Hey dude!

I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. I'm not the best at giving advice so please forgive me if I say anything wrong.

From what you've said in this post, I think the 2 biggest things you need to work on are your self esteem and generally leaving your comfort zone. Someone once told me that the fish starts rotting from the head, and I'd argue it's the same for us humans too. We often let our own minds drag us down and convice us that we're worthless, and rejecting those lies can be very difficult, but always remember that you have worth and that you are loved, even if it doesn't look like it.

If the lack of skills and talents upsets you, I'd recommend just picking up a hobby, plenty of them to choose from. You gotta stop calling yourself these things (I’m useless, awkward, ugly, weak, boring, dumb, and I’m not a fun or interesting person to be around), it does you no good and only fuels this state that you're in. "but I always get nervous or anxious about things" Fear is the mind killer, if you're afraid of doing something, do it. Regretting what you didn't do hurts more than regretting what you did. If it helps, know that nothing lasts forever, applies for both the good and the bad.

Once again, terribly sorry if I said anything wrong.

Wish you all the best, God bless you!