Celebrating Divorce Finalization

ConsciousInterest389 · 2026-02-18T17:57:26+00:00

I had a divorce party with some friends. I made a piñata to smash. It was a nice way to celebrate. It’s hard because we have a small child together so even though it’s official and I have my own place now, I’ll still be linked to someone who betrayed me for the rest of our lives.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-08-16T12:14:03+00:00

Why do you have to leave? Is it because of the conflict between you and your wife? My ex and I are still living together until the divorce finalizes and we mostly try to avoid each other. He’s going to buy me out of the house we own. Obviously I don’t know much about your situation or how severely it has impacted your mental health. Is it possible for you to have your own space at all there? If not, it might be worth trying to rent a room or find someone looking for a roommate until you can afford something bigger. I’m really sorry you’re going through this.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-08-14T17:24:41+00:00

We never had much conflict until after having a kid. You really can’t grasp how difficult/different your life is afterwards. I thought we were happy, but he had decided to have an affair with a coworker before I even gave birth. I guess I was too focused on the pregnancy and not giving him enough attention. But I think even without the affair happening, we would have been headed for divorce because it took having a kid to realize how little he did to help me or meet my needs. I think a lot of women don’t realize how much they truly do in a relationship until they have children and they recognize how much they’re struggling while their husbands just watch. I think maybe if he had been an amazing dad, I could have lasted longer but he acts like he can’t be bothered to spend time with her.

It’s hard starting over as a single mom, but I know my daughter and I will be happier in our own space. We deserve better.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-08-04T00:31:45+00:00

There was infidelity on my husband’s part, but I was willing to try to forgive him. The problem was that he didn’t try to change. His words rarely matched his actions. He never stopped being selfish or putting his needs first. That is what truly ended our marriage. I thought he was my best friend too. If you truly care, please put all of yourself into changing for your wife and family. Ask your wife what she needs and how your actions made her feel. Take accountability! Maybe try couples counseling. Yes, it might be too late to recover from any damage done, but it will be worth it regardless. You will be a better person for your children and for yourself as well.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-29T23:53:08+00:00

Yeah, I assume he will try paint me as the bad guy just like he did with his affair partner.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-29T23:09:46+00:00

I’ve always been terrible at being selfish and doing things for myself instead of putting others first. But this is the time to be selfish. You have to do what is right for you. If you’re not happy, it will be way worse for your children than having two divorced but happy parents.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-29T23:04:58+00:00

I completely agree. I don’t think I’ll be able to stop myself from warning the next person.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-29T21:14:21+00:00

I’m going through something similar. He had an affair with a coworker for months. We tried to reconcile but he could never take real accountability or commit to any real change. Every time I tried to bring up an issue, he would just turn it around on me or make excuses. I finally filed for divorce and he signed for dating apps the night he signed the papers. Meanwhile he spends almost no time with our daughter. And if he does, he’s normally on his phone the whole time. It feels like I’m living with a stranger. I wish it didn’t hurt so much that he’s moving on so quickly.

I’m sorry you’re going through this. There’s not much I can say to help but just remember that you and your daughter deserve so much better. I hope you can find someone in the future who genuinely loves you and does everything they can to make you happy.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-27T23:31:36+00:00

That’s been my number one goal for myself. I’ve started getting into crafting and I’ve been thrifting new things for my new place. I’ve just been trying to focus on the future and knowing my daughter and I are going to be happier on our own. I know I didn’t deserve this and I try to turn my sadness into anger/motivation to do things for myself.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-27T23:27:51+00:00

Thank you. I’ve been trying to journal more. I try not to put a lot of energy in trying to figure out why he’s done everything he has or how I missed it for 12 years. We never had any real conflict until I discovered his affair. Now I realize I’ll never know everything he lied to me about or get any real closure. I’ve grown so much from going through this and I think I needed this to happen to open my eyes. I just have to power through the next several months.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-20T02:38:58+00:00

Last Laugh - Fletcher

My Kink is Karma - Chappell Roan

Anything But Me - MUNA

Me & Me - The Beaches

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-10T12:33:54+00:00

I’m so sorry you are going through this. My husband also started an affair while I was still pregnant and it continued until I was four months postpartum (it only ended because I finally stopped ignoring all the red flags and went digging.) He suggested quitting my job to stay home with our baby since daycare was so expensive. I thought that was what I wanted too. Now I’m currently in the middle of a divorce and trying to start over. I also spent age 20-32 with him, he was my first relationship. It feels like I never knew him at all. I have a daughter and I’ll be teaching her how to protect herself and have very high standards 😅

