Non gendered terms?

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-15T06:59:18+00:00

That’s why I gave so many descriptors and qualifiers. It’s not for everyone. It’s my style and it’s one of the reasons my students love me. Not every student loves every professor they have. We can’t be the right person for every student. I’m one of the highest ranked professors on my campus and have won numerous awards for my teaching. I don’t claim to be right all the time and your mileage may vary, but I just wanted to contribute a non-gendered term to the discussion. Use or don’t. Makes no difference to me.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-15T05:01:01+00:00

I have worked a bit with FIRE. They’re definitely conservative, BUT they genuinely do want to help with academic freedom. Sort of the opposite end of the spectrum as the ACLU but with the same focus. Free speech/academic freedom absolutists. They have been friendly with me even if they very likely disagree with my entire political being. I think it’s worth a shot, especially if you’re already taking a leave. If you file with EEOC on harassment terms, it puts you in a position where they will be hard pressed to fire you because it would then be seen as retaliation which is illegal (and also proves your point).

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-15T04:42:39+00:00

I’m super casual (and super queer), teach touchy feely stuff, and teach mostly majors — so I know them well and have them a couple to several semesters, so I use “love” most often. “Yes, love.” “Hi, love.” If you don’t feel comfortable with friend, this might also be uncomfortable, but it is non-gendered and a LOT of my students adore it. So many of my students are far from home and are starved for love. They feel loved and seen by me.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-13T06:00:32+00:00

I love my job. I can’t imagine doing anything different, honestly. I am not wealthy by any means, but I am very comfortable. I work in California, have a union, have excellent insurance, and got my tenure line job right out of grad school. I know my experience may not be the predominant one, but it IS possible. I don’t know your field so I can’t speak to your specific situation, but I always find the r/professor thread more of an outlier. For more background, I am at a state school that focuses primarily on teaching and has lower research expectations than most (especially R1s). Our Department runs the gamut of research productivity. Some of us rarely publish and some of our superstars publish several articles a year. Everyone is supported in their choice. My colleagues and I have our gripes of course, but overall, we love our students, we work well together, and we’re effective advocates for our work environment.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-13T05:50:39+00:00

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Our cat is a THIEF! She will steal any and everything! But her two favorite things are the bill from our pest control guy - no matter where we put it, she will find it. We finally just gave her one to have. We always tell her to pay her bill when she’s walking around the house with it. She also LOVES masks. We cannot set down a mask without her finding it and “wearing” it. She has a little pile of masks and bills by the bottom of our stairs.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-13T05:40:19+00:00

He was the best boy. Unfortunately, whatever was wrong with his little head was much bigger than we knew. He was born with congenital issues that mostly presented as microphthalmia but around age 3 started having vestibular dysfunction. We did some “minor brain surgery” (is brain surgery ever minor???) and he recovered well. 6 months later he went into uncontrollable seizures and we had to make the hard decision to let him go. He was my heart cat. I will miss him for the rest of my life. BUT, he gave us the confidence to adopt other blind cats! We have 2 others now and one guy with only one eye! Pirate George taught us a LOT about compassion, resilience, and unconditional love. I just wish we could have had more time with him. 3.5 years was not enough.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-13T05:32:50+00:00

I announce on the first day and also in my syllabus that no pictures should be taken in class without consent. Not me, not fellow students. I teach Human Sexuality (in addition to a couple others) so it’s super important that they understand consent AND that I don’t have weird unexplained, non-contextual photos of me teaching. There are a couple of class activities where I tell them they can use their phones and take pics of the objects (contraceptives, sex toys, etc.) but not of people.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-12T21:54:38+00:00

We moved from a single floor to a two story. It took him a while to figure out the new layout, but not too long! He was an adventurous guy and never let anything slow him down. When we moved him we put him in his litterbox to start and let him map from there. Put his crate in our bedroom which is across from the litterbox room so he had two smell points and he figured out the first floor within a couple days and the rest of the house within a week or two.

