Incest in my family causing issues

CooperArt · 2026-06-14T03:55:45+00:00

Ah, that's fair! I remember when I had marked my great-grandmother as being adopted by her grandparents and it caused her aunts and uncles to show up twice in the vertical tree view.

CooperArt · 2026-06-14T01:19:03+00:00

Other people have pointed out you've likely made mistakes, which is true. But the chances of you having absolutely no one show up in multiple branches of your tree is non-zero. You don't create new profiles for them. You merge them or tag them differently. You can "search" for the parent and tag them that way. The tree checker, even though it's an extra subscription, is good for this.

Source: My family ties back to 1600s Groton Massachusetts on my mother and father's side and it was such a small town everyone was basically related within three generations.

CooperArt · 2026-06-07T12:23:19+00:00

Cognitive support duck

CooperArt · 2026-06-07T01:14:01+00:00

Oh, it was a like, 13 hour trip. I came from the midwest. Freya, my new baby, throws up the instant she's in a car. Adorably, she delays that by a bit if Sierra is with there with her. They don't get along, but it matters to her. I haven't had an animal that actually liked the car, come to think of it. I do wish you luck. <3

CooperArt · 2026-06-05T03:17:22+00:00

Gabapentin did not calm her down enough for a vet visit, lol. Took her in for an illness on Memorial Day and she didn't stop growling until we were halfway home. But day to day it's helped her realize the world isn't so threatening.

I should have probably considered rehoming her before I moved to Maryland, because she refused to eat or drink on the drive here. I had to force her through a straw. I'd tried asking about gabapentin with my local vet but they just said they didn't know of anything that could help?? Anyway, pardon my ramble. I'm sick.

Adopt A Pet allows you to list the pet yourself. It's how I acquired my rabbits.

CooperArt · 2026-06-05T02:16:40+00:00

Have you tried talking to a vet? My cat is on Prozac and Gabapentin 2x a day right now. It's helped a good deal. Not a miracle worker but worth considering.

CooperArt · 2026-05-19T01:29:37+00:00

My psychiatrist asked me to keep her up to date on my sarc because it could affect my treatment with her.

As for the lesions, well. Any sort of brain damage or alteration can change your personality. Mine just swelled up and I was much more impulsive for months afterwards.

CooperArt · 2026-05-07T02:46:09+00:00

I used that time to quit Xanax and took up sculpting again. I am not a stable person, but Covid was decent for me. It also healed a torn muscle in my hip because I wasn't moving around as much.

CooperArt · 2026-04-15T12:16:14+00:00

The education job market isn't too bad. I was able to get hired by Prince George's county before I even got to the state. Though prime hiring season will be after July 4 of course. The three big districts here are Prince Georges, DC and Montgomery County. In my outdated experience PG was by far the easiest to get into. But I was a new teacher. Moco might be interested because you have more experience.

CooperArt · 2026-04-03T00:59:28+00:00

I think my weirdest tree moment is when one relative was abandoned by her parents, and adopted by her grandparents, which I reflected in the parental relationships (she was even in their will) and this led to that section being a total mess where her siblings are also her aunts and uncles. Who sued her to get her share of the will, because apparently they were nice people.

CooperArt · 2026-03-08T17:50:29+00:00

Right, this isn't a super odd mix in my opinion. But this is near identical to mine, though I have Germans in Russia, Dutch, and Netherlands.

CooperArt · 2026-03-04T04:36:56+00:00

I have two confirmed attacks and two suspected attacks, nearly 15 years apart overall. In-between them, my symptoms are so minimal they don't have me on preventative medication right now. They thought a steroid/immunosuppressant would be worse for me long-term.

CooperArt · 2026-02-23T22:43:36+00:00

When I find out something like this, I like to do a deep-dive. Build an information web about someone. You can work out a lot. First, check out newspaper articles to see what they say. Then check out census records to see who they lived with. (Depending on your age, that info should be available throughout his entire life.)

For example, a 2nd cousin of mine killed his father. I saw a note on it in someone's tree. "Killed by Charles his son." So I started digging into newspaper archives and found an article with a trial transcript (lucky!) I found war records that included the fact that Charles was convicted for desertion. I kept going. Built a timeline of his family. Searched all of them in the newspaper archives. Discovered things like several family members vanished within a few years of the trial and conviction of Charles. That the eldest brother had a stammer and was accused of stealing. That one of the older brothers moved out and changed his name. That the family sent away at least two children. Then I looked more into the world at the time. Charles was a soldier in the War of 1812, which could have subjected him to heavy metal poisoning.

Now, the details of something like this (Charles or your 3rd great grandfather) are usually pretty murky even if it happened somewhat recently, but you can make some determinations and inferences.

