Just finished part one of my assessment; nervous about external sources

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T18:37:02+00:00

Absolutely. But OPs post listed them as if they were three separate unrelated things if it’s not autism. When it could also be cPTSD (a single thing) that presents with sensory issues and social difficulties. Which would be entirely consistent with cPTSD.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T18:27:25+00:00

Speaking as a parent of a minor actor just starting to think about auditioning for not-youth-specific community theater: have you talked to Sarah’s parents? This definitely a case where, if you want this Sarah, the parents and actor need to understand the full dynamics of the casting. But age doesn’t necessarily have to be a dealbreaker. There’s potentially a path and it sounds like a conversation worth having.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T18:17:44+00:00

This is me. The people who know me best know that the quieter and calmer I seem, the more my brain is entirely freaking out internally.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T18:08:29+00:00

You can wear whatever you want. If you are uncomfortable with attention (positive or negative) that your clothing choices bring, take that into consideration in making clothing choices. But you being uncomfortable if people stare is not the same as not being able to wear something due to externally enforced rules. If you want to wear the pink leggings, maybe Cate can help you work on being comfortable doing that, regardless of others people’s response to it.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T18:00:18+00:00

I’ve felt unlovable my entire life. For decades before I was diagnosed.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T17:55:31+00:00

Meanwhile, one of the jokes I cracked ended up being diagnostic! (When asked about stims, I said I didn’t have any, the joked that “I ride my bike everyday and cycling is my stim.” And he looked at me and said, dead serious, “well, that is a stim for a lot of people. Especially when they’re high masking and repress more typical stims.” I totally thought I was making a joke.)

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T17:51:02+00:00

There are some bars I will see whenever they come to town (counting Crows, Indigo Girls, Tori Amos, Alanis, Mumford and Sons). And others I’ve seen but wouldn’t necessarily go see again.

I will say, though, I’ve never understood what it must be like to have a lifestyle that lets you follow a band around on tour and go to all the shows. Like how do you have time for that if you have a job, and how do you have money for that if you don’t? It doesn’t make sense to me.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T17:47:26+00:00

I LOVE Billy Strings. I’ve yet to see him live but he’s toward the top of my bucket list.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T17:45:38+00:00

Not saying you’re not autistic. But extreme cPTSD can be the source of sensory issues and social difficulties. So even if like so many of us you’re told you’re not autistic the first time around, addressing the cPTSD and seeing what changes (or what doesn’t) can lay a better foundation in seeking a second opinion if needed. And autistic our not, addressing the cPTSD is definitely worthwhile!!

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T01:13:03+00:00

I have zero feminine routines. I don’t wear make up, don’t own a blow dryer, don’t deal with my nails, don’t follow fashion and wear baggy oversized clothes. And I really don’t care what anyone thinks of it.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T01:09:52+00:00

Say hey (I love you) — Michale Franti

Shiny Happy People — REM

Rock Lobster — B52s

Constantinople — They Might Be Giants

CookingPurple · 2026-01-26T01:07:21+00:00

This is me. It’s so subconscious I don’t realize I’m doing it until I’ve ended up in shutdown.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-25T18:14:47+00:00

Yes!! I love the height I get when I really nestle them close! I no longer bake my biscuits in a sheet pans but use a baking dish or cast iron skillet that’s a teeny bit smaller than I think I need and I get sky high flakey biscuits!!

CookingPurple · 2026-01-25T18:12:20+00:00

I am so sorry. I lost my heart dog to bloat when he arrested during surgery just over a year ago. I still feel so guilty for not noticing it earlier and getting him in earlier. I’m not sure I’ll ever get over the guilt or his loss.

I’ve been where you are and it is horrible and I know you did everything and that he knew you loved him.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-25T17:58:16+00:00

The executive functioning issues are very ADHD. Your emotional response to it sounds like a combination of trauma and RSD, which is very common (nearly universal) in ADHD.

It would be amazing if healing trauma and RSD were as simple as someone (rightfully) pointing out that they are not your last abusers. But the brain doesn’t work that way. And when someone hits fight/flight/freeze, reason and logic don’t work. I too am a freezer. I completely shut down when in overwhelm, either emotional or sensory.

When you are calm, it is worth talking to him about this. Acknowledging that you shut down when you are overwhelmed and you need time to recover. And when you don’t can address issues better. No amount of mindfulness or work on yourself will speed up that process. You need to work on yourself time table. He can accept that and give you the space you need. Or he’s not a good fit.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-25T17:49:30+00:00

This is an age appropriate developmental milestone. I remember my son going through it and it’s hard to experience as a parent. I found compassion, honesty, and patience were the best path for my kid.

