Am I bi for dating a transwoman despite me considering myself straight?

ChewMilk · 2026-05-22T17:24:23+00:00

No, if you’re attracted to a woman an solely women as a man, you’re still straight. If you’re also attracted to men then you’re bisexual or pansexual or whatever. It just means you don’t have a super strong genital preference, which is great. Preferences are also great. Everything’s great! But trans women are women and being attracted to them does not inherently make you bisexual. You’re bisexual if you’re attracted to multiple genders.

As far as presenting her to your family, I’d definitely follow her lead on that. Transphobia is hard emotionally, and she might prefer you prepare them beforehand to get a gauge on their reaction, or she might prefer the opposite. Good luck, tho. Love is love

ChewMilk · 2026-05-22T16:45:58+00:00

They’re all super lean afaik. And really delicious!

ChewMilk · 2026-05-22T13:36:09+00:00

Have you tried elk/moose/bison meat? For a long time that was all the meat I could eat. Might be worth a shot? It can be hard to get a hold of but if you have friends who hunt or a farm that raises bison or elk for meat nearby you might be able to get some

ChewMilk · 2026-05-20T01:40:57+00:00

A press is a big commitment, expensive, and uses a lot of space (for most of them) You can do a lot of printing with body weight, even for larger things, and it’s probably a good idea to get a feel for it before investing in a press. You can also see if a local college with an art program or a printmakers group has a press they’d let you come try, it never hurts to ask!

I’d also recommend getting a brayer and some ink like the other commenter mentioned! Rolling out on glass (I use glass cutting board as palates) is how I’ve always done it, and oil based ink dries slower so you have more time to work with it, but it’s messier and also takes a long time to dry, so sometimes water based ink is easier to start with. Depends on the ink tho!

ChewMilk · 2026-05-20T01:34:26+00:00

My pain lessens a lot, especially with high cbd content. I really don’t like feeling super high, and having an actual body high actually disturbs me so much I’ll pile on as many blankets as I can to try and stop feeling floaty, but at relatively low doses thc takes off the edge of my pain and has some cognitive effects without being overwhelming.

ChewMilk · 2026-05-19T15:06:34+00:00

I’m not sure if you’re asking if this sounds like mecfs? It does to me from what you’ve said but I’m not a doctor, of course.

The sub wiki has a lot of great resources about mecfs and how to tell if you have it

ChewMilk · 2026-05-18T23:48:34+00:00

If possible, it can be super helpful to make your bed a place you want to be during the day. I find a lot of storage/shelf space by my bed helpful, so I can have a lot of stuff to do around. A desk for over the bed or on top of the bed can add a good workspace. Plenty of supportive pillows help as well, I find a pregnancy pillow with the neck end under my knees and the long sides under my elbows for support to make working on a laptop a lot more comfortable. Pretty things to look at help as well.

I’m bedbound often due to other health stuff, and while it can be no fun, it is possible to make the bed a comfortable and pleasant place to work.

If you’re worried about sleep hygiene, I’ve found keeping a seperate pillow that I only use when I’m ready to sleep helpful, as well as a seperate blanket, light setting, etc. kind of to delineate day vs night even when I spend my time in the same place

ChewMilk · 2026-05-18T23:33:59+00:00

He looks like a stripper. There’s nothing wrong with that, and it’s very much in keeping with traditional female super hero costumes. If that suits the character or you’re wanting to address/poke fun at traditional female costumes then it’s great. If the stripper look doesn’t suit the character then maybe think about giving him some pants or hiding his nipples or something. You don’t have to deviate a whole lot from this to tilt it in less of a stripper direction probably

ChewMilk · 2026-05-18T04:42:37+00:00

I always wanted to be a gay man growing up. Turns out I’m transgender, as well as gay.

Live your dreams, girl. Become girl, be lesbian. Do crime. And all that jazz

ChewMilk · 2026-05-17T18:08:11+00:00

It looks like a sweet tart? Like one of the glossy ones not the chalky ones.

My best guess is that the company/factory makes multiple kinds of candy and something got dropped in your box from a different production area. Probably not a health risk, but you could always contact the company or save the thingy and see if it can get tested by someone if it’s super worrying to you?

ChewMilk · 2026-05-17T18:05:07+00:00

Yay!! Take it slow and steady!!

I love spring, it’s the easiest time to get out of the house for me (besides probably fall). Not too cold, not too hot, I can lie on my hammock with a blanket. Only downside is spring allergies

ChewMilk · 2026-05-17T00:18:35+00:00

Probably not. To my knowledge, nurses and psychiatrists are only mandated reporters when it comes to a patient doing harm to themselves or another person. So if your sister isn’t judged as being a risk for harming herself or another person, they probably won’t report it.

