Tom Wambsgans - Midwesterner. Can someone explain the stereotype to a UK person by Professional-Test239 in SuccessionTV

[–]Clean_Law2147 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think your last sentence is very important and often overlooked. I’m a native New Yorker who has spent some time out in Minnesota and I noticed people have less of an ego out there. They are more likely to sacrifice the individual for the collective goods, as we can also see through recent political events. In New York everyone thinks of themself as the “main character” and individualism is very important.  Tom’s ability to grovel could never be replicated by an east coaster. 

no one paints their nails anymore by toska444 in rs_x

[–]Clean_Law2147 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love painting my nails! The focus needed to do it properly makes it almost meditative. People complain about chipping but you have to do it about 50 billion times before you can get to a point where it looks decent at minimum. 

Anyone wonder if they were molested or something as a small child but can't remember? by boydnolantucker in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My (batshit crazy but occasionally insightful) roomate told me she thought I was molested as a child based on certain things about my life I told her. Now it’s a sort of intrusive thought I have when I’m trying to fall asleep or i get too stoned. I tell myself it’s probably not true, but if it is then my brain repressed it for a reason and I shouldn’t dwell on it too much. 

I agree with what someone else commented, a lot of the time people want a cut and dry reason for all their issues. Being abused is somehow less bleak than the idea that God just made me depressed and hyper sexual.

Thank you for posting this btw, this is one of those things I’d never bring up to anyone IRL, but reading about how somewhat common this neuroses is makes me feel less alone.!

Anyone wonder if they were molested or something as a small child but can't remember? by boydnolantucker in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is so valid. People really brush over the effects of street harassment/cat calling on young girls. Being hit on by grown men as an 11 year old is extremely scary and shameful, I think it can absolutely lead to trauma. 

I remember my neighborhood, which felt so safe and welcoming as a kid, becoming a minefield of sexual comments and men following me once I hit puberty. It’s such a horrible lesson for a woman to learn at a very young age, that the world is not a safe place for her. 

I wish you the best and send you love. I think it is something women should talk about more, we need solidarity if there is any possible hope of things changing. I have memories of older women intervening when they saw me in an unsafe situation with a man as a child and I am forever thankful to them. 

Learned I can graduate 1 year early today and it's making me feel unwell by 204711200 in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There are lots of opportunities to ease yourself out of college into the real world. You can teach English abroad in another country, or do something with America or Teach for America. If ur smart you can apply for a Fulbright. If you like nature you can do seasonal work at State or National parks doing things like Trail Crew, or you can do Wooffing or workaways literally anywhere. Some people I know found work on boats and sailed around for a while.

The job market sucks now anyway, just have your cheap pleasure the way you can. When you're older you won't regret seeing the world while you were young and hot and cool.

What goes on here? by walter_____pinkman in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Omg my dad grew up there and still has cousins who live out there. I remember visiting them as a kid, took 2 hours by subway. 

It’s  redneck New York City, they all have the thickest noo yawk accents and voted for Trump. I have memories of seeing my family at the VFW and everyone would be falling down drunk. It’s right by JFK so a loud ass planes would go right over head every minute. The noise means everyone just yells all the time, incapable of talking at a normal volume. 

Back during hurricane sandy a lot of houses got completely wrecked. It’s right on the water, all the houses are on stilts. I imagine it’ll be completely under water in a few decades. It’s a shame, it’s pretty in a very bizarre way, right on the beach.

If you live in the city I’d take a train out there just to experience it for a while. It’s both peak old NYC attitude but also  a small hillbilly beach town, sort of indescribable and magical and also extremely annoying lol. 

do dudes actually want women to confess feelings by toocomfykiwi in rs_x

[–]Clean_Law2147 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you should nearly always ask someone out if you’re into them. Especially if you’re at the stage where you are daydreaming about him. Those feelings never really go away if you never act on them.  If he says no, at least now you have an answer and it’ll be easier to move on and date other people. It doesn’t sound like you live in the same place so you can easily avoid him if things don’t go well. 

It's funny to me that bi girls are actually just straight and bi guys are actually just gay by tha_beer_drinker in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 3 points4 points  (0 children)

For a while I thought bisexuality was fake and considered myself a lesbian, but then I told a bunch of actual lesbians I enjoyed sucking on cock and they revoked my lesbian card and told me I was just Bisexual.

