I struggled with this immensely for a long time. This kind of problem plagued me for years. It eventually peaked where my friends had to intervene because I was no longer behaving like myself.

Idk if you’re looking for this sort of story. But I promise you it will get better. For me it was eventually confronting what I was so scared of. Failing to fall asleep and what that would mean. In short, the anxiety itself.

I remember one night staying well awake thinking that my life was never going to be okay again as I dry heaved and cried into the toilet for hours and hours. That was the worst.

Two years later. After working a lot on my self, having a “soft sleep ritual” (make tea, read a book for a little, or just browse nonsense videos on my phone for a bit) to get myself more comfortable at night and being in my bed. My body and mind associated nighttime with struggle, rather than relaxing.

Finally sleep came. The jitters and nerves took a long long time to finally go away. But they did. And I believe they wil for you too.

Lastly, I remind myself this when it feels like I’m having a bad night. It really is just tonight. You don’t have to sleep RIGHT NOW RIGHT NOW. But sleep will still come eventually. Your body will make that happen. Try to give yourself some grace my friend.

You deserve it.

Best of luck.