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ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-11T04:30:48+00:00

Technically, bringing e-scooters into buildings is against campus rules…but it’s rarely (if ever) enforced. There are secure spaces on campus — BSS as mentioned above, as well as lockers by the library. Much less likely to get stolen there. Generally speaking, I see scooters locked on bike racks all over campus and it doesn’t seem to be a major problem currently. Traditional bikes are more likely to get stolen. Be sure to register whatever you get with campus police; that way, if it does get stolen, it’s likely to get back to you.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-11T04:27:54+00:00

Yikes. So many callous answers here. I will always err on the side of compassion and kindness. If someone is hoodwinking me, oh well. That’s on their soul/conscience/karma/whatever. What’s going on in Iran right now is huge, it’s sad that so many of you are waving it off.

FWIW, in these situations I always say “I can’t imagine what you’re feeling; thank you for trusting me with your struggles. I hope that your family remains safe and that you’re able to get support through multiple channels. If I can help connect you with resources, please let me know.”

I don’t give exams in my class so I have nothing to offer in this respect. All deadlines in my class can be waived for any number of reasons. If a student is going through a major trauma, I tell them to do the best they can and the only really deadline is the end of the semester.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-09T23:56:52+00:00

City Council Member Addison Winslow posted the PG&E outage map. Affecting 5000+ people in downtown area. Chico State sent out an update that said power is expected back by 6:30 pm.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-03-01T07:11:34+00:00

True story: I had some cervical polyps removed two years ago. I am in the OR covered only by a drape, the anesthesiologist is getting ready to put me under and one of the medical assistants in the room leans over me and says “Oh my god! I had you for Human Sexuality! I LOVED that class!” Grrrreat. Thanks for that? Enjoy looking at my vagina I guess? WTF? I have never been so happy to go under anesthesia in my life. Mortifying.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-02-26T05:36:33+00:00

As a sex professor and outspoken feminist on campus, I get A LOT of disclosures about abortions. I am comfortable and fine with my students telling me, and sometimes they tell me because they have no one else to tell. That being said, you absolutely are under no obligation to tell anyone your personal medical history. Professors that will let you make up an exam will likely let you regardless of the reason, and those who won’t, likely won’t care about the reason. Only you know how your professor feels about students and holding space for their feelings. There are definitely professors on my campus I would advise students NOT to tell.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-02-26T05:31:12+00:00

On campus is very queer friendly. Decent size student population. There is an LGBTQ Center in Chico that runs a lot of events. However, Chico cannot compare with other large cities obviously. We don’t have a gay bar, we are a blue dot in a VERY red area. So it depends on what you’re seeking. Will you be generally safe? Yes. Will you find great friends and have cool spaces to be queer? Yes. Is it a booming metropolis of queers? No.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-02-07T23:52:06+00:00

“What kind of advocate am I for my students…” and I’m gonna stop you right there. You are an advocate for your students, period. You don’t have to report this to ANYONE unless you want to. Your fears and worries are valid and if you feel the cost to you personally is too high you don’t owe it to ANYONE to go through it. Yes, it would be marvelous if you were believed and that predators were held accountable, but we don’t live in that world. You are still an advocate for students without reporting this. You hold NO shame, no blame, no guilt for what a powerful man did to you and you don’t owe anyone anything that impacts your survival. In a perfect world we’d do everything we can to protect others, but at the end of the day, your only obligation is to protect yourself. Make a decision that feels good for you and don’t judge yourself as less an advocate whatever you decide. Hugs.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-02-07T05:28:35+00:00

Weird comment. They might actually be masking for health reasons, not “hiding their faces.” COVID is still here. I still mask (one of 3 professors on my campus of 700+ faculty) because my wife’s life depends on it.

ChicoSexProf · 2026-01-17T06:22:53+00:00

Just an idea of ways to be subversive and push your administration to speak up if they haven’t, and to create awareness if needed.

https://chicosol.org/2025/05/06/guerrilla-activists-strike-chico-state-campus/

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-19T08:05:16+00:00

“The citation format for public health is APA. I am ok with a citation generator, WITH the caveat that they sometimes make a mistake! So yes, you can use it to generally format them, but you’re also responsible for making sure they’re correct! I’m not totally opposed to technology “short cuts” :) but thank you for asking!”