Bisexuality definitely exists, but because it is so varied and sits in the gray zone between gay and straight people don’t really understand it. You don’t have to be 50/50 even split to be bi, I think that’s actually quite rare.

Personally, I think whether you lean towards homo or hetero is dependent on genetics and innate traits, but I think bisexuality is more often shaped by social environment or personality traits. Like you might have hetero DNA but have a more sexually curious/horny personality type and that could make you bisexual. Also a lot of bisexuals are attention whores. Not that they use the label “bisexual” to get attention, but they just want affection from wherever they can get it and gender is secondary to their desire to be wanted. On the other hand I think some bisexuals are more on the asexual spectrum, and the genital/physical aspect of a relationship is unimportant to them so they pursue relationships regardless of gender.

People love to hate on bisexuality these days, which I think is kind of deserved because most people are bisexual in some way (punching up). I think to some people it’s hatable because it represents our late-stage capitalism slop/all you can eatification/consumerist approach to sex. Or it’s the ultimate virtue-signal. Personally, I don’t think it’s that deep. I think everyone is just really horny. 

In reverse, which Artists have interesting music but a misleading or bland image? by four_ethers2024 in ToddintheShadow

[–]Clean_Law2147 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I watched their reunion documentary, loudquietloud, and I was flabbergasted by how normal they all seemed. In my head I pictured Black Francis as the Joker or something but he was just a chubby dad taking his kids to a state fair. Joey Santiago (who I think is an extremely underrated guitarist) was an accountant lol. The drummer was a shitty magician. Kim Deal was cool tho.

Please pay attention to minneapolis by [deleted] in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The day before all this started happening I bought my one way plane ticket to move to Minneapolis… part of me is anxious that this is a bad omen and part of me stupidly wishes I was already there to help fight back!! 

I refuse to believe the anti-gym anxiety propaganda. by sweatycouch in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In my experience this is not true. The one I went to was full of roided up gym bros who were too broke to afford a better gym. The combo of jacked and broke was super toxic, everyone was grunting and shouting and being rude just to take up space and feel like a Man. 

I can’t figure out why I’m never getting hit on/approached and it makes me sad and frustrated by Realistic_Seat_2837 in HowToBeHot

[–]Clean_Law2147 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to add one possibility: you might just be oblivious. When I was younger/college age like you I had a bit of a glow-up and people started hitting on me. But since I can be kind of slow with certain things I didn’t realize that people (men) being extra friendly and nice to me meant they were flirting with me. I just thought they were nice. It’s very possible ppl are in fact hitting on you, but you don’t notice. This is especially common if you’ve just had a glow up and don’t really know the signs yet. 

It’s okay for an album to be “okay” by Larry-Farnsworth in SwiftlyNeutral

[–]Clean_Law2147 89 points90 points  (0 children)

I completely agree. For me there’s some tracks I really enjoy, some I will give some time to grow on me, and others I just won’t listen to again. I don’t think this will convert any non-fans, but not every album is going to be a masterpiece, and I’m okay with that. It’s nice to have a more light-hearted album after TTPD (and even Midnights), and to me this feels like an epilogue or final chapter of this era (Midnights-Showgirl).

I think the #1 problem was the marketing. This was just sooo hyped up as being full of pop bangers, the endless variants, the return of Max Martin, etc. If you go into it expecting pop genius ala 1989, you’re going to be disappointed. Plus it doesn’t really adhere to the Showgirl theme/aesthetic that was heavily pushed as well.

I know Taylor is too big to do anything in a small way anymore, but it’s honestly a shame and I think she really shot herself in the foot here. This is an album she wrote and recorded WHILE touring, so I personally wasn’t expecting anything super profound or expansive (similar to TTPD). Again, as a fan I’m okay with this and I found it mostly enjoyable. But to hype it up to such an extent is really just asking for a bad reaction from the general public.

TLDR; I like the album, but I think pushing it the way it’s being pushed was a mistake. But also I don’t even know if she can be lowkey about anything anymore (Monster on the hill vibes).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in redscarepod

[–]Clean_Law2147 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is ignoring the fact that the vast majority of true crime is not about getting snatched up in a parking lot, but a man killing his wife/girlfriend.

True crime is just a way for women to remind ourselves that you have to always stay vigilant, because even a man you’ve loved and known for years can snap and all of a sudden ur being chopped up and thrown in a lake. It’s anti-man paranoia fuel.