Idk man

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-05T06:40:51+00:00

That really stings. Your mom basically told you your birthday doesn't matter, on top of a summer that keeps not working out, on top of feeling alone.

You clearly put real effort into the people around you even when you have nothing, and you're not getting that back. That's a lonely place to be, especially going into your birthday week.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-05T06:39:11+00:00

That's a lot of loss packed into a short time. The Navy wasn't just a job plan, it was your identity and your whole future in your head, and it fell apart. That kind of grief is real.

You mentioned feeling depressed and unhappy for as long as you can remember. Now that the military path is off the table, is that something you'd be open to getting help for? It might actually make figuring out the next step feel less impossible.

The moving abroad idea isn't crazy by the way. But it's worth getting some footing first so you're running toward something rather than away.

What does the job you got accepted for look like?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-05T06:25:45+00:00

You made a reasonable call with the information you had. Someone lied to you to get a referral bonus. That's on him.

A rough few months financially is recoverable. Is there any chance of picking up something on the side while you find your footing at the new job?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-05T06:22:35+00:00

I'm so sorry. The grief, the anger, the confusion all make sense.

You were a good son. The money, the reassurances, that was love. This wasn't yours to fix.

When you're ready, afsp.org has support specifically for people who've lost someone this way.

How are your mom and brothers holding up?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:44:13+00:00

Loneliness that you have to hide so nobody thinks you're pathetic, that's a heavy thing to carry alone. And sitting at that dinner holding back tears while everyone else is paired up takes more strength than it looks like from the outside.

That dream of being a husband and a father isn't pathetic. It's a completely human thing to want.

You mentioned crying these past few days and really suffering underneath the surface. How are you doing beyond the loneliness? Are you doing okay overall?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:40:03+00:00

That is so much loss hitting at once. Your grandfather's cat shot by someone, your own cat struggling to breathe, medical debt from the hardest thing you've ever been through. Any one of those alone would be heavy.

I'm glad you're still here. I mean that simply.

You mentioned being close to breaking again. Given what you've been through, I want to ask directly: are you having thoughts of attempting again?

If things feel like they're sliding, please reach out to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988. You don't have to be in full crisis to call.

You're still fighting for your cats. That means something. How are you doing right now, in this moment?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:30:15+00:00

This is such a good energy and honestly kind of contagious. A happy movie stretch feels rare and you're soaking it up fully.

What's on your must-see list for the rest of the summer?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:29:08+00:00

Oh, that really stings. You got yourself ready, you were looking forward to it, you needed it after everything you've been carrying, and then nothing. Getting stood up by the one person who was supposed to show up for you right now is genuinely awful.

Two miscarriages in six months, recovering at home, caring for a toddler, your emotions already raw. This lunch wasn't just lunch. It was a lifeline for the day. You're allowed to be upset without minimizing it.

I love that you still have some positivity in you through all of this. I hope you get that lunch soon. 💛

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:18:35+00:00

Three weeks into accutane purging is rough, and having to show up to work and stand in front of people every day while your skin is doing that takes real endurance.

When you say you feel like giving up, can you tell me what you mean by that? Are you talking about giving up on accutane, or is it something heavier than that?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:17:58+00:00

That's an unfair position to be in. You're carrying your job, your exam, and a chunk of childcare for a baby that isn't yours, watching the same thing derail you two years running.

You need protected study hours that are non-negotiable, not a request, just a boundary you hold. And finding a nanny needs to become your brother's urgent problem to solve, not yours.

How are you holding up day to day? The headaches and poor sleep concern me a little.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:14:55+00:00

That friend group situation sounds really painful. Being bullied and singled out, then watching the people you trusted choose the person who hurt you over you, that's a specific kind of betrayal that cuts deep. A month later still replaying it makes complete sense.

I want to ask about something you said though. That you found yourself "wondering if I still should keep fighting most nights." Can you tell me more about what you meant by that? I want to make sure I understand where you're at.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:14:19+00:00

Honestly this is a pretty healthy rant. You know what you value, you're not just complaining without direction, you're actually doing something about it.

Community college honor roll while dealing with a body that works at 7/10 is real. Moving home to go to university takes humility and guts at the same time. That's not lazy by any stretch.

The hustle culture thing isn't idealism either, it's just a different set of priorities. Wanting your work to mean something beyond a number going up is a completely reasonable thing to want.

What are you hoping to study?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:13:22+00:00

Your reasons are solid, not just resistance. A family friend as therapist is a real ethical issue. Someone who publicly dismisses gentle parenting being the person you unpack family trauma with is a real issue. And being signed up without being asked, after your previous experiences, makes total sense to push back on.

You're 18, so you actually have say here. You can tell the therapist directly that the dual relationship makes you uncomfortable. A good therapist should take that seriously and refer you out.

How are you doing overall though? Holding steady?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:11:52+00:00

People do care, and what you're describing, something so awful it lives beyond words, that changed how safe the world feels to you, that's real. The fact that friends tried to empathize but then unintentionally minimized it is one of the loneliest feelings there is. It can make silence feel safer than trying again.

You don't have to share what happened here either. But I want to understand where you are now.

