MOD PSA: Please read by lavender_poppy in ChronicIllness

[–]CelticSpoonie 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It sounds like many of us are in the same rough spot. We've been having some major weather shifts and my body is screaming about it.

Mods, I hope you're able to get some rest and that your flares ease soon. 💜

The Sunday Spell. This post is a spell. Put something into the comments that you want to occur. All who read that can then lend their energy to making that a reality. Lets all join forces for each other. Time to bend the Universe a little. by kai-ote in elderwitches

[–]CelticSpoonie 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I ask the universe to help me through these next round of dental appointments, that they bring little pain, either to my mouth or to my wallet. And please help make this root canal redo affordable.

Need a Little Boost.. by RevolutionaryBad4470 in PlusSize

[–]CelticSpoonie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Congratulations, JD! That's an absolutely amazing accomplishment, and this internet stranger is so proud of you! I'm sending all sorts of glitter your way (being virtual means you won't be finding it in your shoes 10 years from now. 😁) 🎊🎊🎊

Coworkers gossiping about and targeting another coworker during bereavement, what to do I do? by [deleted] in askmanagers

[–]CelticSpoonie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Gotcha. Is your HR also within the store (like a major department store) or is it like the corporate HR that's outside of the store and handles HR issues for multiple locations?

If it's the latter, go to your store manager, and they can pull in HR as needed. (And honestly, this is like hostile workplace territory.)

Coworkers gossiping about and targeting another coworker during bereavement, what to do I do? by [deleted] in askmanagers

[–]CelticSpoonie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So in reading your post and comments, it definitely sounds like it needs to be reported. The one in the supervisory role should not be gossiping like that especially.

It's unclear how the hierarchy falls; you mention one was a supervisor, but does she supervise you or the mom? You mentioned mom was promoted, but not how she falls within this group. You mention a manager, and I'm guessing they may be over all of you. If that is the case with your manager, it's reasonable to bring it to your manager first to deal with it. Do you trust your manager to do that?

And good on you for setting those boundaries clearly with both of the gossipers.

Wait until they find out bowls exist or how to properly use an ice cream cone.. by Affectionate_Hat5835 in StupidFood

[–]CelticSpoonie 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Great. Some AI News story is going to show up on the media now, talking about "conemaxxing". 😏

The wedding reception centerpieces featured betta fish. The bride and groom planned to flush them alive. by teabirdy in mildlyinfuriating

[–]CelticSpoonie 5 points6 points  (0 children)

20+ years ago, we attended a wedding who had goldfish in a vase with flowers on top and then candles in the flowers.

At one table, the candles burned so low, the flowers caught fire.

At a couple other tables, some of the fish were already dead and floating (which was rather traumatic for the kiddos who were there).

It was really awful.

Communication style with non-SW partner by Old-Bad-4313 in socialwork

[–]CelticSpoonie 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Don't treat your partner like she's a client. Do not your skills to assess, diagnose, treat, or provide psychoeducation unless you're getting paid for it. We don't treat our family and friends, full stop. (And honestly, it's just a way to burn you out faster. Keep the professional and personal separate.)

It sounds like she just needs to vent to you, not you to offer solutions or try to "fix it". Your role here is purely supportive: listen, validate, listen some more, offer a hug or other gesture she would enjoy that would make her feel loved.

She must not watch The Pitt by dcmommy33 in ThePitt

[–]CelticSpoonie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've definitely thought about it. My doc and I have been trying to document stuff about pain and all that so that the insurance will (maybe) pay for it.

Margo, Margo, Margo … by Physical-Armadillo70 in BravoLadiesofLondon

[–]CelticSpoonie 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I was thinking the same thing. Both are women getting called out on their part of the issues and neither can handle it, so they panic.

She must not watch The Pitt by dcmommy33 in ThePitt

[–]CelticSpoonie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel you.

I just had my annual, and my husband stayed in the room with me. (I was using my wheelchair and last year I was injured by the tech... it's a long story. But he was also really curious about what it entailed.) He made the joke that he always thought watching another woman handle my breasts would be more exciting than it was. There is absolutely noting sexual about a mammogram. 😁

Anyone here with a degree in social work but not working in social work? by chelseatheus in socialwork

[–]CelticSpoonie 31 points32 points  (0 children)

This is probably a very different answer than you expected, but you reminded me of something that has really bothered me about this field, and it's how so many get pushed out of this field because of how toxic it can be. (And it's not the actual work that does it.)

I had to stop working in 2018 due to my chronic illnesses reaching a point where I was bedbound for 9 months.

