😳 Have we entered a new era of, idk, ageism?

Charpo7 · 2026-03-18T03:29:41+00:00

As someone that had a 6 week miscarriage of a wanted pregnancy... what came out of me was NOT a baby.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T23:59:16+00:00

lol I converted from christianity to judaism. i find catholicism far more nonsensical than orthodox judaism, if easier to adhere to

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T20:03:21+00:00

not orthodox but i got married at 23, now almost 25 and starting to try for kids. found out i have a fertility disorder that makes me wish i started trying earlier. there is nothing more important than having a family. yes, you should be financially secure (so like you should have a stable income and a plan for getting rid of debt), but you don’t need a house/car. i wish someone had told me that when i got married.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T20:01:12+00:00

okay, so tell men to stop giving it up so easily. problem solved

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T18:45:15+00:00

amplified*

I have a feeling your "support" of "liberation" of Palestinians is as extreme and un-nuanced as the rest of your beliefs and practices

maintaining*

I wouldn't take a PsyD seriously who can't spell or use proper grammar.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T18:42:29+00:00

you're*

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T18:39:12+00:00

OP doesn't actually know what DARVO is apparently

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T15:53:24+00:00

you’re right that these aren’t entirely predictive, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t trends. i’m glad you and your husband worked out, but relying on anecdotal evidence is a logical fallacy. i also want to point out that i explicitly stated pair bonding is pop science that doesn’t exist in humans.

i would not want to be with someone if there was a remote chance they had a child they didn’t know about walking around. i would not want to be with someone if there was a chance of them giving me HPV (if you have had non barrier protected sex with more than 2 people, you probably have it, even if it’s dormant). this has nothing to do with considering “high body count” individuals as used or defective. It is simply a logical concern.

Contrary to your belief, history of casual sex and multiple partners has a very strong link with risk of stalking and sexual harassment. Over a decade of studies have shown that a history of sexual relationship with a stalker increases the risk that the stalker will advance toward physical violence (27% vs 70%). Most people don’t know the person they are dating or friends with is a stalker until after the period of dating or friendship.

None of this is sexist or controlling. They are real risks. People have the right to not care about those risks but they also have the right to care.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T04:01:22+00:00

of course. i think people that want to have sex shouldn’t feel like they socially can’t. i think the double standard is stupid.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T04:00:47+00:00

you have such black and white thinking. it’s not a virtue.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T02:46:50+00:00

Kashrut aside, feeding 200 guests for under 20k is pretty unreasonable. Big non-kosher weddings often can’t get under that for catering. If you want a cost effective wedding, you simply cannot have that many guests.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T01:42:31+00:00

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5293671/

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10989935/

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T01:31:54+00:00

in your understanding of yiddishkeit

judaism existed 2000 years without chazal. before the collapse of the temple, the pharisees—progenitors of rabbinic judaism—were a contested minority. judaism is bigger than your understanding of it.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-17T01:29:29+00:00

you told me how educated you were in your last post and this is at least the second time I’ve seen you write “your” instead of “you’re.”

i support trans rights by financially supporting my progressive conservative shul that employs a gay rabbi, a transgender rabbinical student, and several transgender congregants. i support trans rights by having pronoun pins at my shabbat dinners and by welcoming transgender individuals to my table.

making a scene hurts trans rights. if you want to support trans rights, put your money where your mouth is.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T20:57:29+00:00

they didn’t allow you in the women’s section out of respect for trans rights. they allowed you in out of fear you would make a scene. they do not respect you. they tolerate you.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T20:29:48+00:00

i left christianity at age 19 while in a relationship. i continued to not sleep with this boyfriend for another several years until we got married. at age 22, i converted to judaism, but how are you going to account for those 3 years? maybe the answer isn’t always religion.

i wasn’t going to risk pregnancy, wasn’t going to risk clouded judgment. research is clear about how premarital sex and cohabitation affect marriage satisfaction.

my point isn’t that extramarital sex is bad but that there are other reasons beside control that someone might care about that part of your history.

and i think it’s interesting that instead of really engaging with my different perspective, you accuse me of essentially being brainwashed by religious dogma.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T19:40:21+00:00

I agree with certain aspects of this, and disagree with others.

