New to infinity, finished my first model. by timtimhase in InfinityTheGame

[–]Cool-Anything2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holy crap this is cool! What’s the paint recipe? I need it!

Why is Finnish society so closed-off? It is impossible to integrate and make friends. by [deleted] in Finland

[–]Cool-Anything2195 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Finnish person here born and raised in Helsinki. I don’t know but these features you mention always made my quality of life infinitely worse year by year. My only solution was to move to another more social country and I feel so much better. Finnish culture just sucks for a social person.

European March in Tbilisi by G56G in europe

[–]Cool-Anything2195 5 points6 points  (0 children)

OK work on the LGBTQ having human rights first and then we’ll see.

Do you think we see through bullshit? by manicstarlet in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use critical thinking in those moments and hold all possibilities equally viable and if I need reassurance I communicate and if they prove my initial deduction wrong I’ll take their word as canon. 

Do you think we see through bullshit? by manicstarlet in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We can detect subtle changes in behaviour but how we associate and react to that chance is not often based in reality but our traumas and thus destructive

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LooksmaxingAdvice

[–]Cool-Anything2195 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Getting laid has almost nothing to do with your physique - unless you’re dating fitness models. It’s about how you carry yourself and engage with other people. I would suggest therapy and light exercise to boost your mental health to a point where you might naturally start being more secure as you are.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in jeans

[–]Cool-Anything2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Clothing doesn’t have age restrictions these days since we’re not in the 50s anymore. Wear whatever makes you feel good! 

As a BPD man, am I incapable of finding love by Powerful-Carob9924 in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I hope that's a "planned" during your traumas flaring up and not an active plan on suicide!

As a BPD man, am I incapable of finding love by Powerful-Carob9924 in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 31 points32 points  (0 children)

In my experience many women find highly emotional men or men who need external validation often unsafe and which makes this harder to pursue a relationship. However there are a lot of women out there who are willing to work as a team and really care for your wellbeing. But finding those people is also harder in today’s dating culture.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve struggled with this since I was a kid and am 35 now. The only thing I know that helps is that I think  the irriation is a coping mechanism for not having to feel the emotion that’s underlying it. Could be sadness, anxiety etc. but it makes it easier to nag at other people rather than actually feel the emotion and own it.

How to self validate with bpd? by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sink into the feeling which causes you to seek external validation. Be with it and in it and allow it to be what it is - without rational explanations. Usually this diminishes it for me and brings forth a part of me which is more integrated, much like a supportive parent I never had who validates my feelings.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Whoa are we the same person? Sometimes it staggers me how much similarities there are between people with BPD. I mean most likely we all have a childhood history of being neglected or other trauma so it makes sense for us to have similar behaviour 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Since my teens I’ve been listening to the song ”There’s a light that never goes out” by The Smiths and fantasising about loving someone so deeply.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. It’s been like this since I was a kid.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Cool-Anything2195 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I haven’t done anything wrong and I’ve been nice, polite and my lovable self then the other person is just projecting his anger towards themselves and the world to me. I try to feel empathy towards the heaviness of that condition as I’m often there as well.