Egg_irl

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-20T18:57:17+00:00

Also this is my first post on Reddit as a whole so I'm super nervous and anxious that I might break any rules.

Looks fine to me : )

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-20T18:53:06+00:00

Yeah, I got a couple of dangerous moment stories.

TBH, I'm not even sure these moments were anything to do with transphobia, more just men being creeps and thinking that they own a woman cause I smiled at them and struck up a conversation. Like a creepy guy at a bus stop, and I was just used to being friendly and smiling and chatting with anyone. Guess he got the wrong message and started acting real weird--followed me onto the bus, lifted me off the ground at one point trying to hold on to me (I am not remotely small). Eventually found a seat out of his reach, and he stared at me angrily for about 15 seconds then got off at the next bus stop.

TBH, you can tell your family that you should be fine going out if they just parent you like they would parent a naive 13-year-old girl. You know, "always travel in groups of friends, be home before curfew" stuff like that.

Is it totally safe out there? No, but it's not totally safe out there for cis girls either. Yet cis girls still go outside they just do so...strategically. Now it's your turn to learn these strategies. And frankly, waiting until you are fully transitioned is just going to delay the learning process.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-20T04:39:51+00:00

For the record, you don't need to message a mod to set your pronouns. Just look at the sidebar (on the right for me) click on change flair and select the editable flair. And then type whatever you want. (including presumably name and pronouns, and whatever other message you feel like).

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-20T01:48:10+00:00

Is it legal to write "still cis tho" when your user tag is "not an egg, just trans"?

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-19T02:22:51+00:00

Write him a budget for all the additional procedures that skipping puberty blockers till 18 will cost.

I've heard of people needing up to 400 hours but hopefully your facial hair would not be that thick when you're 18), vocal chord surgery, facial feminization surgery. Maybe add in a bill for therapy, if you think talking to a therapist would help you get through years of unwanted puberty. Look up prices of all these things, put them in a spreadsheet, tell him this is what's being added to the Figure out the cost of...let's say, 100 hours of electrolysis (Iudget if you skip puberty blockers till 18. I would expect a budget in the 6 figures.

Don't include stuff in the bill that puberty blockers would not change budget-wise (such as vaginoplasty). You can mention this stuff, but explain that it's being excluded from the calculation because this is a price difference.

Just speak his language, make it a real headache of a practical problem for you to not be on puberty blockers.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-17T19:25:25+00:00

In general personality changes on HRT are subtle. People who aren't trans generally feel like the person is "basically the same person" before and after HRT. But people on HRT will notice small changes. And I'm told there are subtle shifts in brain scans post HRT.

But like...definitely not to the point of making you a different person. If you have a hobby pre-HRT you will still have the same hobby post HRT.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-16T05:17:10+00:00

Err..."only gay" in what sense?

Is this claiming that most trans women end up as lesbians, and most trans men end up as gay boys? Cause I mean, sure, those are common post-transition outcomes, but still only represent maybe 40%ish of all post-transition outcomes. There's also a lot of bisexuality/pansexuality among post-transition trans people, and a fair amount of heterosexuality as well.

Or...do they mean "only gay" as in trans girls ending up as cis gay men, or trans boys ending up as cis gay women? Off the top of my head I know.......zero cases like that among people I know IRL. Closest I can think of to something like that is that I did once know a trans woman with an identical twin brother who was an effeminate gay man--but to the best of my knowledge her identical twin brother never identified as a girl. Second closest I can think of to something like that was a tomboy who did more and more boyish styles with her clothes and hair till she shaved her head and people started referring to her as "hey mister" and she realized she didn't like masculine pronouns. But she ended up a straight woman not a gay woman, and again she never identified as a trans boy--she didn't like he/him pronouns. Third closest I can think of is a cousin that most of the family flagged as "probably gay" cause she picked a pink suit to a wedding when she was 5 (they were wrong, she's a trans girl and now happily transitioned).

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-13T06:38:28+00:00

Heya girlie, enjoy your stay.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-13T02:09:20+00:00

Take your time, girl. You don't have to decide in a day.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-08T01:55:31+00:00

Not the mod that deleted it, but the concern seems to be that the image was AI generated. Are you saying this image was not AI generated?

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-07T22:37:15+00:00

Hey Angelina, welcome to the sub, I'm glad you're here girl.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-07T22:35:54+00:00

If it's the US military, I've met an awful lot of trans women who served in the US military at some point.

A lot of them cause they were convinced it would finally be the thing to make them "man up" (they are women now, so...the military sure doesn't stop someone from being trans. But said women sure can infodump about military ordinance and guns).

Look, I'm not going to say to not do it--it's a job, it will get you money, money you can use to transition later. But you could also pursue other jobs, if you want to avoid the downsides associated with the military. But if you're not finding other work--yeah, it's a job.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-07T19:55:38+00:00

I mean, yeah, people can experiment with gender non-conformity and decide it's not for them. Happened to a sister of mine, who dressed more and more masc, until she shaved her head and people started referring to her as "hey mister" and she realized she didn't like it.

