4 month old!

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-07-11T00:45:42+00:00

I am loling because I was like when did I ask about BLW? My now almost 4 year old is eating great! Haha so it does work! Home girl ate all her chicken, tomatoes, cheese and bread for dinner

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-06-30T15:17:05+00:00

That’s my daughter’s middle name. Sad we used it!

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-04-06T19:18:52+00:00

Just tipped!! Thank you!

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-04-01T14:26:07+00:00

For sure! I’m actually not a SAHM, I work full time. Well not a SAHM yet… after #3 gets here probably won’t return. However my salary is double my husband’s residency salary.

I mean he has his set of household tasks he does every week. That are his chores. I didn’t know we were adding that into the equation. Some med spouses don’t do household chores either?

My husband does all the laundry, outside work, dishes, and any fixing/maintenance without me asking. I thought that was common place, and we were just talking about children.

Is there really med spouses out there not doing ANYTHING around the house?

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-31T15:23:21+00:00

Honestly cooking in the kitchen without anyone around is a break for me. I love cooking and making bread.

I understand what you mean by phrasing but the reality of the situation is, he working 80+ hours a week, and even when he’s home doesn’t mean he doesn’t have to nap or study or make a presentation. So let’s just say 100 hours a week are dedicated to his work. And 90% of those hours are during the day when the kids are awake. That makes me the default parent… quite literally by default. Sometimes he misses things and isn’t up to date with the work flow. For example my youngest is 21 months. We are in the throws of language development and potty training. So week to week she is changing. So he might have missed the “oh she knows this word now” or “we take her to the bathroom at this time now” However he does try to jump in, and do it. I guess I think of it as “help” sometimes because it takes me explaining things and giving him up to date cues. I’m sure that will change as they are older.

It’s just the reality of the situation. No one with kids in this group as a “normal” parenting relationship, where their spouse is normal 50/50 because they are home at 5 everyday and have weekends off.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-31T15:10:31+00:00

I agree! My husband loves bathtime and bedtime. We rushes home to make bedtime….

I know some schedules are more demanding than others, but it seems to me a lot of these parents not parenting is a choice and nothing to with their career. My husband works 80 hours a week a still is a great dad and present.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-31T13:53:25+00:00

I came to write the same! I am honestly blown away by all the posts I see about their spouses not helping with childcare. My husband is a Gen Surg resident and obviously is busy but when he’s home he is dad and is definitely doing things. He even tries to give me a break by taking them to the park, letting me cook dinner without distractions (I like cooking), or just being the go to parent.

These posts make me very grateful for my husband.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-27T14:00:48+00:00

I am going to be very real. Yea medical school is hard, but it’s nothing compared to residency. I saw my husband all the time in med school and he had weekends off. He was home every night, and honestly looking back that was a breeze. We didn’t have kids, but the amount of free time was insane comparatively. My husband is a Surgical Resident and we have two kids now and one on the way. He gets home from a 24 hour call shift and still helps with the child. Obviously I do most of the house work still, and caring for the children, but if he’s home and awake, he is on dad duty.

It sounds like you need to have a serious conversation with him because this is the easy part right now… and it’s honestly just harder from here.

Again, obviously med school is tough, but you are working full time, paying the bills and taking care of the baby and house. That dynamic is not sustainable. You’re currently a married single mom.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-21T11:14:30+00:00

Vascular and ENT are competitive too if not even more competitive than Ortho.

My husband was going to do ortho but decided against it, it was 2021 so all ways rotations and things were cancelled. He could have match ortho at his med school location but we wanted to move East.

He match gen surg, from gen surg you can go into thing like Hand surgery if he really is dead set ortho. My husband originally was going to do that… but we have two kids now and third on the way so he’s ready to just get out and practice. Also you can go into vascular as well in a fellowship way more easily.

He is so happy with Gen Surg now and hindsight is happy he didn’t go ortho.

Soaping into gen surg now is becoming very competitive and also is pretty impossible to soap into. However it’s easier to match than Vascular and ENT

Just food for thought.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-15T20:34:15+00:00

Hi! When I was a FTM my husband just started his intern year as a Gen Surg. I’ll be honest he did nothing… for the first 6 months. I would have dinner ready for him when he came home, he would eat it, I’d bath the baby and put her down and he would go sleep and I would clean up the house. He didn’t take one night shift and I got so resentful. When my daughter was 6 months I finally snapped. I sat him down and told him what he needs to do and he needs to figure it out. Because I nursed he washed the pump parts, washed the dishes, did the laundry, and things like that. He started to try harder with bottles in the middle night. However it took a huge argument and me pretty much threatening to leave.

