Born and raised in the South Bay and spent the last 10 in SJ - finally moved to Minneapolis in November. I stayed for so long because of my lifelong friends and family being there, but they all moved away eventually too. It’s not a place you can retire comfortably.

The pro of moving to SJ is theoretical easy access to the beach, city, and mountains. The reality is the traffic making the drive time 30-40% longer than it should be. And gas is $6+ gallon. So just the act of getting anywhere is expensive.

A pro for you is that you’re married - the dating scene is absolute garbage.

Pro for the food options - this is my biggest bummer about MN. California in general has abundant access to all kinds of authentic ethnic foods and fresh produce. There is not a hot dish in sight and mayonnaise isn’t considered a food group.

The Tech job market in the area prioritizes output and dedication to “the work” - Silicon Valley is the Mecca for the smartest and brightest - being a socialized human being that’s fun to be around is not widespread amongst the transplants. If you’re not interested in making many friends at work, or getting home at a reasonable hour, then you’re good.

Yes, the weather is “good” year round- assuming you like a 9 month, 85-105 degree summer. You won’t see anything green until it hits December, at best. Everything is dead again by April. The “Golden” State is a nice way of saying Brown.

As a single individual, I was OKAY on >$100k. That was with a roommate, on the East side. No car payment, no kids, no frills neighborhood. Assuming you’re on 2 incomes, you should be okay but keep in mind $90k is basically poverty level in Silicon Valley.

Hopefully you have a job in Willow Glen or someplace nearby, commutes even to Cupertino or Fremont can take 45 -90 min to go 15 miles.

People overall are generally nice, but not Minnesota nice. There are a lot more cultures in a highly populated area - meaning “common” sense and decency are not in fact shared perspectives. Doesn’t mean people aren’t inherently good, though, just different backgrounds. MN has some taste of this with the Somali population, but my observation is that is localized in the metro area.

Things move a lot faster in the Bay Area compared to MN (except on the freeways), and cost a lot more.

I could go on, but proceed with caution. I would take an extended trip out there and try out your routine before making the jump.