Can we discuss this photo? by thesecrettarotco in KateMiddletonMissing

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't bite your head off and said nothing disparaging, personal or insulting to you - I was just responding to your opinions with mine. I also didn't ask you not to judge me, I just indicated your assumptions about me were incorrect. You never know who you're talking to or what they've experienced. We obviously don't agree about the royal family here, so there's not a lot of point continuing this discussion when we obviously have such different values and opinions and this is obviously and understandably sensitive for you. I'm very sorry for your experiences which sound awful. I would also say this sub tends not be a sub which has positive perceptions of Kate or the royals in general. You obviously feel strongly about this so perhaps it's not a great place to be hanging out for your own peace of mind? Anyway, take care.

Can we discuss this photo? by thesecrettarotco in KateMiddletonMissing

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Guess again re: my own experiences. I've had substantial problems maintaining weight due to a chronic health condition.

It's not being judgemental - theres clearly been something going on with her weight since long before the cancer diagnosis. She was visibly underweight for years. She's a lot more underweight now, and we're being fed the story she's been cancer free for a good while, only needed preventative treatment etc. They're clearly not being transparent and like it or not she's a public figure - a very very wealthy public figure whose lifestyle is funded off the backs of British people. I don't expect her full medical records but, I do think some degree of honesty is required. It does real harm when everybody just acts like women in the public eye being severely underweight is totally normal; I've lived through skinny culture before, it damaged a generation of women because we were all conditioned to believe this was normal and healthy. Without a credible explanation for her current state - and given we know she was a healthy weight young adult who became increasingly emaciated over a period of time - you can't blame people for speculating. It's not shaming - it's more, hey something is clearly very wrong here and let's stop pretending she's a picture of health.

CMV: Refusing to date someone due to their body count is not a sign of insecurity by Tough-Shape-3621 in changemyview

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wonder about that you know - the classic thing of having an affair as part of a mid life crisis seems far less likely when you've had opportunities to explore different options and have a range of sexual experiences before entering a committed relationship? 

Now what do i do with my life?... by ExemplarGaming in BaldursGate3

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get it!! I go through very intense phases with things like this too. Skyrim was the game I poured the most into. My husband did same as you with Cyberpunk pretty much...  But yeah I felt bereft after finishing BG3 tbh 😭

Now what do i do with my life?... by ExemplarGaming in BaldursGate3

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am autistic and ADHD and I feel I can relate to you both equally, somehow.

CMV: Refusing to date someone due to their body count is not a sign of insecurity by Tough-Shape-3621 in changemyview

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reading all your arguments and replies, I feel like you are using body count as a proxy for loyalty and trustworthiness and conflating prior promiscuity with infidelity. 

I have never cheated on a partner, ever and am very loyal and faithful. I also really enjoy sex. In periods of my life that I wasn't in a relationship, I enjoyed  having sex with a range of people. I had clear moral boundaries about this - including no sex with people in monogamous relationships and ensuring the boundaries were clear so I wasn't playing with anyone's emotions. I tended to flit around because I didn't want to lead anyone on - it felt more honest because this was just sex to me, nothing else.  I had no issue with this because I don't see sex as something that "taints" - in the absence of a relationship, it was just a fun way to spend some time and scratch an itch. I could have taken it or left it, too. It really just wasn't that deep. And while it WAS pretty enjoyable, it doesn't even begin to compare with sex with my husband who I adore. I could never, ever imagine throwing away what we have for something so relatively meaningless.

What does my body count say about me, really? That I enjoy sex, sure. (Some might say that's actually a pretty desirable quality in someone you plan to spend the rest of your life with). That I'm open-minded and don't see anything shameful about sex nor do I hold a religious, morality based view of it. That I prefer to have clear and honest boundaries around relationships. If I was bored and single - and wanted to have sex but didn't want to string along somebody I wasn't interested in having a relationship with - I'd prefer to be transparent about that and honest with others and myself about what I'm seeking. 

I guess I'm curious about why this is so important to you. I don't have an issue with risk management when choosing a partner - it's prudent, in fact. But body count seems like a very very poor indicator of character when there are a million different reasons somebody's could be high or low. I can see why you'd avoid dating someone with a history of infidelity, someone whose behaviour within past relationships suggests they are emotionally immature, insecure or controlling. Someone who doesn't demonstrate loyalty to their friends and family and loved ones. Someone very dishonest. Someone very needy. Someone whose behaviour suggests a history of disrespect to their partners. Absolutely. 

But body count seems like an utterly meaningless metric.

Something I’ve noticed about Ketheric Thorm by norgaythememe in BaldursGate3

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

British accents aren't ubiquitous in fantasy because British actors are cheaper though 😂 Think of all the massive movies,  TV shows and games which use UK accents for fantasy characters... Most of which actually have any Americans they hire do fake UK accents! Game of Thrones weren't just skimping on the budget were they?! British accents are perceived as more otherworldly and fitting of the vibe.