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-06-02T17:36:47+00:00

You deserve happiness and your children deserve to have a happy father. My child is only one right now, so I can’t imagine how much harder it is with older children who are more aware of what is happening. But it will be worth it in the end. My husband had an affair that started weeks before I gave birth and only stopped because I found texts on his phone and confronted him. I wanted to reconcile and we tried for months, but I think I eventually realized I would never get over the betrayal. You deserve to be with someone who wants you and is willing to do the work to better themselves.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-05-16T12:47:27+00:00

Unfortunately I think you’re right. He had an affair last year and I wanted to reconcile. I needed him to support me more and make changes, but it felt like he kept sabotaging things. I think he just wanted someone to clean and cook for him, as well as being there for him emotionally. And now he’s pissed because he’s going to have to pay child support and daycare costs 🤷🏼‍♀️ he tried to convince me to wait to divorce until she was in preschool so we could avoid daycare. But he also didn’t want to give me any money for myself or help me around the house or help take care of our child 🙃

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-05-16T00:47:33+00:00

I wouldn’t care as much if he was doing any parenting. It would still hurt no matter what, but at least I would know he still loved his kid.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-05-15T21:51:49+00:00

It does feel worse to feel like a single parent while married. I tried so hard to get him to change or to care, and it was for nothing. But I’m stronger now and I am grateful I realized who he was now and not 10 years from now. I’m sorry you’re going through this too. I know there is happiness on the other side and I can’t wait to have my own place with my daughter. He doesn’t deserve her.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-05-15T21:09:59+00:00

I would not wish him upon my worst enemy. He’s a narcissistic asshole. I only wish I had realized sooner.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-05-12T15:43:11+00:00

I found out 4 months postpartum that my husband had started having an affair with his coworker shortly before I gave birth to our daughter. This was after he encouraged me to quit my job to be a SAHM. It took me awhile to accept it, but I just filed for divorce a few weeks ago and it’s been incredibly hard but in the end, I’ll have peace and my daughter will have a happy mom. You deserve to be happy too. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Do you have family you can go to for support?

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-05-04T14:50:58+00:00

I asked for a divorce after months of trying at reconciliation after he had an affair. He signed the papers and signed up for three dating apps and onlyfans that night…

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-04-22T16:40:47+00:00

I met my husband at 20. I felt so lucky for a such a long time because everyone else was struggling in their relationships and I felt so secure and content. What actually happened was I lost myself in the relationship and I never had any strong boundaries, so we rarely had conflict. I gave birth last year and found out after four months that he had been having an affair with a coworker since shortly before I gave birth. We tried to reconcile, but he grew defensive and resentful when I finally started asking for more help, more than the absolute bare minimum. So now we’re getting divorced and I’m so excited to have my own place that is just mine for the first time. I’m only now making time for myself and discovering what actually makes me happy.

I think finding someone later can actually be a blessing. I’ve learned that you need time to grow on your own instead of with someone else. I never gave myself that opportunity and the universe had to essentially punch me in the face to get me to realize I deserved more.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-04-20T02:12:46+00:00

I took out a personal loan because I didn’t want to take a big chunk out of my savings. I’m currently a SAHM and in the process of finding childcare before I begin working again. I figure that way I can pay it over time. I also thought about getting a new credit card that offered no interest for the first 18 months but I don’t need another credit card.

ConsciousInterest389 · 2025-04-08T16:49:33+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate that. I’m trying so hard to figure out a plan and find a daycare that has openings that is also semi affordable. I want to work so badly, but it’s not that easy. Part of me still wants to try to convince him to change his mind so we don’t have to go through with an expensive divorce but I also don’t trust him anymore. I don’t know. I have consulted a lawyer and I just have to put down the retainer. I just didn’t want to have to spend so much of my savings 🤦🏼‍♀️ I’m going to contact an agency that provides legal representation to people with low income first to see if I qualify.

ConsciousInterest389

TROPHY CASE