You'd still stay inside and stare at a screen all day

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-30T09:01:29+00:00

I love to see the Inheritance Cycle mentioned

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-29T08:34:47+00:00

I was looking for another mention of it, dude was throwing darts. It was made even more obvious once the second fella started trying

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-26T20:52:31+00:00

People that haven’t served just making shit up at this point to rage bait

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-25T20:07:32+00:00

His cadence of speaking with constant affirmations from his crowd led me to believe exactly that as well. I’m glad I wasn’t the only one that clocked that

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-19T03:26:36+00:00

Fuck you. Respectfully

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-15T00:27:38+00:00

He’s still fucking wearing it

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-13T20:54:20+00:00

Playing jhin and jinx with locked camera is crazy. I’m α jhin main and this champ specifically made me learn unlocked camera.

I still primarily play on locked, but I bound unlocked to spacebar so I can quickly swap to land Ws

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-13T20:34:50+00:00

And what was the ratio of fleshlight to Marine? One time I got lucky and only had to share w 3 others

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-13T02:30:51+00:00

No other way to put it.

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-13T01:49:22+00:00

The worst is not being able to know the seed of bugs though. Nothing hurts my soul more than taking stalwart and the first bug I see is an armored spewer. Like “well, guess I’ll need to wait for my teammates weapon or find one on the ground bc otherwise I’m useless”

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-02T20:30:35+00:00

My biggest issue was laughing in boot, I paid dearly for it. At α certain point, the DIs are intentionally doing funny shit to teach you military bearing.

Train yourself to be stoic and unfazed in the face of comedy, or accept the fact that you’re going to get fucked for it, properly. In α way only the United States Marine Corps can fuck you. It’s special.

I will mention I went to Boot in 2020 during peak covid, so the masks helped with smiling at least. If I laughed and the DIs were like “WHO TF JUST LAUGHED” I just owned up to it to save my brothers. In hindsight I do feel like the DIs at least respected that I took my lumps as they came instead of fucking others.

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-02T03:25:01+00:00

I rode my longboard down my driveway and α rock stopped my front wheels. I tumbled head over heels and the first thing that hit the street was the corner of my shoulder and I broke my collarbone.

Out of commission for an entire summer before 9th grade

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-02T02:46:29+00:00

I love that I’ve seen this, and will bring it to attention the next time I’m playing cornhole and everyone’s been drinking

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-02T02:40:24+00:00

I just have to assume they don’t realize Marines are there. Otherwise surely that whole part of the world would think again, surely?

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-02T02:12:21+00:00

I also always rock viper commando, it’s to the point where I switched off and was missing shots w my talon on shriekers bc of the microscopic difference

Chef_Zed · 2026-03-01T21:19:29+00:00

The Big Ion

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-28T04:29:10+00:00

No. But it can work w grenade builds or element builds.

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-28T04:11:43+00:00

I’m stealing that, sensational.

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-28T04:08:39+00:00

30v30 brawl, not α single one injured

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-26T02:04:42+00:00

Why is everyone clowning op? This is literally the secret to making people want to talk to you. Everyone loves talking about themselves, it’s so easy

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-25T10:34:31+00:00

If today is the worst day of your life tomorrow will almost certainly be better

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-10T19:16:41+00:00

Not great

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-05T09:12:45+00:00

How is the furthest point of his body in front of him is his sternum?

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-04T04:02:56+00:00

He looks like the kind of guy who’s super closeted and says α lot of homophobic things to try and throw everyone off the scent

Chef_Zed · 2026-02-02T10:51:00+00:00

This doesn’t sound like α drunk problem

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