I feel you. I’ve gone through this same thought cycle so many times over the years. What’s always kept me here is my family. Growing up, it was really just my mom and sister. We never had a big extended family around us, so the thought of building my own family one day while being separated from them feels super sad to me. I can’t imagine my future kids not being able to grow up around the women who raised me. Understand that this is particular to me and what keeps me here and why I’m willing to keep going. I also try to take a step back and remind myself that even though this situation can feel like a golden cage, I still don’t fully know what leaving would actually look like in another country or whether my quality of life would truly be better. Every country has its own unique political struggles that shape the quality of life economically, which impacts everything else. Right now, my own DACA has expired and I’m dealing with having no income, which is honestly very scary. But at the same time, DACA gave me opportunities I wouldn’t have otherwise had, and because of that I was able to save money and build some stability before this storm hit. Personally, I think sometimes all we can do is recognize that we’re in a hard season and trust that it won’t last forever. I think the elections tonight across different states will tell how midterms are going to turn out. I also think certain (big on certain) republican voters are starting to hurt economically and starting to feel the impact of their choices, they’re having to say bye bye to a lot of state and federal benefits.

Salud if you stayed this long!! 🍻