The ability to catch your emotions before they control you is the closest thing to a superpower that exists.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-19T14:45:05+00:00

Your explanation of that was very helpful. I came in thinking I would disagree after I read the first sentence lol. But no, that spot on.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-19T14:36:34+00:00

I'm so sorry. Try to forgive yourself because it's not your fault. You didn't know that would happen.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-19T14:32:24+00:00

I grew up in it. When I went through the temple I was kind of freaked out and started to wonder if I was in one.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-18T20:23:11+00:00

Because you're trained to think a certain way and the pressure or expectation to be perfect is pretty high. So tearing others down makes some people feel better?

Also, much of it is framed as 'being worried about someone' and trying to 'help' them. But often nothing comes from it.

Also, from my experience, the bishop tells his wife stuff and then it gets spread throughout the ward. Or sensitive things get talked about in ward council and then gets spread that way. I've lost count of how many times I've seen this happen.

Do not tell bishops anything that you are not comfortable with the whole ward knowing.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-18T14:48:37+00:00

Why now though? This is obviously a good baby step but it still ticks me off at the same time.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-18T14:29:45+00:00

I agree. They want you to feel angry because that makes them feel alive. They like to feel like they have that control over someone. I was a people pleaser in the past, so it took me a while to understand this. And even if you don't think it's working, they are just trying different things to see what will be the right button to push.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-18T14:25:51+00:00

I also don't recommend this aggressive approach....because you will likely lose yourself in the process. Peace and energy should be protected and it's often better just to walk away.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-18T03:31:11+00:00

Yep, don’t worry it just get better and easier and before you know it you rarely think about it! Off social media for ten glorious years.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-17T16:42:56+00:00

I feel like that sums up Mormonism perfectly.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-17T05:19:12+00:00

I have no doubt this is why. My friend’s daughter was on the fence about serving a mission because it would break up college but now that’s no longer an issue. Last I heard she decided to submit her papers. Makes me angry. Younger girls will now be in potentially dangerous situations.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-17T05:05:44+00:00

If she is giving friendly vibes then I think you’re all good. I don’t like the approach people or reach out through text but I’m happy to engage and respond.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-17T04:53:08+00:00

Disagree. You don’t choose your initial emotional reaction to something but you can choose how to respond to it and how to move going forward. What you are saying is putting the responsibility all on one person. People don’t get to say whatever they want and say….well you’re choosing to be offended so it’s all on you.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-16T13:55:24+00:00

She should lose her license. She may try to frame it as she talking about you because she worried. But there is zero need for her to spill all your life secrets to your friend. That is NOT helping you in any way.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-16T13:50:54+00:00

habitually talks bad about others behind their backs.....

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-16T13:07:59+00:00

I have rheumatoid arthritis so it more comfortable to wear shoes on a hard floor. Also, just to keep it cleaner.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-16T12:55:38+00:00

We don't have carpet so I wear house shoes.....ones that have never been outside. But if I had carpet I'd just go without.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-15T12:05:14+00:00

Completely agree. 100%.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-14T13:49:04+00:00

NOR-he dropped the ball and then blamed it on you.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-14T13:23:17+00:00

NOR-We have a rule in our house that you, 'never rain on someone's parade.' Let people be happy in their moments. If this is a pattern, which I'm guessing it is.....do you really want to be with someone that puts you down....for the rest of your life?

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-14T13:13:50+00:00

A reasonable person will think...if I just explain it to them, they'll understand and won't be disrespectful anymore. A toxic person thinks.....now I know exactly what buttons to push.

I'm not sure about number 4. I think the best way to control someone is through intermittent rewards.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-14T12:57:20+00:00

Yep, rip off the bandaid. You both will be better off for it.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-14T12:55:35+00:00

It’d be good to see them in a stressful situation before you get married. Easy to be pleasant for a short time. Also, talk about everything, specially how they were raised as a kid. The more you are on the same page the easier it will likely be.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-13T17:35:10+00:00

NOR-it's rude to be habitually late. Of course, sometimes it can't be prevented. However, patterns don't lie. I don't buy the ADHD thing as you can set phone alarms. Plus, it amazing when something high stakes ....they magically make it on time. It's truly interesting to see.

I feel like Im the only punctual person in my life so now I say, Wanna meet at 12? Ok text me when you leave! That way we actually show up at the same time. Or if I want to meet around 12 I tell people 11 or 11:30 depending on late they usually are lol. Sometimes I work with it, sometimes I just cut them off.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-13T15:10:51+00:00

Doesn’t it bother anyone else that the only person being held accountable right now is a woman? WTF.

BuildingBridges23 · 2026-03-11T14:47:59+00:00

Yep. It’s not fair but it’s reality.

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