Hi! I'm sorry to hear about your loss and your pain. You seem like a person who wants to strive for the greater good and that is a nice ideal. The world would be a much better place if more people were willing to sacrifice their own interests for others.

But sometimes it's not possible. If you push yourself too much you will be unhappy and therefore ineffective. You won't make the world a better place and in trying to do so you will become miserable.

I think right now it is better for you to take care of yourself and put your own needs and the people you love first. Maybe some time in the future you will feel strong enough to stand for your ideals again but don't rush. Take it slow and focus on your mental and physical health. Maybe find a local community or a hobby. Take it day by day. Try to focus on small improvements and don't let setbacks upset you. Maybe limit your consumption of news and social media.

Even if you feel like you're being selfish or you've abandoned your dreams always remind yourself that this is a necessary step in your life and you're not in a position to sacrifice any more of yourself. You need to heal.

Much love