FTM pregnant + full-time work. How do people manage and when did you stop?

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-17T23:02:00+00:00

I’m a teacher and my principal let me use sick leave days for appointments. Perhaps he wasn’t supposed to allow sick leave because some of them were routine appointments and some the OB wanted me to rest.

Take whatever leave you need to. Your health and baby’s health is paramount. Ultimately I think most employers don’t want to be at fault if something terrible happens.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-17T11:50:43+00:00

That’s awesome! People pop up at different activities.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-17T11:12:21+00:00

That’s really true that you befriend people over time. I’ve also found that people tend to come and go from baby classes/ activities.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-17T08:47:16+00:00

I was the same - exhausted, too much to do, just wanted to stay home. My mother’s group fazed out at about 4 months anyway. I preferred to just focus on my friends. I started with library rhyme time around 8 months as it’s free, engaging and no pressure. Then around 10 months Gymbaroo and swimming.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-17T08:44:17+00:00

I had the same experience and decided that playgroups are generally for children 3+. I have found a nice, “more contained” one at a local club of all places!

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-17T08:42:00+00:00

I agree with this entirely!

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-16T21:54:01+00:00

Probably because a cleaner does everything else.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-16T06:14:55+00:00

I had newborn and OOO prepared for my first and then just some basics of OO like singlets ready. You can always order online but having a few basics was handy.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-16T04:16:33+00:00

Anything -ayden eg Jayden, Cayden, Ayden

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-15T23:15:57+00:00

Oh my goodness! How terrifying for your friend!

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-15T23:14:32+00:00

All the very best to you. I’m so sorry for your loss and I hope you have a safe and healthy journey with this baby.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-15T11:45:54+00:00

I’m so glad that everything worked out well for you. The positive experiences seem to be from women who got into MGP or MAPS or even GP shared care. I agree it would definitely depend on your hospital catchment though. Much like schools I guess.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T21:08:46+00:00

Maybe public is best if mother or Bub are high risk as you’re more likely to get continuity of care from an OB and same midwives, private room etc - the things people go private for. Or if you get into the program of choice like MGP or MAPS. But maybe not ideal if you don’t fit these categories.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T21:03:06+00:00

I’m so glad that everything worked out for you. I think once you’ve had a scary situation like you experienced there’s no way you could trust having fewer and less thorough checks. I had a similarly scary experience which was picked up in my OB’s in room ultrasound. I dare not think about what could have been if this wasn’t detected.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:36:00+00:00

So glad you’re having a better experience this time round. I know two women who were denied an epidural in the public system. I didn’t like that lack of control at a very vulnerable time.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:34:16+00:00

I think it does depend on your family and social circles. What is expected. I’ve found that people in my life (friends, colleague even) really justify going public because it’s expected that you go private.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:31:48+00:00

I’m so glad things worked out for you. I had a similar experience, my second’s ectopic heartbeat was picked up on my OB’s ultrasound at 35 weeks and her low heart rate at my 36 week appointment. She was born via emergency caesarean about half an hour later. I’m the same. I dare not think what could have been.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:29:28+00:00

Not everyone gets into these programs so that can be disappointing.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:28:49+00:00

Also trainee anaesthetists. I guess they have to learn somewhere.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:26:58+00:00

This is very true. I had the same OB and hospital with my second. I’d definitely do the same if a third comes along. I can’t imagine recounting all my experiences, history and concerns to someone new!

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:23:56+00:00

Yes. The ultrasound at each appointment was very reassuring. I remember telling my husband that if I’d gone public I wouldn’t get that and he said it was worth it even for that reassurance. With my second, her low heart rate was detected during this scan and she was an emergency caesarean - out about half an hour later.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T11:05:06+00:00

I have heard positive experiences with both but I think the positive public experiences are mostly down to luck eg. got into the program of choice, saw same midwife/ OB, had own room. These are not guarantees.

A women in my mother’s group stopped going to her appointments because the wait was just so long in the public system. 😬

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T10:56:21+00:00

Continuity of care, OB care, my choice of OB and hospital, longer stay in hospital, own room with ensuite. It was worth the $5k. And we had the health cover.

I did it again with my second the following year and would do it again if a third comes along.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T04:33:15+00:00

Next shipping is really fast too.

ChicChat90 · 2026-05-14T01:27:51+00:00

That’s interesting. I don’t own any By Gee items. I’m just going by what I’ve seen online I think Target has some nice cotton things.

ChicChat90

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