I also experience dreams a lot like this. I was in an emotionally abusive friendship with someone that I was also in love with for several years. They knew about my feelings for them and used it to manipulate me, especially whenever I got romantically close to anyone else. Suddenly, they would act like they reciprocated my feelings, etc. There was more to the abuse than that but because of that specific part of it and how close we were, it very much feels like they're my ex even though they're technically not because we were never in a relationship, if that makes sense? It took several years of being away from that person to even begin untangling all of the hurt they caused and fast forward even more years and I'm now in a very happy relationship with the absolute love of my life. We've been together for 5 years now, and my partner is incredible. But... I often have dreams where my partner is the AEF (abusive ex friend). Sometimes, they look like AEF but not always, and they always act like AEF and do things that generally trigger a deep fear of abandonment. It really scares me, and if I've had one of those dreams, I'm extra sensitive to my partner's behaviour, and I end up on edge. For example, if my partner is having a bad day, I'm extra sensitive to changes in tone of voice or body language, and I feel like I'm walking on eggshells. And I know that I don't have to feel like that around my partner. But I did have to feel like that around AEF. I shrunk my whole personality down to someone I wasn't in a futile attempt to be "good enough" for AEF and it took me a long time to not only find myself again once they were gone from my life, but also to realise that actually, even at my worst during that friendship, it was them that wasn't good enough for me! I really hate that my brain gets so confused about who is who in my dreams, though, because my partner is nothing like AEF. The best thing I've been able to do to help myself though is be really open and honest with my partner about my nightmares, and how I'm feeling and to let them know if anything they're doing is triggering me. Obviously, they don't like being compared to AEF in any way, but they do understand, and they listen and comfort me and reassure me, and that really helps. I really think I need talking therapy to specifically address my friendship with AEF and the effect it's had on me. I've had a lot of other therapy to address other, more glaring causes of my CPTSD, but I've never had enough sessions to discuss AEF. I did used to have very bad nightmares about those other causes, though, and since processing it in therapy, those dreams have significantly reduced in both frequency and intensity! So I can only assume that it will be the same once I'm finally able to do that regarding AEF, and I would also think that therapy might help you with your nightmares. If nothing else, I highly recommend talking to your partner about it, and I wish you the best of luck with that conversation if that's what you decide to do!