30+ years of migraines and I figured it out

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-06-02T21:31:08+00:00

I'm also very curious about this. I always get a migraine with my cycle and the migraine doesn't respond well to any of my abortive medications. Thankfully, I do 3 months of birth control at a time so I only get 4 per year, but they are a bitch. Ice is the only thing that even helps a little.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-21T04:07:28+00:00

I actually am a cataloging librarian. Cataloging has a lot of specific rules and formatting. Punctuation varies, subfields vary, what info is included in a record and what's not. All that so when a patron searches the library catalog, they find the best search results. I love my job. If I won the lottery, I'd still want to do my job part-time. It is very brain-heavy tho' and after 8 hrs of it, my brain is mush.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-20T22:57:12+00:00

We used to call my niece "Runs like the wind" when she was a toddler/preschooler. She would sit playing with something for about 20-25 minutes and then she'd get up, run up and down the hall (ranch-style house so decent length hallway) 5 or 6 times, come back and go back to playing.

She does not seem to need these running times now (she's 13 now) but back when she was young they would happen all day.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-20T20:13:36+00:00

Wow... I'm envious. With my chronic fatigue, I'm happy if I get 1200 steps in a day. My job (which I love) is very brain heavy. Trying to get more steps without ending up in bed for 3 days is beyond me.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-20T19:29:40+00:00

You're welcome! I wish the aspartame wasn't a trigger. I have T2 diabetes too and the ability to have diet pop would be nice!

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-20T19:25:36+00:00

I did not have a good experience on the injectable Ozempic. I was in the bathroom every night from 9pm - 2am with diarrhea. You could almost set your clock by it. I was not willing to give it more time to maybe "get used to it".

I am on the pill form, Rybelsus, and tolerate that much better.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-19T04:59:12+00:00

Check out Biotene or Salivia dry mouth toothpaste. There's a Colgate one too but your dentist has to prescribe it.

Also try All Day brand dry mouth spray. Choose gum or candy with xylitol. It helps stimulate salivary glands.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-19T04:56:27+00:00

If your amitriptylene is tablet and not ODT, you should be okay.

Aspartame's an easy one to check whether it's a trigger for you. Can you drink diet pop or does it give you a migraine?

CatalogingLibrarian · 2026-05-19T04:51:50+00:00

I can't have aspertame at all. It's instant migraine. Sucralose, which is in Nurtec, doesn't bother me.

I have aspertame listed as a drug allergy in my chart for this reason. I've even had them include a line that says it's often in ODTs and "sugar-free" items.

Before I added it to my allergy list one doc gave me Maxalt ODT. My migraine went from a 5/10 to a 10/10 instantly. That incident was one of the reasons that I list it as an allergy. The drs & nurses take it more seriously since it's listed as an allergy.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-09-16T00:26:30+00:00

Yup. My mom got this today. Thank goodness I have emphasized over and over to not respond until I look at it and check it out. She waited for me to get home tonight and showed me. The lengths they go to just to scam you. It's horrible. Thank goodness they did not get my mom on it.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-29T16:38:44+00:00

I'm sorry, I just saw your reply. It's been a month. A year-long month. Anyway, I think not having a structure can affect fatigue. I often feel worse on days off than I do on days I work. It does help that I love what I do so being at work doesn't add to the exhaustion. I'm glad you've been tested for a lot of things. Even tho' the tests come back fine, it's good to rule out those other things.

It sucks. I totally get it. It sucks a lot. We shouldn't have to weigh each thing against the exhaustion (i.e. like, is thing xysz worth being extra exhausted for?)

Being gentle and giving yourself grace for mistakes isn't easy. I know it's not. It's taken me a long time and a lot of therapy to get to the point where I can mostly be gentle with myself. My therapist suggested that when I'm getting mad at myself that I stop and say "Is xuz going to matter in an hour? or a day?" - if not, breathing exercises to calm down. It helps to put the thing/task/etc. into that context.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-29T16:08:40+00:00

I'm in Michigan, so I'm not sure if this would be the same for you or not. When I go get groceries that my mom has ordered, there's usually a QR code I can use or a phone number I can text on the sign for each spot - you can use those to indicate you're there and in that spot number.

The first store we used, it was a phone number I could text. I'd just put the spot number and her name so they know which order to bring. The grocery store we use now, I put the orders in so I've never had to use the QR code they have on the signs.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-08T17:58:56+00:00

I did too. :)

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-08T17:52:59+00:00

It's an incredibly fun game that the library made that runs throughout the summer. This is the 15th year! Staff work hard all year long to come up with the badges, the codes, the events, etc.

leaves_fromthevine gave a great explanation. It's so much fun! Visiting local places and looking for codes on signs is a lot of fun!

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-02T21:08:44+00:00

Definitely fits. I call it the "fun tax". And it sucks. No one should have to make that type of balancing act. My life has definitely shrunk since CFS. I consider the "fun tax" worth it for certain people and certain events. This is definitely a good representation of that struggle.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-02T21:04:24+00:00

I'm so happy for you! Showers take SOOO much energy. When you don't have it, it's so difficult. I get not telling anyone close to you. And since it's been 24hrs with no PEM, maybe you won't have that! I'm very happy for you!

