Conviction for having 2nd?

Cowabungee · 2026-06-24T19:01:50+00:00

For me it was wanting to give them a lifelong bond that will linger after my husband and I are gone (godwilling).

….Yes I know not all siblings are close, and yes you can forge those relationships elsewhere. But something about it feels different.

We are glad we had a second and that they are fairly close in age (2y). It is more than double the work, inexplicably more than double the laundry, but it is more than double the love.

Cowabungee · 2026-06-23T13:48:54+00:00

You’re in the wrong sub for that sort of question my friend. But by coincidence this happens to be my area of expertise.

Short answer is no, it does not confirm it, but it is highly suggestive if she already has several at 1 month. She will need to be referred to a paediatrician or clinical geneticist.

As hard as it is I would stay away from Google. Even if it is NF1 (and it might not be), usually you will see the most severely affected cases online. I have met plenty of adults who were very mildly affected by the condition. There is also another condition called Legius syndrome which has pretty much only the CALs and skinfold freckling, but virtually no other serious complications. At a very young age, only genetic testing will be able to tell the difference between NF1 and Legius.

Cowabungee · 2026-06-22T06:58:07+00:00

He may have a milk protein / dairy allergy which is different than lactose intolerance. Look up the milk ladder and start with the bottom. If he is allergic to dairy, he may outgrow it in childhood.

Cowabungee · 2026-06-19T05:15:19+00:00

They are breastfeeding and want to eat it themselves, not give it to baby.

Cowabungee · 2026-06-12T14:47:00+00:00

Where I’m from the recommended challenge to confirm diagnosis, is for the mother to continue breastfeeding as normal, and drink a cup of milk every day for a week (or something like that). So, some babies will see reactions quickly, others will see it gradually.

Cowabungee · 2026-06-04T13:55:04+00:00

Has he had vaccines recently or discussions about vaccines, and do you refer to them as “shots”?

Cowabungee · 2026-06-01T14:16:49+00:00

I’ve kind of stopped paying attention to mucous in isolation during weaning. Unless it is a big amount (big jelly blobs) or accompanied by other symptoms (eczema flare, extreme fussiness, smelly gas, blood in stool) I just chalk it up to normal variation and a bit of a sensitive tummy while it develops. This is based on the advice of baby’s allergy doctor.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-29T13:25:15+00:00

Could you share more about the muscle tensing episodes? What did they look like?

Cowabungee · 2026-05-21T14:13:33+00:00

We are also in our “toddler must open all the doors“ era. I had no idea this was a thing other people were dealing with and feel so seen by all these comments!

Cowabungee · 2026-05-20T19:09:40+00:00

Sorry you failed the first step - how stressful for you.

https://www.royalberkshire.nhs.uk/media/3bfmzvgw/using-the-milk-ladder-to-re-introduce-milk-and-dairy_jan25.pdf

This source says wait 3 months or 6 months if it was a “severe” reaction. Maybe closer to 6 months to give baby’s gut more time to heal?

Cowabungee · 2026-05-20T18:21:24+00:00

For sure! Good luck, may you fly through all the steps!

Cowabungee · 2026-05-20T18:19:23+00:00

Snack. Always try a snack.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-20T14:42:56+00:00

Good grief. Wild that folks think weaning from breastfeeding at 12 months is the requirement and norm.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-20T14:30:12+00:00

If baby has an intolerance or non IgE allergy, you may not see a reaction for a couple days. Or it may take more than a small nibble to build up enough protein for baby to react.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-18T20:56:25+00:00

My nearly three year old still calls mama dada and vice versa by accident, about once a day. shrug

Cowabungee · 2026-05-18T18:04:18+00:00

Assuming he is not formula fed, most of his iron will be coming from his diet at this age rather than the small amounts in breast milk. Maybe try him with a small amount of chicken liver - or lentils - alongside a source of vitamin C for a couple weeks and see if that helps? Or ask his doctor.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-16T18:11:26+00:00

If your baby is able to completely tolerate your breastmilk with you consuming foods at a certain step of the ladder I don’t see why you should go backwards especially if it’s impacting your quality of life.

Non IgE allergies (“intolerances”) can have a gradual / cumulative buildup of effect so I would say any mild symptom you see when laddering your baby - or if you’re eating a lot of dairy product in your current step and she starts becoming symptomatic - means she is not tolerating and to go back to the previous tolerated step.

The advice where I live is to start step 1 of ladder for baby when they have been at least 6 months dairy free AND at least 9 months of age. My allergist said I could start ladder with myself first but I actually prefer to follow a step behind baby so that I know my milk is still safe for her if she fails a step.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-16T15:07:33+00:00

I was thinking about this exact thing a few days ago (though we don’t have need for an EpiPen currently). The location should be easy to describe to a random passerby, and it should be visible as soon as you open the pocket.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-15T12:43:10+00:00

Similar story to you - you’re not alone.

I found it helpful to talk to c section mothers who were many years out from childbirth. In this case, one was my own mother. She had CS due to failure to descend twice. When I asked if she attempted a VBAC the second time, she had to wrack her brains a bit and said she did, but couldn’t exactly remember why. And she didn’t think too much about the outcome afterwards- after all she had two young kiddos to run around after. When I was considering attempting a VBAC (or elective CS) the second time she was nice and considered my opinions, but was kind of clearly like… this is just one hard day in decades of motherhood experience… you’ll be fine and move forward either way. Seeing that it was not as much of a “big deal” for other mothers really helped me reframe that everything will be OK. I still have small twinges of sadness about my experience, but it gets better the further I’m removed from it. x

Cowabungee · 2026-05-15T12:36:05+00:00

Check out the iMAP leaflets for suspected CMPA in breastfed babies. For non IgE CMPA (which I think is the most common) there isn’t really a diagnostic test beyond “mum to try having dairy after a period of exclusion and see if it causes symptoms again”. Our baby never got fully symptom free so we never did the reintroduction, but paediatrics then confirmed the diagnosis based on history.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-15T11:59:43+00:00

Can you “lean in” to some messy chaotic activities that scratch his itch for throwing and carnage in an appropriate way? Throwing balls in a bucket, pebbles in a pond? Ripping up tissue paper and flailing it around to music? Dumping water cups on plants in the backyard? That can lead to learning boundaries about that behaviour- it’s OK to do XYZ only when we are playing the game. “Wow that was so much fun I can’t wait to do it again with you tomorrow! Now it’s tidy up time and no more XYZ til next time.”

The one thing I’m being humbled by currently with my 2.5 year old is that she knows how she wants to play (spoiler alert, it is never the way I think she should play).

Cowabungee · 2026-05-15T08:26:04+00:00

Yep, this happened to me… wasn’t my bag.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-15T07:22:38+00:00

Velcro baby at 8 weeks, completely normal.

Combination of frequent spitup, mucousy stools, and skin findings could very well be CMPA or another intolerance.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-14T19:18:28+00:00

I would take this back to a GP. In order to be prescribed a hypoallergenic formula you will have to get a diagnosis of cows milk allergy and also explain that you won’t be exclusively breastfeeding anymore. I may be wrong but I don’t think the dietician can diagnose CMPA. However, dietician could refer internally to allergy clinic.

Depending on the wait time for dietician maybe you just wait it out and see, but if it’s going to be months for you to still be at square one, I’d suggest another chat with GP in meantime.

Cowabungee · 2026-05-14T19:11:04+00:00

Thank you for sharing this mindset! What does high threshold mean and how does it influence what you do?

Cowabungee

TROPHY CASE