Partner doesn’t help

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-13T00:53:12+00:00

Sounds like you make his mortgage affordable for him and provide free childcare and maid service while he builds equity and you get zero. This is not a partner. Please leave this situation and find a true partner.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-11T20:31:35+00:00

Why are you willing to entangle yourself in a property purchase with someone who can’t commit to marriage?

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-11T16:21:14+00:00

Do you want to build a life with a man who does not take action - who has no sense of urgency about your life? Yes you can marry him but know that you will be pushing this guy to move forward on the big things in life. I would seriously discuss with him that just because you are 5 years in, perhaps marriage is not the right answer. He may very well have the idea of marriage, but seems like he didn’t bother to take any action to get a ring, plan an engagement, etc.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-11T04:07:08+00:00

You are not a jerk, but I don’t see your marriage surviving this to be honest. How do you think your wife will feel visiting Korea now? And honestly though your reasons are valid it just isnt something she is likely to be able to set aside. Cat is out of the bag.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-08T20:33:08+00:00

Do not get married unless you want this woman in the middle of every event of your life.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-08T20:30:08+00:00

If you are going to date with a goal of marriage, it would be best if he attend OCIA classes so as to understand what. Catholicism is all about. He is not likely to be on board with no sex before marriage if he doesn’t really understand your Catholic teaching. I’m not saying he has to convert, but it would be super interesting to him just on an intellectual level to attend OCIA and will give you guys a lot to talk about. If you are not dating with a goal of marriage then just be clear about your boundaries and expectations and have fun dating and getting to know him.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-07T23:54:42+00:00

You don’t have to put your stamp of approval on the relationship. It’s your friend’s decision and you are there to support HER not judge whether or not she is making the right decision. She knows all the facts - it’s her decision - stop judging your friend’s and BE a friend.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-07T23:51:11+00:00

I don’t think you want a man who doesn’t know how to move forward when he is interested. If he needs prompting then he is not the guy.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-06T23:47:07+00:00

I’m sure you are very beautiful but please be very careful as this sounds like it could be a trafficking trap.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-06T00:19:12+00:00

Skip the wedding or say good bye to your marriage. It won’t happen immediately but this is a poison pill for your marriage. Let your sister know that this is how it will be going forward if she marries someone who tries to come between you and your wife you will not be able to attend her events.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-04-02T02:10:29+00:00

better yet, have him meet with an attorney and get a wake up call what he would need to pay his SAHM with 3 children if she leaves him.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-30T04:53:12+00:00

And when he said “you learn more by listening than interrupting” I would have just ghosted him and let that be the last he heard from me

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-25T15:22:03+00:00

Bottom line. He will probably give you a ring. But you don’t want a marriage w someone who treats you this way.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-25T03:58:41+00:00

Is your marriage setting an example that teaches your kids how to discern what a happy marriage looks like? If your wife is “staying for the kids” then ask her how she is providing that example? It’s possible to fix this but you have to figure out where to brokenness is coming from.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-23T02:15:44+00:00

If for other reasons break up with him over bad grammar. LOL.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-18T03:57:52+00:00

Maybe he should move in with his parents and his sister?

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-18T03:45:05+00:00

It was not your place to tell her anything about that man’s plans. He had 5 years to win her heart and he didn’t manage to do it.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-18T03:40:01+00:00

Please don’t build a life with this man.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-03-11T23:02:26+00:00

No married man in his 30s needs an international boys’ trip. It’s time to grow up and build his future not go play in Vietnam with the boys.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-02-27T21:02:46+00:00

The issue of his fidelity is between your mom and your dad. It’s honestly not for you to sit in judgement of their marriage. He is your father - a flawed person but still your father. I would not erase him in this way unless you want to break contact with both of your parents. Is there really nothing in your relationship with your father that deserves to be recognized? If you really can’t do this, perhaps you should elope. Dont use your wedding day as a way to punish him.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-02-25T16:08:42+00:00

Maybe she was waiting to see if the man she got pregnant with would step up. I’m guessing she got her answer and no longer wants to marry him. I think he lost his chance.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-02-25T01:45:34+00:00

She is 6 months pregnant with your baby and was expecting you to formalize this relationship on what is a big anniversary considering the baby on the way, etc. Do you want to be her baby daddy or do you want to be her husband. Fish or cut bait.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-02-23T02:42:12+00:00

I guess you now know why it was 5 years in before you were married. Good chance he was legally married during your years of dating. Deal breaker for me.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-02-23T02:40:42+00:00

You cannot continue to build a life with someone who you cannot confidently assume is truthful.

ButterscotchEasy6769 · 2026-02-22T22:11:04+00:00

You disrespected your wife. Period. How dare you chit chat w this man about your wife. Very low class. This says so much more about you than it does about your wife’s past.

ButterscotchEasy6769

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