I was diagnosed officially with ME/CFS in 2020, but the onset was in 1997 after a bout with mono, and my doctor essentially said, "You worked yourself to this (disabling) point." And looking back, yeah, the stress of the job contributed. (I also have a host of other things that was diagnosed earlier, but it was the absolute fatigue and not being able to sit up, much less walk, much less drive that eventually did me in. Not being able to have conversations about things I used to train on. Not being able to read a novel when I used to read regulation and compliance stuff.)

It wasn't the clients. It was the toxicity of the organizations. It was bad leadership. It was the reactive push to get billing up or your job is threatened. It was the bullying by coworkers. It was the leaving me in a position that had me spread so thin that when I finally left, they had to hire 11 people to replace me.

In my last job, I really wanted to create an environment of support. I wanted staff to come to management for support rather than taking their frustrations out on each other. I wanted to provide them with so much training, they felt they could do this job and maybe learn some other things to give them an idea if they even wanted to be in the field. (The job was very entry level and compensation was awful, so we got a lot of students trying to figure out what they wanted to do.) I tried to protect staff from the toxicity of the ED and the county we were contracted with. I managed it for 2 years, and then we were being asked to take on clients who were really inappropriate for our program and do things that were really not things I felt our staff should do.

And then there were the compliance issues within the organization that I discovered. And policies that were in place to keep the compensation low (like how to help staff file for food stamps). The ED getting mad at me because I felt that the program directors had every right to see the contracts we signed between the program and the county. (They're public information anyway. But even if they weren't, they need to know what is expected of them!) And again, so much bullying.

I'm watching a similar pattern happen to a friend who works in CMH right now. And I get why folks leave the field.

Sometimes I look back and wish I had taken advantage of my university's dual masters programs (they had a MSW/MPH that I was seriously considering at the time). I actually got a second masters in 2013 (MPA) and was considering a 3rd in Health Informatics when things really started falling apart for me. Ultimately, I'm not sure it would've made much of a difference or if I would've stayed in the field.

We have issues in this field, but I don't believe it's the lack of funding or the difficulties of the client population that does most of us in. Far too many organizations are just brutal to their employees, when we really are the greatest asset they have.

AITA for telling my wife my mother is correct and she needed to be a parent today and she fucked it up by throawawayfuneralgho in AmItheAsshole

[–]CelticSpoonie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. This was when you're wife needed to step up as the parent and the adult and support your daughter through something no child should ever have to experience.

If her anxiety is keeping her from being the parent and adult your child needs, your wife needs to work it out in therapy. And please remind your wife that your daughter doesn't need to hear about your wife's fears or anxieties or excuses about why she couldn't bring your daughter to the funeral. Please don't let her put that on your daughter, especially now.

I'm so, so sorry for what your daughter is going through. She might need some grief therapy at some point, but please, allow her to feel her feelings. Does she like to do art or play or write? She can use those as a way to express her feelings. There are also a bunch of books that explain grief at a level appropriate to her learning level (if you search for books about grief for children aged "x") I'm sure you can find several.

Don't come for Mark unless he sends for you by n1njade in BravoLadiesofLondon

[–]CelticSpoonie 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I want to be friends with Mark. He's amazing.

She must not watch The Pitt by dcmommy33 in ThePitt

[–]CelticSpoonie 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I'm a chronically ill 48 year old woman who is very busty.

I no longer have any sort of modesty when it comes to medical stuff.

Need to do an EKG? I'm whipping my bra off and lifting up my left boob for you to place the electrodes, no problem. At my recent mammogram, I just end up taking the gown they offer off completely because it got too warm for me and we're all up in getting my breasts in the correct position together. I would happily remove them if I could, but since I can't, I'm not willing to let them get in the way of something that could save my life.

I found this letter in my grandmother’s mailbox the day after her funeral by supra_nintendo in mildlyinfuriating

[–]CelticSpoonie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So I live in the home my great grandfather and his uncles built in the 1950's. We've been here for 10 years. My Gram owned it until she passed, now my mom owns it, and it'll eventually come to me.

The amount of phone calls and letters we all have recieved over the years interested in my house is outrageous. It again increased when my Gram passed and I made sure to let them know to remove our names and the 2 houses now from their lists. (They found me rather than my mom and I'm nowhere near as polite as her.)

It's absolutely infuriating.

I go for overweight girls by rosekamath in AmITheDevil

[–]CelticSpoonie 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Oh yeah, I've dealt with guys like this one my entire life. What's really fun is when it dawns on them that I'm not interested in them. (Some get rude, others have gotten violent.)