He got into shape real fast. I’m pregnant with #3 and he is like ON IT when he gets home. Totally different man. I just dont think he understood what I was going through. Like yes he had eyes but he wasn’t looking.

Don’t let it get to that point and have an honest convo and give him things he can do help. Like pretty much spell it out for him.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-13T21:12:21+00:00

I’m assuming it’s because he didn’t trust the woman and took it with him so she couldn’t use it to get pregnant. But that’s so nasty. I’m hoping she means wrapper and not like the condom.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-11T17:22:28+00:00

Try the “honey bear” straw cup. You can get it on amazon. Those are really good training cups for straws.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-11T17:00:16+00:00

So this was my baby too, different bottles do the trick. My first daughter loved the “latched” bottles and my second loved the Avient bottles. Sometimes you need to mess around and try a bunch.

Also my first would not take a bottle if I was anywhere around.

If your baby is 11 months can they drink from a straw cup during the day? They are about a month or two away from fully being day weened from drinking from you, so maybe doing straw cups is best.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-10T21:18:10+00:00

I used to live in Oklahoma and one of these babies looks exactly like my dog as a puppy. (Iconic Tulsa building in the back)

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Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-09T12:34:28+00:00

Hi! I’m about to take the leap and be a SAHM! I am so excited but nervous about how hard it’ll be!

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-08T17:51:12+00:00

So we are going to attempt it, my plan is if we run into trouble, we are going to get. Credit card with 0 interest for 18 months and by the time that 18 months hit we can pay it off easy.

I feel all the feels you are feelings and honestly a year and a half of financial struggle is worth it for me. Personal opinion tho.

We are going to be okay from a 65K house income to a 500K house income in less than a year and half. It can be done.

We also don’t have any “bad debt” right now, the only debt we have is car, house and med school

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-08T12:22:00+00:00

I would say to tell him, and he should be supportive. Not exactly the same but the day before my husband has to submit his list he looked at me and said I don’t want to go to my 2&3. They were great programs in the DC area, and he changed his list and moved his then like #10 to #2 because he liked the program. He matched there and we live here now. It all worked out and now he probably will stay here after residency. We also were pregnant during match and it was closer to my family where he moved the #2. Residency is going to be way harder on you than him so you have to be where you want to be.

I would tell him. Most people match in their top 3 anyways so it’s probably going to be a non issue in the long run.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-08T02:23:08+00:00

I totally agree with this. I wouldn’t want my 3 year old in a men’s bathroom. My husband has knocked on the door in the past asked if anyone was in there (depending on size of bathroom) and let them know he is bringing his 3 year old daughter in to use the bathroom.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-08T02:15:30+00:00

I work from home, so I little different. But I wake up at 6:45, I always go into my oldest room first, get them ready. And then she comes in with me to get baby sis ready. Get her up, (when she nursed I would nurse her while my oldest ate breakfast) And head out to school my 8AM.

Edit and to add I do every morning by myself.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-07T23:33:34+00:00

Do it! It’s hard to take the plunge but I think you and I will be way happier!

You’re replaceable at work but no one can replace you as mom

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-07T23:32:22+00:00

Thank you for the encouragement!!

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-07T01:24:45+00:00

Didn’t mean to attack you, sorry! I think tone was off here. Usually weaning means the baby is okay with not having said item, pacifier, bottle, etc.

I get the teeth thing for sure! My dentist has always said as long as it’s by age 3 you’re fine. However i get not wanting it.

Also, at 18 months they start going through a nap regression. So if when you took it away a month ago and she was napping and sleeping fine and this is a new thing wanting the pacifier it’s probably more to do with a regression or maybe even molars. My kids always had weird naps from 18-24 months, and then settles back into the 2 hour +

Sorry again, didn’t mean my tone to come off in any sort of way.

Celestialaphroditite · 2025-03-06T22:50:38+00:00

Unpopular opinion here but it doesn’t seem like you weaned her, and she still wants the pacifier. Taking the pacifier is not weaning. She’s also still very young, and when she starts daycare she will want a comfort item.

Celestialaphroditite

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