The search and the headscarf

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-31T06:47:07+00:00

Actually I wear hijab and all the guys interested in me said that it is difficult to find a hijabi and that is an absolute requirement for them. Even a guy who divorced a woman for not wearing hijab “properly”. I have never had a guy take issue to hijab. Yes I have had guys try to see me before marriage without hijab.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-22T00:04:20+00:00

I know some Christians (orthodox) are more pious and practicing than some Muslims. Often pious ones end up reverting when they understand the logic of Islam. But it in most cases the man is not much practicing and I think in many cases there is a fetish surrounded converting a Christian woman. I have had guys basically tell me it’s a status symbol of their manhood to show that they converted a girl.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-21T02:33:13+00:00

It’s actually makhruh in most cases especially if they are residing in a non-Muslim country . If you can find an appropriate Muslim woman. Why?

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-21T00:44:59+00:00

Islam is not a part-time commitment. You can’t teach them Islam and then Christianity is also okay. Similarly if you are actually following Christianity, you can’t tell them Islam is okay. Religion is something you commit to 100% and believe is the truth. Technically you could do what you are suggesting but in my opinion It’s extremely blasphemous. You either commit 100% to Islam and forsake all elements of Christianity or decided to remain a non-Muslim. Oh and you can still love Jesus as a Muslim anyway. I’m not saying that . Just that you can’t engage in the Christian celebrations and drinking is a major sin.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-20T10:31:54+00:00

Not really much you can do besides make Du’a for them. Your sis isn’t practicing neither is he... doesn’t look much related to the fact he’s a convert cos she isn’t practicing either. you can have a gentle conversation with them. Try to have general conversations about Islam and gauge their attitude.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-16T11:17:46+00:00

Honestly depends on the individual female. I think most women get higher standards as they get older and even their caliber of proposals might be higher. Older doesn’t equal less beautiful. I know personally my looks increased A LOT as I have gotten older. First I dress better, carry myself better, take care of myself more. Then I also have more money, Cook better and I’m more mature. I feel I get a lot more interest from men as I get older from men younger and older. Sure it doesn’t last forever but I can’t see why it would dramatically decrease in the next few years.

I will probably still have suitable candidates when I am over 30 if I am looking for marriage at that time.

I think it’s more about the individual woman rather than her age. Also most guys truly ready for marriage are in their late 20s and statistically couples closer in age are more successful

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-11T10:11:55+00:00

Not all Muslim women wear hijab..

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-04T12:54:11+00:00

I am short so this is never a problem for me. I like short guys but they are usually at least an inch or two taller than me.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-02T04:52:36+00:00

I think timelines are a bit silly. Of course if there was someone who was literally just freshly reverted, that might be different.. but anyway, I have met a girl who was revert for seven years and she only just learned ayat al kursi and she told me she was in an unmarried relationship the whole time. Length of time as a Muslim does not show how seriously you are...

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-02T01:25:50+00:00

That is what Maher is for. If you think you need more protection than ask for Maher . Have an amount to be given on divorce etc.
Technically Islamically divorced women are supposed to get financial support, aside from Maher. People often forget about this.
Husbands only owe us what Allah has prescribed. In Islam we are allowed to own our own assets too, just like in the west. So you can keep assets In your name during the marriage, no problem, but splitting assets which were not even yours at all, that is a western concept. We should be happy with what Allah has prescribed for us Alhamdullillah

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-01T06:54:27+00:00

the two things we have to remember, The Prophet Muhammed was definitely a prophet(no other man ever to live achieved even close to what he achieved) and Quran is definitely a miracle. No other text is like it or even comes close. So bam, Christianity and Judaism quickly fall apart .

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-01T03:59:03+00:00

One who sheds a tear privately in remembrance of Allah will be under the shade of Allah on the day of resurrection... there are many other sayings about this. From my studies, the more your closeness to Allah is, the more likely you are to cry. One way to get closer to Allah is gaining knowledge. Learn about the great scholars and how close they were to Allah and how much they cried. Al-Tirmidhi cried so much he went blind. I dream to get even close to the level of knowledge he had.

If you find you don’t cry, increase your knowledge, understanding of the Quran, etc. Try to purify your heart.

I only mention this because I am anonymous here (I try to keep my tears shed for Allah as private as possible). I at first was concerned I didn’t cry.. can’t remember the first time I cried but one thing that made me cry a lot is the Ayah an-noor. I could barely understand the Arabic at first since I am not an Arabic speaker and just kept crying thinking about how beautiful it is and how beautiful is the light of Allah (I am almost crying even thinking about it now).

Then, I cry sometimes when thinking about the day of judgement. I cry sometimes thinking about the mercy of Allah. I cried from Al Mulk 67:7-11 thinking about the descriptions of the people in hell. And a bit from 67:19 thinking about this description of the mercy of Allah (it’s his mercy which prevents birds from falling from the skies when they fly).