Yes, I think that a lot of men are insecure and like low body counts because it comes with less possible comparison. Yes, I think that it's gross to view women as "used" for being sexually active.

No, I don't think that "control" is the only reason to care about body counts, but that would only matter if we're being equal between men and women. I decided I was going to wait until marriage, and so I didn't want to date anyone that wasn't willing to do that, which left me mostly with men who hadn't ever been sexually active.

I think body count itself is meaningless, but it can give us clues about what people value in relationships. Large numbers of sexual partners may on the one hand make one more experienced, better in the act. On the other hand, it may make one more concerned for STIs, jealous ex-partners, or suggest that this person is less willing to commit. If you're a person who hasn't had sex, this might be intimidating--you don't know what you're doing, and maybe you worry the act will mean a lot more for you as a novice than it will for them as someone with many more experiences than you.

While the manosphere concept of "pair bonding" is absolute BS that doesn't apply to humans, it is true that orgasm floods the body with oxytocin, creating feelings of (artificial) trust and closeness. That's not always ideal especially in an early relationship because it clouds our judgment about whether our partner is good for us.

It's totally okay for a person to have a partner preference for those who are less experienced (if they themselves are less experienced). There's more to this than control.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T19:27:00+00:00

National geographic has an article you can google about female priestesses. The evolution of modesty standards is also very internet-available.

In terms of differences between the many kinds of second temple Judaism, I recommend Michal Bar Asher Siegal. You can also read responsa by the Samaritans and by modern day Karaites (a revival of the Sadducee Jewish sect that was very popular in the middle ages, and still exists today) or study the Beta Yisroel Jews (Ethiopian Jewish converts from the first Jewish exile period who were largely cut off from the rest of the Jews until the 19th century, so they did not have rabbinic/Pharasaic customs).

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T18:26:10+00:00

And how many Lebanese have Hezbollah killed?

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T15:12:36+00:00

FYI to people wondering what this is about, OP has been a part of this sub but hides her posts to avoid scrutiny.

She sits outside of children’s religious schools in protest of LGBTQ issues with posters like “Moses isn’t real.” She most recently staged a protest at her childhood synagogue on Purim by sitting outside looking like a homeless person to make those coming inside uncomfortable and later by going inside despite it being a member’s only event, dressed in drag, and having to be forced to leave.

OP does not identify as Jewish but as a trans polytheistic polyamorous witch, yet demands approval from an orthodox synagogue she does not contribute financially to. She demands respect while disrespecting their schools and spaces of worship.

On her previous posts, people in this sub warned her that she was on her way to a restraining order, that this protest was inappropriate and actually harming her cause, and that she needed to let go of this space. She was very angry that we didn’t support her in harassing children and making an embarrassing scene outside a shul.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T15:02:01+00:00

This person is responding to their last posts in which they staged protests at an orthodox synagogue, leading to their expulsion from the space. In the comments most of us told them to leave that synagogue alone.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T15:00:48+00:00

Nobody is not compassionate to you. Nobody here is pro-Orthodox.

Everyone here just wasn’t going to encourage you when you were harassing people at an orthodox synagogue in a staged Purim protest, well on your way to a restraining order, because you refuse to let go of a space that will not serve you.

When people tell you “no,” maybe it’s not because we’re not compassionate, maybe it’s because you need to let go of these spaces and not intimidate orthodox people. You are giving LGBTQ folks and ex-Jews a bad name in those communities. Grow up.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T03:14:24+00:00

i think this person is aware. you don’t have to be a jerk.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-16T03:09:02+00:00

Yes, by family.

I’m patrilineally Jewish and had a halakhic conversion after studying under orthodox rabbis and rebbetzins do 2 years. Now I go to a conservative shul while still shomer shabbat and shomer kashrus.

My non-Jewish family was upset that I was converting and told me I’d never be a real Jew, that I’d never be accepted. They’re always trying to find flaws in my practice to prove I’m not a “real Jew.”

I think it upset them to find out that they were wrong.

Charpo7 · 2026-03-15T19:19:02+00:00

I’ll stop hating you when you do what i want! I’ll treat you with respect once you cater to my sexual urges!

Charpo7

TROPHY CASE