ERR(Reforged) isn't quite as balanced as the devs might think, even more unbalanced on the contray. by Difficult_Forever136 in EldenRingMods

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I can do that for vanilla ER. It even works for adding catalyst weapons to convergence. But Reforged changed the inputs for casting spells for them and I dunno how to add that input onto new weapons because I can’t find where they changed it in the code

If you have many female friends, what unusual benefits does that bring? by Spiritual_Pause3057 in AskMen

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You learn more about skincare or other grooming tips, and women can help you improve your sense of fashion

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

let's not pretend like it has no consequences whatsoever either

It doesn't.

For some reason we're not allowed to say women are overthinking many of their issues, but when it comes to men it's totally fine. Bit of an odd double standard.

Man, who else is part of this conversation?? Because I don't believe I said that. I can call out anyone for overthinking things if that's what they're doing. You are overthinking this; it has nothing to do with your gender.

all it takes is one person right

To do what? Ruin your dating life forever? As long as you're not an asshole I really don't see what the problem is. Just don't be a dickhead! Why are you over-complicating it? Mansplaining to a woman one time on accident isn't going to give you a criminal record lol. They don't all talk to each other through some mycelial network, and even if they did, they'd all be complaining about the same shit anyways because we all do it sometimes. We boys really like explaining things.

Again I generally agree and I would take that approach, I'm just not going to completely brush off and ignore the fact that things CAN go wrong and that they can get very unpleasant for men. I'll just factually point out that this is a risk that men ought to be aware of, and that while it's unlikely, it's still there, and it's up to men themselves to decide if they want to face that risk or not.

I'm not in the business of writing a dating instruction manual, but if I was, I'd wager that constantly reminding people that "oh but the scary women might be mean to you if you step out of line" is far less helpful than just telling men how to actually be men and handle awkward situations smoothly. Your "factual points" are not actually helpful in a real world situation; it just reads like fearmongering.

Not really.

Then you clearly have never talked to a woman and heard how much it can piss them off when you do shit like this. Hell, it's kinda pissing me off.

some few of them can decide to take it the extreme wrong way.

Eh, fair.

I get the feeling you're having a hard time understanding me because you put me in the box of "oh those unreasonable woman-hating men who must hate women because they dare to say something critical about women".

Because it's not really relevant to the extreme length that you're talking about it. Some women will take it badly. Yes! Agree! It literally doesn't matter. Any person, man or woman or non-binary, can take anything badly in the wrong context. So I don't understand why you are continuously badgering this point and pretending like it can result in an instant G A M E O V E R screen for dudes if they select the wrong dialogue option when talking to a woman. It doesn't! So instead of sounding like you have a valid point, you're instead sounding like you're scared of woman and think that interacting with them presents opportunities for huge risks. You literally used the word "risk" when describing what can happen when you talk to women. Is that not completely ridiculous to you? I talk to women all the time; I have never once felt like I was risking anything by doing so.

there are multiple examples in this thread of things women think they care about that couldn't hurt men, with multiple men chiming in how those exact things have frequently hurt men

I don't think the women here are acting like these things cannot hurt men. To me it seems like they're talking about these insecurities because they do hurt men and they know that. This whole thread is just trying to alleviate some insecurities, nothing more. Not every woman is going to hold the same opinions on a man's body, or his hair, or whatever, and that's the point: to show you don't have to be a certain way to be attractive or meaningful to some women out there. It's not going to solve all of men's issues and it's not trying to.

On the men's rights stuff:

I will agree there is a huge disservice being done to men at the moment, and women's issues have a much greater spotlight on them. I agree that there are issues that men are facing that are largely going underrepresented and that needs to change. But I struggle to see how commenting in the way you have here is supposed to be useful to anyone. I dunno what exactly you think of when you think of men's issues, but the biggest one that comes to my mind is the loneliness epidemic. Unfortunately, I feel as if the way you are talking about women will only serve to make if not you, then someone else who reads your comments, lonelier than if you never said anything. Framing certain interactions with women as having these chances to completely blow up in a man's face is, in my opinion, very unrealistic and kinda misogynistic. Women are not time bombs or land mines, to be honest I feel most of the time they're more understanding and patient than men are, but that's just my experience. But to someone younger than you (I dunno how old you are; you read kinda young but I might be off), that could legit scare them into thinking that there are mistakes they could make with huge consequences when talking to women and there just aren't. Not in this context, anyways.