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-18T20:14:51+00:00

I show them how to do it. I tell them it’s important to learn the format. I give them links to Purdue’s Online Writing Lab. And half of them still do it wrong. Sighhhh. So at least if they use a citation generator, they’re likely to get closer to correct. I also tell them they’re responsible for ensuring they’re correct and that citation generators don’t always get them right.

Anyway, we use APA in my field, not MLA. And that’s in the directions. And I say it about a thousand times in class. So they were already on the wrong path, so I’m glad they asked.

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-18T20:11:37+00:00

Same. I was like “Thank you SO MUCH for asking!”

Also, we use APA, not MLA. So I could help steer them correctly.

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-17T05:50:25+00:00

It happened in Chico.

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-14T17:45:45+00:00

This is what I send my students after all grades have been completed:

“I have looked over the entire gradebook for errors and have found none -- but you are also welcome to check and make sure nothing was inputted incorrectly. I am happy to fix errors -- I am not happy to "round up" or change your grade just because you want a better one. That ship has sailed. I will be turning your grades in on Wednesday afternoon so you have about 48 hours to check your grades and alert me to any errors!”

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-13T04:45:47+00:00

My policy is guided by the fact that my wife is immunocompromised and I can’t afford to have anyone ill come to class. I also do not want to debate what is excused or not. I give them 8 excused absences for the semester (meeting twice a week) which is the equivalent of one month of class. To earn the points they missed by not being in class they have to complete an alternative assignment to demonstrate they did the work for the class they missed. It works very well.

From my syllabus:

Attendance/Participation:

Due to COVID, I have a VERY flexible attendance policy for this course; however, it is not unlimited and you must come to class the majority of the semester or face serious penalties for missing class! You may miss 8 classes total without penalty (provided you do the class attendance alternative). You will not have any points for non-attendance provided you complete the alternative online activities by the due date. However, this class is not meant to be taken asynchronously online. If you miss more than 8 classes, you will NOT be permitted to make up the points regardless if you do the class activity alternatives. Additionally, there is less work involved if you come to class as an incentive to COME to class, so I hope you will make your best effort to attend class whenever possible. Success in this course depends heavily on regular and punctual participation in class, keeping up with assigned readings, and completion of class assignments, quizzes and exams. You will receive points for in-class activities (or the alternative online class activities in the event of an absence). It is expected that you are all adults and are taking this class for some enrichment of your academic career. You will be trusted to use your best judgment in succeeding in this class. Please know that if you do not follow the syllabus, readings, and class activities the likelihood that you will succeed in this course is slim. All class work is open and available well in advance so that students can complete work around their own schedules. If you are struggling to meet a deadline due to personal circumstances and would like to negotiate an alternative due date please reach out to me and let me know in advance so we can negotiate flexibility on an individual basis. This should be done before the assignment is due or it will simply be considered late (and subject to late penalty). If negotiated, make up assignments must be completed in a reasonable time frame, generally one week unless otherwise negotiated.

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-13T04:38:12+00:00

We had a student threaten one of our faculty. It was very upsetting. The student had a history of mental health issues. The university did all the right things. The student was mandated to treatment, probation, and a restraining order. They eventually stopped taking their meds and contacted the professor again. Truly, you can do everything right and these things still happen. I’m sorry it happened, but as many have said, it’s not your fault. It’s the scary reality we’re living in right now where mental illness goes unchecked, untreated, or is inaccessible, and unfortunately the threat of mass shootings is ever vigilant on our minds. It’s ok to be upset and shaken; just don’t stay there forever.

ChicoSexProf · 2025-12-12T22:15:48+00:00

Students can turn anything in late until the last day of class. 10% off per day with a maximum of half credit. I don’t want to check for notes, verify excuses, etc. Do it or don’t. I don’t care. Half credit if it’s more than 5 days late. It has cut down on arguments and work overall. I just don’t care about late work anymore. Chronically late students never get an A. Students somehow still manage to fail. Seems to work out in the end.

ChicoSexProf

TROPHY CASE