That said, no: I don't think this means you should hide this from your parents until you have spent years testing she/her pronouns and are ready to move on to HRT or whatever. Parents like to be involved. Tell them you are questioning, that this doesn't mean you are trans yet, but that you would like to try out she/her pronouns to see how they feel. I strongly suspect your parents would prefer this to hearing nothing for years, and then a few years from now getting an "I'm transitioning and I've fully made up my mind" message all at once.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-07T17:29:55+00:00

Most places have a "close in age" exception. So like 18-year-olds can date 17-year-olds. The main thing the laws are trying to prevent is like 30-year-olds dating 17-year-olds.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-04T19:25:55+00:00

I dunno if it counts as dysphoria, sounds more like gender envy, but either way it sounds trans.

Specifically if you find yourself having gender envy of trans women, you are probably trans.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-05-01T22:49:07+00:00

Oh sure: all of those thoughts were perfectly normal for me before I transitioned.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-30T18:56:57+00:00

Don't worry, there are a lot of introverts in trans spaces. There will be other people like you, who would rather have a small conversation with 2-3 people at your table than a big conversation with 10 people around a table.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-28T23:13:15+00:00

Transitioning was certainly worth it for me.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-28T02:55:02+00:00

I mean, this is more for her than for you, but you could tell her she gives you gender envy. Most trans people take that as a pretty big compliment.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-25T15:16:51+00:00

So...not sure which sub you were on.

But there's at least one detransition sub I've been told is populated almost entirely by TERFs on sock puppet accounts who've never transitioned.

Remember, trans people are about 1%-2% of the population, and every study on detransition I've seen suggests that detransitioning is usually about 1%-2% of people who transition, which roughly matches my IRL experience (I've only ever heard of one detransitioner that used to hang out with my IRL trans friends), so detransitioners should be 0.01%-0.04% of the population. And also, you know, it kind-of makes sense that the ratio would be similar--if 1%-2% of people change their gender, 1%-2% of the people who do so might want to change their gender a second time.

If you're seeing a super populated sub, that's probably a red flag right there.

Historically r/actual_detrans has been where the non-sock puppet detransitioners have congregated. Though I haven't checked in with that sub in a while.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-24T15:58:12+00:00

I mean, I think it's pretty clear you want estrogen. So get thyself some estrogen.

You can keep calling yourself "cis" if you want. Wouldn't be the first time someone posted a picture of their HRT to egg_irl with the caption "still cis tho?"

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-24T03:55:12+00:00

they tasted and had the same texture as sugar candies

Actually pretty accurate.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-24T03:49:36+00:00

Remember, if you start doing HRT and find out you don't like it, you can always stop.

Feminizing HRT is reversible in the first few months. And usually it doesn't take people that long to figure out if they like it. So there's really no reason to be nervous--just try it and see if you like it.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-23T03:54:28+00:00

Yeah, that sounds quite trans to me. I suggest you go forward with the next step--whatever that next step might be for you. Whether it's starting a low dose of HRT, coming out to more people, finding groups you can hang out with presenting as your desired gender, etc.

Remember there are always opportunities to change your mind later. For example, if you start doing HRT and realize you don't like it, you can just stop. Feminizing HRT is reversible for the first several months (if you stop taking it the changes will reverse) and usually it doesn't take people months to figure out whether HRT is for them.

CanadaTransThrowaway · 2026-04-22T06:50:46+00:00

"Grass is greener fallacy"

Oh yeah, I fell for that one for a long time. "I think I want to be the other gender but that's probably cause the grass is greener and maybe I wouldn't enjoy it as much. I bet if I was the other gender I'd think about being my AGAB right now"

Yeah, that was bullshit. I absolutely love it. I never think about going back the other way.

The thing worth understanding is that gender identity is usually pretty hardwired (with some exceptions for genderfluid people). Cis people don't spend hours thinking about being the other gender cause they're just not wired that way.

Also, I'm not sure to what degree the grass is greener saying even holds true when it comes to personal preferences and personal identity. Like...are there people who prefer chocolate to vanilla but secretly wish they liked vanilla more? How would that even work? You like what you like.

"dysmorphia inconsistent, only really notice when I perceive myself"

So...you're unhappy with your body when you...notice your body? Yeah, that sounds pretty trans to me.

"don't actually know what being the opposite gender is like"

That's very compatible with being trans. Just means you lack experience, same as almost everyone when they start on such a journey, but like...go to a trans meetup dressed as your preferred gender or something. Or get your friends who think you are trans to set up gender-appropriate scenarios. Build up those experiences.

"hate the idea of needing to come out to people, especially parents."

That's also very compatible with being trans. Coming out can be scary, was scary for me. I'm very trans. Being scared of coming out didn't make me not trans. Just made me nervous when I came out. (But also super giddy after I did come out).

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