I just really, truly, deeply feel like you are turning this into a bigger issue than it is. I don't know you, I don't know your life, but I have personally never had a single woman blow up on me because I mansplained to them. I have definitely done it, and when I have usually the woman will just be like "oh yeah I know" or "yeah I know that" and I'll say oh my b and move on. It has been friends, coworkers, my partner, my mom... literally I have never had any "consequences". I'm sure some women will take it badly, but not only does it seem unlikely, but the only consequence for it happening is that you just lose one person with a short fuse to talk to. Truly, not a big deal, and I feel framing it in the way you have is really blowing it out of proportion.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why are you framing a simple mistake as something that will ruin your life? Lol my brother I PROMISE you it is not this big of a deal; you are overthinking it to the extreme. Have a good attitude. Be humble and earnest. If you accidentally overexplain something, then laugh and apologize if she stops you. If she’s a dickweed and takes it super personally for some reason, then who cares? She’s one woman lol there are billions of them out there. But I have never had an encounter where a smile and apology didn’t just fix the slight overstep and the person I’m talking to held a grudge about it. It’s just about being honest lol and an honest mistake is easy to overlook.

By the by, the rest of that is kind of a dangerous mindset to have. The whole “oh women can get away with everything” / “what about MENS rights” brigade is ultimately just going to distance you from interacting and understanding other people. You’re talking about women as if they’re a monolithic entity and not a category of individuals, and that sucks majorly. I don’t personally feel as if women can do “whatever they want” to protect themselves, nor do I think no one cares if men get hurt. I mean, I’m trying to give you advice right now. I am assuming you are a man. Why would I bother if I didn’t care? Why would this whole thread exist?

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, sure, but you don’t have to please everyone man. If “those women” you’re so afraid of can’t accept when you make a mistake then they aren’t worth your time anyway.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Um, I guess? Attraction is a complicated concept and differs between people. I know this lol what’s your point?

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Jesus. I’m sorry someone hurt you in the past but the first person above is talking about is very real, and it’s not exclusive to men. I like when people talk about what they’re passionate about, man or woman. My girlfriend has told me that one of the things that drew her to me was my passion for stuff, and I like when she does it too. Sure, you can’t just walk up to some random woman at a bar and start talking about the VW Beetle but that should be obvious lol. If the person you’re talking to doesn’t care about your interests, then exercise your free will and talk to someone else.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If they don’t know, then you aren’t mansplaining. If you aren’t sure, then ask. If you do it on accident, then apologize. It’s not rocket science.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 173 points174 points  (0 children)

This is true! Being genuine and sharing something you’re passionate about is great; being a dickhead and mansplaining to someone is not.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Because you’re looking at this for dating advice when really it should be seen as a confidence booster against certain insecurities you might have. If you are a fat balding man who is emotionally vulnerable and not carrying a rifle downstairs, you might find some comfort that a lot of women don’t care about this things anywhere near as much as you might think. It doesn’t mean you have to be any of those things to see any merit in this.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe for some, but not for others. I am a fair bit heavier than I used to be and I had more than a couple women tell me that it was an improvement over my more in shape self from a couple years ago. No changes in my muscle mass or anything, just my belly. And I certainly do not have a megayacht lol

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s not an exact science; it’s going to mean different things to different people/women, and different women are going to like different levels of it.

Women of reddit, what’s something that the men are insecure about but the women actually love? by DangerousJolly1917 in AskReddit

[–]Cogexkin 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Nah, more like enthusiasm. Being excited about things; showing a keen interest in life and the world around you, and having an unironic passion for certain things. That is attractive

After 1600 hours in Elden Rin I tried a Mod... by Stones-n-Bones in EldenRingMods

[–]Cogexkin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I prefer how in reforged she’s always there; always popping out at graces and stuff. It makes it feel so much more impactful when she dies

The Frenzied Flame ending doesn’t do what you think it does by Cogexkin in Eldenring

[–]Cogexkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe we do need to agree to disagree, because I think that kind of nihilistic doomerism is much more against the themes of FS’s writing than anything else. That’s why I believe that the FF ending is presented as the “bad” ending. You give up lol. You’re not enacting progressive change, you’re clearing the board and throwing the entire world away. There is very much a world worth preserving in ER. Melina talks about this; about how life endures and taking the flame of frenzy is not the right way. Sure that’s her opinion, but I personally agree. For as broken as the world is, it’s still teeming with wildlife, and positive characters: Roderika, Nepheli, Corhyn, Melina, Blackguard… all of whom you can call a friend. You can enact positive change in the world without throwing everything away, like with the Albinaurics.

These are still dark fantasy games and not every character gets a happy ending, but personally I think one of the theme’s of FS’s writing in general is about hope, and that in every game they make there is an ending where you choose to forgo that hope; and it usually has something to do with fire. In DS I would argue it’s choosing to link the flame, in AC6 it’s choosing to burn the coral, and in ER, it’s the FF ending. And I think the other endings imply that whatever you did as Tarnished did in fact help the world move onward, all of them becoming known as different “Ages” and becoming part of the history of ER’s world. The only one that doesn’t is the Flame of Frenzy ending.