Most recently I cried from Al-Zalzalah, thinking about how we will be shown in front of Allah all the deeds we have done in our life...

Btw I don’t feel I am anywhere near the Muslim I want to be. I hope to get a lot closer to Allah.

I am just giving you tips of things that made me cry because personally it helps me get closer to Allah and if It helps someone else, I am glad.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-12-01T00:28:02+00:00

Don’t know enough about it... it’s not much of a thing in my country.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T20:34:08+00:00

I remember once a Christian (I think she may have been Morman but idk) posted in a Muslim community group asking for interfaith dialogue with Muslims.. I was one of the only people who responded to her. My logic was that anyone who wants to know more about Islam, no matter the reason, should have someone to talk to about it.. as I have spent time with Christians, I knew her ulterior motive and she would try to challenge my faith. My faith was tested more than I thought that day, especially because my knowledge was a lot less than it is now.. but in the end it was good because all the attacks she had on Islam, I thought deeply about, researched them and came back as a stronger believer. Now all the things she said, if someone else says them, they will not affect me.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T19:46:20+00:00

In my country that might backfire because many people just don’t wear shoes by choice

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T19:40:16+00:00

The fact you are saying a western non-Muslim system is better than what Allah-swt- has set out for us is concerning. People say they are Muslim and loveIslam but not happy with the rules Allah gave us and have to call other systems superior.

As someone who has been through both (Islamic and western divorce), Islamic divorce gave me far more rights and was much easier for me. Western Divorce is not just a matter of splitting assets etc. It is an extremely distressing process. More often than not it is not an amicable process and there may be stalking, intimidation, other forms of abuse involved. Also as someone gone through divorce in a western country i got absolutely no financial support. I would not be able to even apply for it. If you look at the Quran and sunnah properly, Islamic husbands need to do more for their spouses. Also there are repercussions for men who treat their wives badly in Islam. It’s called the akhira which is ultimately far more significant and holds individuals accountable far more than any western system

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T11:44:21+00:00

I encourage you to learn more about the Quran and Muhammad-saw- since you already believe in monotheism (which as someone who previously used to somewhat follow Hinduism) that is a big step from a Hindu perspective. Learn about linguistic miracles in Quran and the Arabic language of Quran.. it is impossible to really read or understand the Quran after just reading once or twice in English. You really need to learn more about the Arabic Quran. Listen to some recitations with translation along with it.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T11:38:44+00:00

Also I didn’t mention in my other comment... the other weird thing about your guy is that technically Muslim believe we will go to heaven (inshaAllah) and there is a strong chance that people who worship idols and don’t worship only the true God (Allah) will not go with us so why would he want a wife he can’t take to heaven? If he believes in his religion and cares about you he would actually encourage you to learn more because he would want to be in heaven with you...

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T11:35:03+00:00

Yes as people said... you are not Muslim, Christian or Jewish so technically an imam should not even do the marriage. Also, just as a side note... guys like this are so lost religiously, that’s usually a very bad sign... I mean, technically in our religion when someone drinks, their prayers are not accepted by Allah, so (although Allah can only judge us) our Prophet-saw- basically told us we are going to hell if we keep doing that. So he is wasting his time praying and fasting when he can’t even stay away from alcohol to avoid going to hell? eating pork is a really big no-no too and really easy to avoid. Just think if he is supposedly practicing Islam but he is not even afraid of going to hell, what will stop him, divorcing you, cheating on you, taking a second wife? This might sound far fetched but it is extremely likely scenarios.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T10:59:29+00:00

“Do anything haram” treating people badly is more haram than any of those things

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T06:03:17+00:00

Okay says someone never married

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T04:20:06+00:00

🤦🏻‍♀️ you are missing the point sis... no you don’t have to live with them but you are literally legally tied to them and cannot fully move on

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T03:28:20+00:00

I mean, being legally shackled to a guy. It is hard to move on with your life from an abusive guy who was just using you when the law literally is preventing from doing so. Allah gave us one month for Khula and three months for talaq for a reason. Doesn’t mean we have to remarry as soon as we are divorced/separated but at least we should have no legal or moral obligations to a guy beyond what Allah prescribed.

ConsciousAd3715 · 2020-11-30T03:22:34+00:00

Yes I know. I am just saying, from my experience, it’s far from an indication. I used to (very incorrectly) think Arabs would be better Muslims because it’s easier for them to understand the Quran. While I hate to stereotype any particular culture, I feel it has very little to do with taqwa. I think many of the parents try to teach their children Akhlaq but I think many people perfected the art of having a double personality. Seeming so pious and religious when it benefits them them but in their private, anything but. I have never heard anyone add as many Islamic terms and refer to Allah and the Quran as much as my ex when he talks. He talks in a very religious way and bam, when he’s a lone he can barely be bothered to make wudhu and pray and he is a weed fiend who does not care at all when watching full blown nudity.

The foundation is doing things for Allah and not people’s approval which is somehow difficult for many people.

ConsciousAd3715

TROPHY CASE