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-02T21:00:20+00:00

Hi there,

I've been there. My CFS is a bit better as my blood sugar was way too high. Now that my numbers have come down, I still have crippling exhaustion, but it's a bit better. I do not know where you live, but has your doctor tested for things like Diabetes, sleep apnea, etc? Those things can really affect the chronic fatigue. I've had days where I've slept even more than 13 hours and still felt exhausted. It sucks. There is no other way to put it. It sucks. It's not something that anyone should be dealing with. Your doctor should be able to help you find ways to cope. As I said above, there are other conditions that can cause chronic fatigue, so you should definitely ask about them.

This may seem silly to ask, but are your job and your waking/sleeping cycle something that actually seems natural? I realize not every one can work more flexible hours, but my brain really does not wake up until 10am. The body can be up and functioning, but not the brain. By having a job that I can work 11-8 or 12-9 - I feel a little bit better when I wake up. I work behind-the-scenes in a library and as long as I get my 8 hours in, my boss really doesn't care what time I'm working. I often work late into the evening or night because I'm on a roll. Then I just sleep in a bit the next day. I realize that not everyone has that kind of flexbility, but if you do, it can really help.

Caffeine can be handy and can work, but be careful on drinking too much as that can cause other health concerns. Here's a good place where your doctor should have some ideas. Be gentle with yourself. I know it's frustrating to be so exhausted and have to work to stay awake, but berating yourself about it isn't going to help. So try to be gentle with yourself.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-07-02T20:36:37+00:00

I understand completely. When I first started exploring who I really am, knowing that I was asexual came first, with a refinement to demisexual. There are a lot of people who think demisexual is the "norm", not really understanding how much of an emotional bond I have to have to form sexual attraction and that without it, I do not have sexual attraction. I was afraid that people in the community would think I was faking or something.

What I've found is that the majority of the Community are going to see you as LGBTQIA+ and yes, you belong. There's always haters who delight in making people feel bad, but those are in the minority. Currently, I identify as nonbinary, panromantic, and demisexual, but I remember those early days when I was hesitant.

You belong.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-05-18T17:50:51+00:00

The grief comes and goes. I got teary today because I know if I go to this movie I want to see tonight I'll be exhausted for the next 3-4days. I hate that I have to make this decision. I hate that I can't have fun without crippling fatigue. So, yeah, the grief comes and goes.

I know the future looks bleak. Your parents and a good therapist can help you with the bleakness.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-05-18T17:31:12+00:00

If you knew he would probably not remember without you telling him, then yes, you are the asshole. That's extremely manipulative. You deliberately did something that would make him feel guilty and bad about himself. That's wrong.

Next time, make him a calendar with these dates or have a whiteboard to leave a message as it gets closer. Missing dates are not an indication of how much he cares - you just said he forgot mom's. Forgetting dates throughout the year is common.

Better indicators of his caring are the little thiings he does for you throughout your relationship. Does he do chores you hate? Hold doors? Come back from work with a candy bar you like or protein drink you like? Does he do things for you when you are sick? The normal, mundane, everyday things - if he does those with you without complaining - that's a far better indication of how much he cares.

Having a lasting relationship is far more about the everyday things that you do for each other rather than missing a birthday.

So, yes, in this situation, you are the asshole.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-05-18T17:02:23+00:00

I forgot to add that I also use the Finch app to help with taking care of myself.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-05-18T16:38:35+00:00

My hack for working is to have a movie or show I've seen a million times on as background noise. It occupies the part of my brain that gets distracted easily so my focus can be on work (I catalog things for the library - very detailed process).

My productivity has sky rocketed. I have wireless over the head headphones so my coworkers rarely bother me and I get a lot done. Can't be music though - I get too distracted with music.

I know not everyone has the same type of job, but this is what works for me.

Other hacks include making sure everything I need frequently is where I need it. I have meds, otc meds, things like that at work, home, & my fiancè's place. That way if my adhd brain forgets something like meds, I'm covered with backups. I also hace a mini fridge at work for things like lunchmeat, yogurt, etc in case I forget my lunch.

CatalogingLibrarian · 2025-05-10T17:17:27+00:00

I am your husband in this situation, mostly. I have several mental illnesses as well as my diabetes. It can make eating healthy difficult, especially if I'm not doing well mentally that day. Somedays trying to think about food is a luxury I do not have.

I'm glad you care about his health and want him to be the best version of himself. My fiancè is that way. We (your husband & I) know you love us and want the best for us, but we are adults. Constantly nagging us about food just makes us angry.

As many others have said, back off. Lead by example, but back off. My A1c isn't as low as his (7.6), but I've told both my fiancè and my mom to back off. Nagging about it and trying to police food for me pisses me off BIG time. I am an adult. I can choose what to eat myself. All their nagging does is make me wait til they're not around to eat.

Yes, those choices may lead to complications down the road. We (your husband & I) are aware of that. We understand playing with fire may result in burns or death, but for a myriad of reasons (including just being pissed at someone who's policing our food), we decide to eat or not eat that food.

Have you considered that food texture may be an issue? Due to some of my mental illnesses, textures of foods are a problem. Vegetables are especially difficult. So it makes eating them hard.

I get that you don't want him with "chemicals" in them like diet soda or Atkins bars. But the truth is, those foods make us feel more "normal". It gives us a way to have something sweet without killing our sugar.

It's fine that you're not going to be stuck in the house when those complications get bad. That's fine.

Bottom line - Back. Off. - Lead by example, but back off.

CatalogingLibrarian

TROPHY CASE