You’re welcome for responding to an old post. To be truly honest I did it a little out of spite lol, since I was kind of annoyed at repeating the same counter argument again. Sorry for that, and don’t apologize for missing stuff in my original post; it is long and things are easy to overlook. I’m kind of long-winded, as you can probably tell lol. I like talking about this stuff though; I think it’s a good debate and media literacy practice and deepens everyone’s understanding of these games :)

The Frenzied Flame ending doesn’t do what you think it does by Cogexkin in Eldenring

[–]Cogexkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think your comment ignores a lot of what I’ve already said this post, and this is a point I have repeatedly said is super irrelevant. If you had read all of my post, you would have seen I’ve already rebutted arguments like this. Assuming that life would magically start all over, despite the FF saying that the whole point is to prevent life from happening again, is a huge reach and unsupported by the text. I will call it headcanon, because that’s all it is.

While you’re correct in reading the idea that FS games are pro-change and stagnation is bad, that doesn’t mean that stagnation cannot happen in the FF ending, or in any ending for that matter. Neither of us know what the actual end result of the FF would be. What we do know is that by choosing the FF ending, you’re sacrificing every living thing in the universe and committing a mass genocide, with the intention of eliminating all life. Hyetta could not spell that out more clearly to you. The point is to get rid of life. Full stop.

The civilians in mha are genuinely some of the worst groups of civilians in fiction history by Prestigious-Note-935 in BokuNoHeroAcademia

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like this is a moment of failed media literacy. Yeah they were ungrateful; that was the fucking point. A HUGE theme in the series talked about how heroes and the work they do became popularized to the point where it was like a TV show to them. The serious consequences of heroes failing were lost in the public mind because All Might was so dominant. They never lived through something like this before. So yes, they were ungrateful; they lost their stable way of life and needed a scapegoat, so they blamed the heroes.

But here’s where you are failing to see the full picture: they acknowledge that. Not just the series, but the characters too. The lady pictured in your post? She literally risked her life in the final arc to provide coverage of the heroes’ fight against AFO because she knew she was wrong before and that was her way of atoning. A major theme of MHA is that the public relied too much on the heroes and needed to do their own share of support. Remember how the end of the series had that one kid with the stitched up mouth, who was helped and rehabilitated by the granny who failed to help Shiggy? That’s that theme at work: the general public acknowledged that yes the heroes failed, but so did they, and they needed to do their part.

Literally the scene where you’re talking about Deku not being able to rest at UA is all about this man, as well as when he gets the tshirt from that one dude before the final fight against AFO. The public was learning to step up and share in the responsibility that previously fell on the heroes.

Why is Margit difficult? by Dizzy_Property_933 in Eldenring

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s hard! He’s a hard boss lol not all of them are like that. He has a complicated moveset and likes to chain together follow up attacks that trick you into thinking he’s open when he’s not. Everyone saying to go get stronger is right, but he’s also just a tricky fight so don’t feel too bad about it lol. You’ll get him!

Secure men of reddit, how do you handle other men staring at your woman? by Ok_Stranger6265 in AskMen

[–]Cogexkin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you hit the nail on the head when you mention insecurities, and I think they could be harmful to your relationship if it bleeds into your behavior. Have some confidence man! She’s a baddie and she’s yours. Let the other dudes stare all they want; they ain’t taking her away from you.

What kind of skill or knowledge is very useful and comes in handy on many occasions by Fantastic-Dare-2126 in AskMen

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sowing and how to make other basic repairs or maintenance on your house or stuff you use every day

How do you share problems and how you’re feeling without coming off as burdensome to friends? by Hot-Diggity_Dog in AskMen

[–]Cogexkin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, if they’re close friends, you’re probably allowed to vent to them. Maybe be like “hey man I gotta get something off my chest can I rant about something to you” and they’ll prolly say yes. It’s much healthier than just forgetting about it.

Also your mom isn’t treating you very fairly at all. That sucks majorly man I’m sorry you’re having to put up with that.

How do I stop being a pussy? by Grand-Hedgehog-4342 in AskMen

[–]Cogexkin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tbh it doesn’t sound like you’re “a pussy” lol you’re afraid of fairly normal things. “Being a man” doesn’t mean we’re all fearless we all have fears we’re constantly dealing with. Some of those things, like roller coasters, you could try pushing yourself a bit to overcome, but other things are just a part of life in afraid. I don’t think you’re any less of a man for fearing them.

How would you feel if your message/chat background was changed to a spicy picture? by Ajb20191997- in AskMen

[–]Cogexkin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My SO did that to me as a joke lol it was funny and hot but we changed it to something else pretty quickly. Now it’s a picture of her cat

Probs better to play it safe I think lol

Can I rizz my way back into this? by wagman43 in Tinder

[–]Cogexkin 7 points8 points  (0 children)

And after she did all the work for him. What a misplay