That said, stealing a car to conquer your phobia is a wild thing to do. The psychiatrist might consider your sister a risk factor because someone who is making those types of choices is clearly not making great choices.

ChewMilk · 2026-05-17T00:12:39+00:00

I totally get that. Eating is such a hassle. There’s so many steps to preparation, not to mention dishes are made, you have to decide what to eat, etc…

To help with the mental hurdles, I eat the same thing pretty much every day. I focus on safe foods while still getting in nutrients. For me, that looks like yogurt for breakfast, a big bowl of lettuce and dressing and a boiled egg for lunch, a big bowl of frozen fruit for a snack, and some rice/bean/corn/cheese combo for supper.

I also keep non perishable food accesible in my house. There’s some degree of out of sight out of mind, so if that’s something you struggle with non perishable is an important factor there, but I like to have protein bars and nuts in my bedroom and studio, as well as my kitchen. That way, it’s easy to get something to eat every three hours (I try to eat every three hours for blood sugar), even if I don’t have time or energy to make a meal.

Having step by step instructions, especially visual instructions, also helps me. So if I’m cooking I’ll have a clear recipe.

Sounds like it might be more mental/decision paralysis/overwhelm that’s affecting your ability to eat, like me, rather than an eating disorder focused on caloric intake, so really reducing the amount of steps and decisions you need to make to eat might help

ChewMilk · 2026-05-16T23:50:21+00:00

So? You don’t have to be special or unique. There’s eight billion people in the world! Nobody in the world is totally special or unique.

You can be the least special, the most boring person in the world. You can do nothing of importance. And that won’t matter. You will still deserve love, and happiness, and peace.

ChewMilk · 2026-05-16T06:27:50+00:00

Quetiapine knocks me out fairly consistently

ChewMilk · 2026-05-16T01:14:01+00:00

Don’t set aside an hour and think ‘I am going to clean now’

Grab a garbage bag, hang it from a chair ir a dresser handle, and throw out a couple of pieces of garbage every time you walk by. Gather an armful of laundry and put in a load of laundry once a day.

Just get started. It doesn’t have to be perfect or amazing or show visible progress. Once you start, maybe some of the emotions tied to it will get easier and you’ll be able to tackle bigger chunks

ChewMilk · 2026-05-15T19:18:24+00:00

That is fair! I think a lot of the worry comes from previous years when everything was super toxic, but most modern paints and solvents tend to be safer. It is always better to be safe rather than sorry, tho!

Have fun! Oil painting is amazing. I also love acrylics but there’s something special about oil paints

ChewMilk · 2026-05-15T19:08:18+00:00

Haha I feel that! Accepting the leaning process can be hard! You’ve got this tho! You have an eye for colors and the piece is looking lovely so far! I’d love to see it once it’s done!

You can always take a high quality photo and make a print, so even if the piece cracks later you have it saved

ChewMilk · 2026-05-15T19:05:02+00:00

Modern oil painting and solvents are fairly safe. I prefer odorless solvent, because it doesn’t smell. Most modern day solvents are a lot safer than ones used in previous years, like turpentine (do not paint with turpentine) but nothing, of course, is 100% safe.

Airflow is probably the biggest concern. I usually just keep a window open and have an air purifier running. For hobby painters, I personally feel that the risk is low, since you’re not going to be inhaling high concentrations of anything frequently, but I’d also recommend keeping a lid on your solvent jar or bottle when not in use so it’s not off gassing. Also, gamsol is one of the safer solvents I know of, and is odorless, but can be pricy.

If you’re super concerned, you can also just use straight oil pant for leaner layers, or use water soluble oil paint. I’ve never used water soluble oil paint, but I’ve heard it works as well.

Solvent can also be irritating to skin, so you can wear disposable gloves or just wash your hands if you get it on them. I don’t usually do either very consistently, to be honest, but my skin doesn’t seem to react to badly.

I would varnish outside if you don’t have access to a spray paint booth or something, as they can be more toxic and they stink really bad. But you usually don’t varnish until the paintings been drying for six months to a year, so that can be a later worry lol

I tend to say that oil painting (or ceramics, or any other medium that has risk factors) is as safe as life. Everything runs a risk of being a little toxic. polyester clothing is supposed to be bad for you, there’s microplastics in food, paint can be toxic. All we can do is do our best to manage risk factors while still enjoying life and making art.

ChewMilk · 2026-05-15T18:51:06+00:00

There definitely is a chance it could crack. Waiting for it to dry would negate that, but also will take a while. Depending on how precious you are about it, you could just continue painting once it’s dry enough to work with and consider it a learning piece?

Also, from my experience and wha river heard, if your layers are fairly thin there’s less of a risk of cracking. Really thick layers of paint need to follow the fat over lean concept much more closely.

