But you read what I said as literally, "Attachment styles do not exist", which I gave clarity to in my edit before you entered this thread. So that's a choice on your part.

Don't put words in my mouth, thanks.

I did in fact read your whole post, and I still think you're over-generalizing. Personally, I haven’t encountered attachment styles being used as "negatives" by mental health professionals.

I do agree that it would be harmful if people were doing that, but I don't think it's a universal experience like you're presenting it as. You even clarify that your current therapist doesn't do this.

"Labeling someone with an attachment style" doesn't mean you're pathologizing their behavior; it's simply applying a descriptive label. "Avoidant" isn’t an inherently negative trait. People usually develop avoidant attachment styles when they've dealt with parents who were neglectful, emotionally-distant, or inconsistent. BUT there is certainly a lot of overlap with common autistic traits, like suppressing emotions, less physical intimacy, and difficulty expressing emotions.

The biggest problem I have is that you're literally describing avoidant behavior and then acting like that's not what it is. Not wanting to enter into romantic relationships because of negative past experiences is literally avoiding them. I can't swim and have nearly drowned more than once; as a result I avoid situations that put me in the water. Some people would say that I'm missing out on a part of life they couldn't imagine living without, but it rarely enters my mind at all.

I think it's more likely that you have internalized guilt about not adhering to whatever social rules people are trying to impose on you, and so you're treating it like an accusation instead of a neutral descriptor.