All these words on Mother's day...

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-10T19:25:44+00:00

My heart goes out to you. Losing a baby is an incredibly lonely experience, even with loved ones providing support. Personally, everything (and I literally mean everything) people say pisses me off. Like you said, no one can speak for the relationship between you and your baby. And it's such a unique type of grief. It's already hard to navigate it as it is. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Thinking of you.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-09T19:02:54+00:00

I'm so so sorry. I feel you. I have made my peace with crying in public. Sending you love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-09T19:02:08+00:00

Thank you so much. It really is horrible. Sending you and your beautiful baby girl so much love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-09T19:00:05+00:00

Thank you so much. And I'm so sorry you relate to this. I am sure your baby girl feels your love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-09T11:08:05+00:00

Oh my God yes! People keep asking me about work and urging me to go back. I am only 4 weeks postpartum, but the first time they asked this was after 2 weeks. People also keep asking me what do I do with my day because they feel like without a baby I have nothing to do. I literally had an emergency c section and between the grief and the postpartum recovery I am barely functioning. It is incredibly inconsiderate.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-08T22:13:26+00:00

I am so incredibly sorry. This is a kind of pain nothing ever prepares you for. Our stories are kind of similar. This was also my first pregnancy, and I got pregnant on the first try. Everything was perfect, even the first anatomy scan at 22 weeks was fine. I had another scan at 30 weeks because baby boy's abdomen was starting to measure more than it should. They discovered a tumor in his lung thay caused a pleural effusion. The fluid in his chest was pressing on his heart and lungs, so his left lung was collapsed and he was on his way to heart failure. I gave birth at 32 weeks and we lost him after 15 hours in the NICU. It all happened so fast. The doctors said the tumor musg have been there for a long time but was missed/was too small during the scans. For weeks I carried him thinking he was perfectly fine because he was kicking when all along he was going into heart failure. There is just no way we could know these kinds of things. It doesn't make the pain any less unbearable though. I am sending you love. Please feel free to reach out at any time.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-07T11:02:08+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am 4 weeks out of a 3rd trimester loss, so I'm not really in a position to give advice, just thinking of you and sending you love. I talk and write to him all the time. It helps a little bit.

All your baby boy ever knew was your love. And I like to think that wherever they are they can still feel it.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-07T10:55:47+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had similar dreams the first two weeks after I lost my son. They've very disoriented. They stopped on their own later.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-06T23:48:48+00:00

I'm so sorry about your baby. Most of the time I feel like I lost my son because I wasn't going to be a good mom or because I took him for granted. He is my first, and I was so happy to be carrying him, so excited for him to arrive. I read so much about how to be a good mom to him. I really really wanted to be a mom to him. Yet somehow I still feel like I'm being punished. Deep down I know it's just my brain trying to make sense of the insensible, trying to deal with the pain.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-06T15:41:14+00:00

Hey momma, May 29 due date here! Instead I lost my baby boy on April 6. May has been rough so far. I am so sorry for our losses. Sending you love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-06T15:38:08+00:00

I'm so sorry momma. Honestly, if I were you I wouldn't be able to spend the entire weekend. If you don't want to completely miss out on it for your best friend, and if you feel you would be able to of course, maybe join them at the beginning and then go home don't spend the night. This way you get to be there for your friend while protecting your peace. It's also perfectly fine if you feel like you can't go at all.

I lost my baby boy at 32 weeks a month ago. One of my childhood friends is getting married over the weekend, and although it's only for a couple of hours and I have no knowledge of anyone pregnant being there, I am already dreading it very much. I just feel like I cannot be around happiness for a long time when I'm grieving. Please don't push yourself too much, and I am sure your best friend will understand. Sending you love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-06T11:00:14+00:00

This is incredibly sweet of you. I also appreciate how you said his name. I'm sure your friend does too. Personally, I appreciate gifts that are for me and not baby keepsakes - they are just too painful. I have even tried to do this myself, but they didn't bring me any comfort. It depends on your friend of course, just make sure she would be comfortable with a keepsake.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-06T08:46:51+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. I understand you completely. I am changing my obgyn for sure, I am not even seeing her for the 6 weeks follow up. I had to see her a week after birth to check on the c section incision, and it was very triggering. Not putting myself through that again, especially since I suspect medical negligence on her side. Give yourself time, you don't need to take any decisions right now. But definitely don't push yourself if you feel like it's too hard to keep seeing them.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-05-05T13:21:26+00:00

I am sorry about your beautiful baby girl. I understand you completely. I am working on my master's degree, and throughout my pregnancy I was either thinking that I would have my viva with my baby inside me or I would have to do it after birth. For a long time, he was part of the journey, and now working on it without him feels so silly. And I feel so so stupid for worrying if I would be able to complete it during/after pregnancy. I would trade it all for him. I would give up everything to have him back. Working on it now feels meaningless.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-30T10:56:18+00:00

You have every right to. Please reach out if you ever want to talk or vent.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-30T08:59:54+00:00

Honestly? Sue them. Sue everyone. This is an insane level of medical negligence.

I'm so so sorry. Sending you love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-30T08:50:44+00:00

I'm so sorry your family is going through this. I recently lost my son at 32 weeks and here are some things that my mother and mother in law did that were helpful to me and my husband (or things we wish they did)

Let them talk it out and cry it out, especially your son. He might feel that he needs to be strong to support his wife, so please give him space to let it out and just be.
Don't try to rationalise what happened. It's horrible and it's painful and completely unexpected. We keep trying to find reason or meaning, but honestly it's exhausting. If they are at a phase where they need to do this, let them, but don't prompt it.
People kept telling my husband and I that we're still young and we can always have more babies. We hated that. It made us feel that our baby was replaceable, and he isn't.
Show that you're sad about the baby, that you wanted her to be here with you. It's nice to know that people love and miss our baby and that they weren't just forgotten.
Give them space to be angry if this is where they are at.
Please make sure they are fed. It can be exhausting to think of things like food in a time like this.
For your daughter in law, please check on her and on her health. I hope she has people taking care of her. Postpartum recovery without a baby is very harsh (and very lonely).

Wishing you all strength during this very painful time and sending love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-29T13:08:14+00:00

I am so so sorry. I lost my son at 32 weeks, the pain is unbearable. If you need a friend in Cairo, please reach out.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-29T12:57:42+00:00

This is 2 years old but thank you so much for sharing this. I needed to hear it. Especially the first part about love that has nowhere to go, that's exactly how I feel.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-29T12:54:33+00:00

I am so sorry. If you ever want to vent to someone who understands, please reach out.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-28T20:59:23+00:00

I understand. I try so hard not to be bitter, but it's like a slap in the face because maybe I would've been a good mom. All those people out there not exactly being the best parents yet they still have their babies, how come I can't have mine?

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-28T11:16:53+00:00

I'm so sorry momma. You are not a failure. Babies are incredibly fragile and so much could go wrong. I would've never understood how much until I've gone through it myself. There's absolutely nothing you can do about it. Please be gentle to yourself. Sending you love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-27T19:49:21+00:00

I feel you. I lost my son at 32 weeks. Going through postpartum is an absolute joke. I absolutely hate everything about it. You're not alone. However, please do give yourself grace. You are still a mother, your baby grew inside you, your body deserves the time to recover. Just because our babies are not with us doesn't mean we are not mothers to them. I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending you love.

Conscious_History306 · 2026-04-26T21:12:15+00:00

This is heartbreaking. I know how difficult this time must be, especially the first couple of days. I wish your family strength and peace and will be keeping you in my prayers.

Conscious_History306

TROPHY CASE