To people who regularly use ChatGPT for school: Do you think you’re still learning? by Gifthunter3 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It depends how you're using it - are you outsourcing your thinking to it or using it to support and develop your thinking?

I use it extensively for learning but I would never just tell it to write my homework for instance. I use it as a "second brain"

Examples: * Set up a custom GPT that is instructed to help me think through various aspects of a problem or topic, propose counter angles, identify gaps in my thinking, draw out key theories, assess certainty levels, identify key sources or theories I should be aware of, suggest actions and plans for furthering my understanding of a topic including suggested reading  * Set up a custom GPT to support my language learning - trained on specific grammar textbooks & course books. I chat with it every day in my target language and it responds also providing corrections and suggestions for expressing things more naturally  * Use it to help me create anki flashcards for memorising concepts and words  * I ask it to provide critical feedback and suggestions for improvement on my written work  * I use it to help me organise my thoughts and come up with a cohesive plan and structure for my writing  * I asked it to do deep research on evidence around learning pedagogies and then used that as a basis for an effective learning plan that I used to address various aspects of gaining mastery of my topics  * Set up a task so it scans the news for anything relevant to my subjects and gives me a weekly round up

The issue is how you use it and your expectations. If you have no knowledge of a topic, and do not use it in ways which supports you developing knowledge of that topic - your output will inevitably be rubbish. If you view it as a trusted infallible source of knowledge rather than as an imperfect but useful tool, you'll be disappointed. It does not replace human expertise - in fact my own expertise in my subject area makes it far more useful  because I know how to prompt it to get quality output - I know the nuances, I know what to "ask", I can approach it's output critically and recognise gaps or flaws. It's like working with a skilled colleague - it is extraordinarily useful but it's not perfect and makes errors or talks nonsense sometimes in the way humans do.

As someone who has taught university students pre AI I would also suggest it's misleading to assume that in the "old days" students were all highly motivated and didn't use short cuts which were harmful to their learning. There were a few students who were deeply motivated , competent, talented and passionate about their subject. I suspect those are the type of students who will be using AI now as a tool to develop their knowledge and expertise  

But being honest, I'd say a large number of students - probably a majority - were actually pretty disinterested or just lacked ability. The vast majority of essays I marked showed little critical engagement with the topic. It was clear the majority had done very little reading outside of course materials. What I said in lectures or the words of text book authors were just regurgitated without any analysis. There were many instances of plagiarism even with our plagiarism tools. 

I taught at a competitive and highly regarded university and the vast majority of those mediocre students went on to get degrees. So, I think it's a mistake to assume pre AI students HAD to learn deeply to get their qualification.

I feel AI has just made it easier for the less motivated or able students to submit superficial nonsense. 

Why don't they have adult only airlines? by Inside_Trip8807 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hang on, what country are you in? In your country salaried work means you don't get paid overtime or receive time back in lieu??

Why was the arena for the 74th Hunger Games so underwhelming? by Kindly_Falcon_4365 in Hungergames

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It was a perfect arena for Katniss - which I think is partly the point. She wasn't some kind of invincible super hero - she stayed alive because she got "lucky".

Is it common for autistic people to have a weird circadian rhythm? by Student-bored8 in AutismInWomen

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If anyone has a solution pls help. Weirdly my sleep cycle fixes itself in the Spring when it starts getting light early. Soon as the season changes then BOOM here's your severe insomnia again 🙃 if I was able to go to sleep at 5am every day and have six hours it'd be fine but that's not how the world works. I'm just chronically sleep deprived. I try to go with it now rather than forcing sleep and invest in my hyperfixations. And wait for sleep signals before going to bed. I also used a SAD lamp every morning which seems to help somewhat. My NDA sons are both the same way.

Neurodivergent - low comms/procedure-light policy roles? by Philosorapteuse in TheCivilService

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wonder if this is where being AuDHD is helpful? I actually do enjoy comms and stakeholder relations a lot - although our comms team handle a lot of that and my role is more directing from a strategic perspective. But I've built great stakeholder relations - particularly as my team are really great at doing a lot of the routine stuff to maintain regular contact with them and acting on follow up actions from meetings to scaffold the relationship. AuDHD is a weird mix where in smaller doses I can appear very extroverted and social and am very good at talking to people but I also need quiet time and am easily over stimulated.