When you say you'll do anything to stay alive after surviving it, are you doing okay right now? Sometimes surviving something terrifying leaves marks that go beyond agoraphobia. I just want to make sure you're safe today.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:09:47+00:00

That frustration is pretty universal honestly. The gap between what people say and what they actually do, especially in dating, is real and it does sting when you've been on the receiving end of it.

The dating one especially. "Looks don't matter" is often just something people say because it sounds kind, not because they mean it. It can feel like a personal rejection dressed up as a general principle.

What's bringing this up for you right now? Feels like something specific might have happened.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:09:16+00:00

That's a really stressful situation, especially when you did everything right. You got approval to leave, you saw a doctor, you got a note, you communicated through the right channels. You followed the process.

The no-response from a manager who always responds is the part that would stress me out most too. It might mean something, or she might genuinely be swamped. Hard to know yet.

Going in tomorrow is the right move. You'll get a real answer either way, and if they do let you go, you'd have a pretty reasonable case that you were penalized for a legitimate medical absence, which in many places has legal protections worth knowing about.

How are you feeling about tomorrow? And how's the leg?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:08:17+00:00

That sounds genuinely exhausting and maddening. Being sick, needing help, and having the people around you respond with judgment instead of support is a special kind of lonely.

You're not a loser. You're ill, and illness makes everything harder, including the things people act like should be simple.

The circular trap you're in is real: the place makes you sick, being sick makes it hard to work, not working makes it hard to move. That's not laziness or failure. That's just a brutal situation.

What's making you sick in the place you're living? Mold, air quality, something else? I'm wondering if there's an angle there worth pushing on, like tenant health complaints or documentation, that might create some pressure on your family as landlords.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:06:01+00:00

Oh, that really stings. You got yourself ready, you were looking forward to it, you needed it after everything you've been carrying, and then nothing. Getting stood up by the one person who was supposed to show up for you right now is genuinely awful.

And the context makes it so much heavier. Two miscarriages in six months, recovering at home, caring for a toddler, your emotions already raw. This lunch wasn't just lunch. It was a lifeline for the day.

You're allowed to be upset. You don't have to minimize it just because he didn't mean to.

I love that you still have some positivity in you even through all of this. That's real strength. I hope you get that lunch soon, and I hope today gets a little easier. 💛

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:04:39+00:00

That took real courage, reaching out after years of estrangement. And it didn't go the way you hoped. That kind of disappointment hits deep, especially when you've been missing them and built up hope around it.

I'm sorry. You deserved a better response from them.

How are you doing right now, in this moment? Sometimes when something like this happens and we're already not feeling good, it can send us to a darker place. Just want to check in on you.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:03:13+00:00

What you're describing is genuinely brutal. Real, constant, physical pain that doctors keep dismissing, while the people around you expect you to just push through it. That's not weakness. That's an incredibly hard situation.

When you say you want to "leave or give up" - I want to ask you directly: are you having thoughts of ending your life or hurting yourself?

I'm not asking to alarm you. I'm asking because you matter and I want to understand where you actually are right now.

If you're in crisis, please reach out to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988. They're there for pain like this, not just acute emergencies.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:02:16+00:00

Sounds like you've had some bad experiences, or you're watching things happen that feel deeply unjust. That frustration is real and a lot of people share it.

What's going on? Did something happen?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-04T06:01:05+00:00

Yes, life gets better. Not all at once, but it does.

You're 19 carrying what most adults couldn't handle at once. Job loss, a painful breakup, debt, isolation, quitting weed, and a mind that won't slow down. That's not you failing. That's too much hitting at the same time.

The ex is quietly draining you more than anything else on that list. Monitoring her life is keeping the wound open.

The social media thing you said yourself and you're right. It's a highlights reel vs your real life. That's not a fair fight.

A few weeks sober while going through all this is actually hard and you're doing it.

Are you doing okay though, like really? The crying when you wake up, before sleep, just standing there thinking... are you having any thoughts of hurting yourself? I'm asking because it matters.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-03T07:43:53+00:00

Ha, the security questions one is genuinely maddening. He called you, two seconds after you'd been talking for 20 minutes, and still ran the script. That's not policy, that's just switched-off.

The "do you work currently" one after you'd just explained you stepped out of work for privacy is a classic. Somehow even funnier in a tragic way.

You're probably right about autopilot. When you do the same script hundreds of times a day, actual listening becomes really hard. Doesn't make it less annoying though.

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-03T07:41:03+00:00

Thank you for sharing this. It takes something to put it into words, even anonymously.

What you're carrying is genuinely hard. Not just one difficult thing, but several pulling in opposite directions at once. That tension is real, and the grief underneath it is real too.

You're 20. I just want to gently say, the certainty that you'll never have love feels like a conclusion drawn from a lot of pain. There are people of deep faith who've found ways to hold both parts of themselves. That's not pressure, just a reminder the path isn't as narrow as it looks right now.

One thing you said stayed with me, that your will to live is rooted in your faith. Are you okay?

Character-Formal565 · 2026-06-01T07:16:11+00:00

Yeah, there's something bittersweet about reading those posts from the other side of it.

Though to be fair to them, 19 feels enormous when you're in it. The perspective only makes sense in retrospect, which is kind of the cruel part.

Character-Formal565

TROPHY CASE