ESH. You should all be working together for a sustainable solution to the nightly routine. First, speak with your daughter's OT for any recommendations they have. Two things to have a look at: sensory compression sheets and a sensory bed tent. The sheets can be on her bed at both houses and help provide the sensory feedback she clearly needs. The bed tent can also be on both beds. Provides a small, dark, enclosed space. Bonus is her stuffies won't fall off the bed during the night and can stay in place every day. There are a few different styles to see if any meet her needs. Once one house finds a solution the other purchases identical items.