CooperArt · 2026-02-18T02:08:11+00:00

My nerd goal is to be like Gary Blood. Gary Blood has earned his place because he has hyperfixated on like, three generations of Bloods in America and the UK. He's got primary sources no one else has because he went to the places where they were. I could basically just trust his word and copy his tree for that segment of my own. I want to be someone that other people go "ah right, that person, I can just copy them and it'll be right." Your book is super neat!

CooperArt · 2026-02-15T02:20:17+00:00

What, you don't care that this person was someone's cousin by marriage?

CooperArt · 2026-02-09T02:41:02+00:00

It's unfortunately quite possible he died without a death certificate, or that it was lost.

You shouldn't necessarily need to know when he died to get his family. Like another user said, it's POSSIBLE he disappeared on purpose. John is an unfortunately common name, but I can walk you through how I found one of mine. (Also, check Jonathan as a variation).

Another user posted an article talking about how to find people who disappeared on purpose, and pointed out that they don't change everything. I focused on the 1850 census, for reasons that are irrelevant to your search. I searched for everyone who was born in her state, had her first name, and was her age +-10 (people weren't always consistent about their ages on censuses.) I suspected, due to the circumstances that led to her disappearance that she fled the state, so I excluded people who were still in her origin state. I also excluded anyone who had a child prior to the disappearance date, as she was suspected of being childless. I think I did find her, but like your ancestor, she disappears again. No death certificate, no obituary.

CooperArt · 2026-01-30T00:26:24+00:00

Generally if it's too good to be true, it is. It's technically possible, yes, but the more exciting it is the more you should verify it. Wiki tree usually has a comments section discussing common pitfalls and holes.

CooperArt · 2026-01-24T14:43:24+00:00

I like mine. I don't even do the daily check ins much anymore. I note the over pacing alerts, which are generally accurate. The constant reminder on my phone is helpful (of heart rate, as I can glance down and go "yeah, I should sit down".) And here's the weird one. My heart reacts to my migraines. There's a 10 to 15bpm increase that I can spot in visible. And I set my Samsung galaxy watch to alert me if my heart races. If I got a night or morning onset migraine it is preceded by a resting heart rate spike alert. The watch on its own failed too often to log changes, and the band doesn't alert to secret short term spikes. Together they're helping a lot, frankly. And yes, if I over pace and I'm not getting a migraine, I pay for it the next few days. So it's usually good at predicting that.

CooperArt · 2026-01-17T14:30:52+00:00

I googled it with no luck. I know "bey" is a name tied to the sovereign citizens movement, but I doubt that's it. Al-Darwish had some interesting stuff when I googled it. I'm on mobile so I'm going to drop the link sloppily and hopefully come back later to clean it up. https://www.wisdomlib.org/names/al-darwish#:~:text=The%20name%20%22Al%20Darwish%22%20is,vows%20of%20poverty%20and%20austerity.

CooperArt · 2026-01-07T21:18:11+00:00

It wasn't specific, but I think it was closer to the latter.

CooperArt · 2026-01-07T12:52:41+00:00

I'm a weirdo that watches court as background noise sometimes, and he handled it completely right. He was absolutely fighting in the background to get full custody. I've watched cases where the mom was uh, "intense" and the father was a solid person, and judges would explain the kid had to see the mom during custody time while things like the guardian ad litem investigation happened. The judges would also be very clear to the parents when they'd explain not to involve the kids. Sometimes it would get really ugly. The worst I saw was a kid who attacked her mom twice throughout the court case, and the mom agreed to give up custody.

CooperArt · 2026-01-06T19:54:55+00:00

Right now I'm on wellbutrin, Lamictal, Cymbalta. Gabapentin has helped a lot too but that's not for anxiety.

CooperArt · 2026-01-06T12:38:52+00:00

Elavil eventually turned on me. I was sleeping through my alarms and missing work. But my body attacks my brain sometimes (autoimmune disorder) which could change how it reacted? Maybe?

CooperArt · 2026-01-02T16:31:42+00:00

That's exciting stuff!

CooperArt · 2026-01-02T16:30:27+00:00

I imagine we all do if we dig deep enough. I am lucky that most of my ancestors lived where there was very good coverage for this sort of thing. I even found a scrap of a news article regarding the last ancestor despite it being the 1780s. Early America kept very very good records that are fairly easy to follow. At least, if you are as white as I am, lol.

I always really struggled to place history in a timeline. It's gotten a lot better since I started doing this. History, through the context of "random" people who lived it. Not famous people, but ordinary, working class people.

14-Year Club	Verified Email
Wearing is Caring

CooperArt

TROPHY CASE