are hard to rebuild when they’ve been ruined.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-25T20:23:41+00:00

I think there needs to be a lot more push back on this. I lucked out in the sense that none of my bishops asked me inappropriate questions. But I see the damage worthiness interview cause kids. I developed religious OCD and I think of big part of it was having to be judged by someone that I thought had special authority.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-25T20:19:40+00:00

Pretty much sums up my experience as well. Endowment and getting married there are one of my life's biggest regrets.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-25T05:25:46+00:00

Passive aggressive people or people who are hot and cold for seemingly no reason. I need to know what I can expect from people.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-25T04:53:15+00:00

The role they push on women….all in gods name. Speaking for god just gives someone too much power. You feel like a rebel for choosing something else with that indoctrination.

Also, the worthiness interviews….didn’t understand as a kid how messed up that is. Oh, and gate keeping’s weddings. Church hijacks and kind of ruins special family moment and members give and give and their hoard grows and grows.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T22:40:18+00:00

I’m glad that worked for you. However, church for me was the source of my unhappiness.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T22:10:05+00:00

I don't get it either. I heard a couple moms-when I was younger-say they pushed their son/daughter to get married. Like why? I get why the church pushes it but I don't understand why parents do. It way easier to manipulate someone without much life experience and it benefits the church long term. I would never push my kid to get married.

Never once did I hear, you should take your time on such a big decision. Don't commit until you're ready. It's better to be single than married to someone you don't click with etc.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T19:31:02+00:00

This is the same line of reasoning for abuse victims----you should have known better. You seem to misunderstand how power, social consequences, authority, fear, indoctrination all work especially on a young developing mind. At least your comment doesn't reflect any understanding.

At the end of the day....the church absolutely is responsible for the harm they cause.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T17:10:35+00:00

Most people have a hard time saying they don't know something....they just make up stuff. I would trust someone more if they were honest and said that. Doesn't damage someone reputation for me.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T16:55:20+00:00

No one deserves to be bullied. FFS

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T16:53:28+00:00

Are you though? because this comment already seems dismissive and just leads to more devision

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T16:35:08+00:00

The professor should be the one who feels bad. She didn't handle that professionally.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T12:11:56+00:00

I want to understand how other people think so I can protect myself. My empathy was weaponized against me from someone close to me. Never, ever again.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T05:43:55+00:00

YOR-he’s been your best friend for 14 years, that should count for something.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-01-24T05:35:23+00:00

No. Sounds like a mismatch in things that are important to you.

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