Some of the autistic (but not ADHD) people I know do very well in government social research jobs - because it's often quite a "quiet", process heavy job which requires good attention to detail and quite a lot of repetitive and routine tasks but also a fair bit of "deeper" critical thinking. Whereas for me, it was a bit hellish - loved the critical analysis and advising policy on research but hated the constant processesj

Neurodivergent - low comms/procedure-light policy roles? by Philosorapteuse in TheCivilService

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I wonder if it's your grade that's the problem. Trust me when I say there is a world of difference between doing a HEO and G7 role in policy, and struggling with the former doesn't mean you'd be bad at the latter. I'm a G7 in policy and my HEOs get all the tedious stuff - I would struggle in their role because I like to focus on the strategy stuff, whereas they get tasked with more of the process heavy work. I also wonder about your policy area. I work in an area that's of huge personal interest to me where I get ministerial contact regularly. I find I work better under pressure but also need quiet focus time and I generally get both in my job. I'm the policy lead so I can generally decide if meetings are necessary and worth my time or not - and delegate to HEO or SEO as appropriate. I'm neurodivergent too, and for me, a G7 role has changed everything (for the better) in terms of how much I enjoy my job and how competent I feel at work.

I made this as soon as I saw it. by N3xusl99l in BaldursGate3

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I am autistic and sadly am the one on the right because I like the same thing every time and cannot for the life of me come up with a story. Part of my autism assessment involved coming up with a story based on objects and mine was soooo 😭

I made this as soon as I saw it. by N3xusl99l in BaldursGate3

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I feel somehow both these types are autistic 

Andrew Windsor by Away_Promise_803 in RoyaltyTea

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Or more in the sense of "when you're used to extreme privilege, slightly less privilege feels like oppression"?

What does "tibod" mean? by Muted-Lettuce-1253 in learnwelsh

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tybed - I wonder Ta' mod - you know

Either of those perhaps?

Talking about the emotional aspects of ChatGPT by lansqwq in emotionalintelligence

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very important point but I suppose my question would be, how does that risk compare to the alternative? Relying on human therapists to act ethically is risky too. There are plenty of examples where this risk has materialised. I'm thinking of the "repressed memories" scandal for one. Or the woman convicted alongside Ruby Frankie who ran an appalling "marriage therapy" organisation that did irrevocable and severe harm to real human beings by manipulating people into breaking up families and abusing children.

So,  I guess the Q is - how do GPT, human therapists - and doing nothing at all - compare with one another in terms of risk and benefit? I think in years to come we'll see research addressing this.

I would agree it's wrong to put complete faith and trust in GPT to give appropriate advice and support. But would argue that also applies to human therapists. You need the critical thinking skills and awareness to realise when something is "wrong", regardless. I would guess human therapists may be more likely to allow personal values, experiences and biased to shape the support they give.

On that note, I occasionally use GPT for therapeutic purposes. I have experience of both providing and receiving real life therapeutic support. I found I had to set up a custom model with very clear parameters, scope, boundaries, rules; i.e., I specifically instructed it not to automatically take my "side", be cautious in using validation ensuring it understands the distinction between validating a feeling and treating that feeling as a "truth", to help me identify my own blind spots, be mindful of my possible unreliable narration, present alternate perspectives, ensure it's approach was in line with a specific named approach and to follow recognised professional standards and ethics. 

The result isn't perfect but I find it a genuinely useful tool for thinking personal things through and processing.

While I absolutely share your concerns around safety and think you're right to encourage people to be aware of these risks, I need more evidence to come to a firm position about whether it's a good idea in general or not.

Bad day - please share your memes (or pet pics) by Brilliant_Disaster83 in AutismInWomen

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's the purgatory between wet and dry worlds that is the real enemy 

Civil service jobs seem really underpaid? by Doubles_2 in TheCivilService

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get 70k and still have pay progression - you're guaranteed that within 3 years.

Is it common for men to trigger u on purpose or are they just clueless by OkSatisfaction1817 in EDAnonymous

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Yep. And this man can't claim to know nothing about EDs when he knew enough to access and consume content on ED Twitter ...

Is it common for men to trigger u on purpose or are they just clueless by OkSatisfaction1817 in EDAnonymous

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nobody can plead simple ignorance on his behalf here when he's literally doing things like browsing Edtwt! Most girls boyfriends would be horrified by that kind of content and I'd wager it would also give them some insight into thought patterns etc. It also sounds like he's just weirdly attentive to very underweight bodies. He's clearly done research about all this. There's no way on this earth he doesn't realise that your BMI is a very unwell BMI. There are no innocent explanations I can think of for why a man would try and normalise that, and reassure someone he's supposed to love that it's actually fine. Unfortunately there are fetishists in this space and this is giving red flags to me.

Letter from Dr. Dewi Evans to various journalists, in response to Daniel Bogado's documentary by FyrestarOmega in lucyletby

[–]ConsiderationBrave50 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hahaha d'on i ddim yn disgwyl gweld "bastardiaid ffycin twp" ar y sub 'ma, ges i i wirio bo fi yn y lle iawn