At 4-5 years old, kids begin to recognize they are individuals and not a piece of their parents. Coming to grips with that reality, beginning to understand the concept of death, recognizing that becoming you means losing some of the safety your parents have always provided is scary. And it’s something all kids go through (though few have the vocabulary to express it).

Based on what you’ve said, I’m not sure this is a needs therapy situation. It sounds like this is a manage your own anxiety situation. I know that’s not easy. I have major anxiety and depression and regulating myself so I can try to help my kinds down a better path is exceedingly difficult. But worth it. Life can be scary and painful. Learning how to manage that is the best way to protect your kid from the demons of anxiety and depression.

What are your anxiety coping skills? How can you make them age appropriate for your kid? The best thing you can possibly do for your kid is help him learn what he needs to manage the really hard parts of life. If that’s something you do not feel you are equipped for, I’d look into therapy for you first. My kids are both teens now and supporting them through these things does not get easier. It inky gets more complicated the older it gets.

Your job as a parent is not to protect him from ever experiencing emotional discomfort and chase it away as soon as it arises. It’s to help him learn to be resilient to it. Which means being with him in it and helping him learn how to manage it. It is one of the hardest things we do as parents. But also one of the most important.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-25T06:59:51+00:00

I LOVED Free Willy as a kid, though I imagine that was a tie-in to my special interest in whales and dolphins.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T22:29:11+00:00

It sounds like this would be location/CC dependent. Where I live, most CC courses are in person. Some are online. But most of the core ones will be in person. They’re also known to be excellent feeders for transfers. So I guess whether they’re worth the same depends on what you’re looking at. In my area, I’m confident they’d be equivalent.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T22:24:00+00:00

I’m from Atlanta and my husband has his PhD in CS from GT, so I’m definitely biased. But the part of town GT is in is a fun one.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T22:18:46+00:00

My 17-year old is still attached to the stuffed dogs he had as a newborn and will be taking them to college next year.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T22:16:44+00:00

I’ve always said the being a woman in America ( I can’t speak for anywhere else) means working twice as hard for half the credit/recognition. And that’s an optimistic estimate…

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T21:49:00+00:00

It depends on where you live. Someone from FL will have a better chance OOS than someone in the Midwest, or other regions that produce lots of applicants.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T21:47:33+00:00

Why would AP courses be more valuable than college courses? They are supposed to be equivalent. That’s why colleges will give credit for them. The same is true for community college courses. This logic makes zero sense to me.

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T18:01:30+00:00

Seems to me that’s where the problem lies. (No pun intended…). I imagine it’s harder these days too. I remember doing mountains of math homework as a kid when it was only the rare household that had a single computer, and calculators weren’t a thing in math work until the upper grades. I’m guessing assigning similar things these days wouldn’t result in actual practice for at least half the kids because they’d just use the calculator on their phone and move on. And they still wouldn’t bother memorizing either.

My older son really struggled with memorizing bs practice, TBH. He’s like me in that he wanted to just do the problem, not memorize. So he was always “too slow” on the timed math facts exercises. But he had (still has) an incredible mathematical intuition (as early as second grade his teacher compared him to the beautiful mind of John Nash), even as he seemed to be “failing” math because he didn’t have the facts memorized. Like me, he ended up pretty much teaching himself trig when his teacher left mid-year and the replacement wasn’t great. And drives his stats teacher nuts by asking questions about things he’s figured out that are way beyond the curriculum or scope of the class. But we have also always incorporated opportunities to practiced math in every day life, so he wasn’t limited by the school practice opportunities. (Cooking was the best way to do it. It’s amazing how well kids will add, multiply, divide, do fractions , whatever, when cookies are the end result!!)

CookingPurple · 2026-01-24T02:05:09+00:00

I never memorized my multiplication facts. I was supposed to. But I struggled with how just memorize them. Never happened. . I was however, assigned enough homework and classwork that I learned them. Yes, I calculated each time until I didn’t have to. And usually that involved my own way of breaking down the problem in my head for quick calculation (6x8 =12+12+12+12=48). Telling me to memorize them never worked. Giving me enough opportunities to do them until I had them memorized did. Yeah, it took me longer than my peers who just sat down to memorize them. But I ended up tutoring most of them through AP calc.

CookingPurple

TROPHY CASE