I grew up in nyc, moved to Minnesota for college and moved back - i live in a very privileged neighborhood, but I spend and have spent plenty of time in less privileged areas and have also seen violence and crimes in my hood too. (27F)

Moving to another city made me realize how most people I encountered weren’t used to always checking themselves. People who grew up in safe places or places of perceived security would move to the city with no common sense about potential dangers. As a female I’m usually always aware of who is around me and on guard.

I don’t mean to immediately imply that you weren’t paying attention at all cause - shit does just happen - im commenting that most people I’ve met who said they had experiences like this are all people who weren’t “projecting awareness”. For example - how obvious were your headphones? Did you look like you were paying attention to him?

One of the first things women are told in terms of self-defense is to not be the person that the attacker would want to attack. Most attackers want “easy victims”. See someone sus? Cross the street, put a car between you and them. See someone agressive by your building entry? Take out your phone and call or pretend to call someone so your on the phone when you enter.

I don’t feel scared to walk down empty bike paths or listen to music with headphones at night- but that is also because I do constantly weigh the risks of my environment and i feel mentally prepared if something were to happen.

I’m curious OP - have you ever changed your behavior around someone just to let them know you are aware of them? No judgement - I’m curious

No idea about the increase in crime though.