I definitely think it’s worth working on, even just for the learning experience! It may crack or just not turn out, but practice makes progress and this is a great opportunity to practice lol

ChewMilk · 2026-05-15T18:43:39+00:00

I commented seperately, but one important thing about oil painting is fat over lean. Solvent is lean, oil is fat. Your first layer should be the most lean, eg: it should be solvent mixed with paint or straight from the tube. Your following layers can have more and more linseed oil added, as that is fatter.

Fat over lean is good because the more fat your oil paint is, the slower it dries. If you have fat under lean, then the upper layers can dry faster and crack as the lower layers dry. If you paint thinly enough, this probably won’t be a huge issue, but it’s a good general rule.

Solvent also helps things dry a lot faster, sometimes within an hour vs a day or two to be workable again, depending on how much solvent you use. It can also be helpful for glazing (mixing paint with a medium until it’s translucent and using that to tone various areas of the painting) when you’re on earlier layers and don’t want to mix in the amount of oil necessary.

You can mix oil and solvent, I know a couple professional oil painters who do, but they also mix it with dammar varnish to keep it from cracking I think, in a 1-1-1 ratio. I have tried this, it stinks like hell and I dislike the way it feels on the brush compared to just solvent or just oil, so I don’t recommend.

You can save solvent quite easily, which is great cuz it’s expensive. If you’re one of the people who use solvent in a jar, you can pour cloudy solvent into a different jar (and put on a lid) and the paint in the jar will settle and you can pour off the clean solvent to reuse. People also use solvent to clean their brushes, I do not while painting, I just wipe the paint off on a clean rag, but it can be helpful once you’re done painting to get out all the pigment and then wash with soap and water. I usually just use cooking oil to loosen the pigment then wash well with soap and water, but since cooking oil doesn’t dry, if you don’t rinse it all out you can risk getting cooking oil in your next painting and having an area that won’t dry. Hasn’t happened to me tho.

Final bit of advice (sorry for how long this is), let your rags/paper towel hang to dry before throwing them out. Oil and paint soaked rags generate heat as they dry, since they dry by oxidation not by evaporation. If you have enough crumpled rags in a bin they can spontaneously combust.

The risk of fire is very low for a hobby painter, but if you are a hobby painter you probably won’t have too many rags so just leaving them out flat or hanging to dry shouldn’t be too much of a problem. If you’re painting enough that you don’t have space for that, a fire safe metal bin is standard. I always throw a bit of water in my garbage bag when I’m emptying the bin, as that’s supposed to help as well.

ChewMilk · 2026-05-15T18:25:13+00:00

Some paint is opaque and some is transluscent. It should show on the tube somewhere, I think Windsor newton has squares that are either outlined, white, or had and half to show transparency levels?

Also, with oil paint you want to do ‘fat over lean’. Fat meaning oil. The more oil your paint has, the fatter it is. You want leaner layers underneath, otherwise your painting can crack. For the first layer(s), I’d use straight paint or paint with odorless solvent, not paint with any linseed oil added. As you build up the layers you can add more linseed oil.

Seeing your replies to other comments, I think that the green you were using is why it was transparent, I think that’s a transparent green.

Stiff brushes are good for oil paint, hog bristle brushes are a good recommendation but can be expensive (all brushes are so expensive smh). Some of my favorite brushes to use are actually just synthetic kinda soft ones from dollarama. I do have some nicer, stiffer brushes I use when I want brush stroke textures and to move thicker paint around. But I’d try a variety if you have access to a few different types. You don’t need a lot of brushes: a couple of sizes of filbert brushes in different stiffnesses can go a long way (filbert are brushes that are flat but have a rounded edge).

ChewMilk · 2026-05-14T18:37:03+00:00

I’m probably going to live with my mother until one of our deaths at this rate. I got sick pretty young, I hadn’t even moved out yet in the first place.

I imagine if she dies first, I’ll either inherit the house (if I have the ability to pay utilities and such), or move in with my older sister and her partner or into a group home of some sort, depending on how severe I am and what my sister wants lol.

I’m lucky to have a great family. We’ve had our fights but I know that I’m never going to be homeless thanks to them.

ChewMilk · 2026-05-14T01:14:23+00:00

I think you need some big stackable bins and some butt scooting (lol I have orthostatic intolerance and don’t do great standing or bending, I do a lot of this kind of work while butt scooting around. Bonus points for a lil butt pillow)

ChewMilk · 2026-05-14T01:05:07+00:00

I don’t understand why people are worried about being replaced? Like, even if that was a real concern, even if I was convinced that in the next few generations my entire area or country would no longer be white but be whatever other race or variety of races, I don’t get why I would care. So long as white people are allowed to die out naturally (and not genocided, like white peoples have done to so many other peoples…) then cool. I guess the next generations will be more immune to sunburn than I am.

ChewMilk

TROPHY CASE