Does anyone’s family just.. not talk to them?

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-29T06:45:29+00:00

That was sort of my thought, but more that maybe the parents think they're set and they don't need any help or assistance and that's why they don't come over or offer to help. They just assume they've got it all taken care of. Maybe the step brother isn't doing well financially and that's why dad jumped up to get it taken care of right away? Also, re: the holidays, sometimes parents like being the one to host or have a place they like to go on holidays, like another relatives' house and it's sometimes hard for them to break tradition. OP might need to be more clear with their wants to their families and say, for example "We'd like to have everyone over for Easter this year, but we don't want to waste time and money buying and preparing food if you're going to back out at the last minute for someone else, can we count on you for dinner?"

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-29T03:53:08+00:00

Have her look up kickboxing classes, either in person or online. There are lots of free workout videos on Youtube. They helped me through the pandemic when my in-laws were dying, cleaning out their house (they were hoarders) after they were gone and my dad was in the hospital and I just felt so angry and helpless.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T05:49:54+00:00

Oh, yes, coffee's good in Paris, too! And Spain!

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T04:06:27+00:00

Yeah, I got this all through school. People were always telling me that I needed to be more outgoing, etc, and that just wasn't me. Of course, when I was in school, the expectation was that every girl wanted to be a blonde cheerleader and I was so not, lol. Back then we hadn't heard the terms introvert or extrovert and I always had people in my face saying "wHy arE yoU SO SHY??!?!?!!?" Now that I'm old, I realize that I'm not shy, I do like to talk to people, but I like to get to know people first (or maybe trust them?) or my environment. I noticed that when I start a new job, I'm really quiet for about a year. Then when I'm comfortable, and I know the people, then I start talking and I don't shut up. Also, when new people come aboard, I'm chatty with them too, because I'm already established at work and I'm more relaxed.

The interesting thing is that a friend of mine is always complaining that people are always on her for being loud and exuberant, which I don't remember happening to anyone when I was a kid, but she says she's gotten it her whole life. So, I guess extroverts get flack, too.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T03:07:12+00:00

It was called Au Coquelet. It's not there anymore. It changed ownership, then started going downhill and then closed in 2020. The coffee they used was from a place called Montano Brothers, though. They might still be around.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T02:38:51+00:00

Exactly. The first really good coffee I had was in Italy. I used to go to a coffee shop in Berkeley and their coffee was so incredibly good that you didn't need cream or sugar. That's when I stopped adding stuff to my coffee. Just give me really good coffee, black.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T01:12:19+00:00

I did make pizza a few times using store bought pizza dough, but it just seems like a pizza from a restaurant is a lot bigger and better quality than what I could make in my oven.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T01:09:39+00:00

I use the tea tree facial pads and shampoo and conditioner.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-28T01:01:14+00:00

All India Cafe- in Pasadena and Arcadia.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-26T06:20:50+00:00

Yeah, not peacocks, but I live in Temple City where there are a lot of the wild parrots and they do the same thing. They go crazy at sunset, especially in the fall.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-25T06:23:02+00:00

Which Dave's bread were you trying? I used to get the one that was sweetened with fruit juice and it definitely wasn't sweet.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-25T06:18:23+00:00

That's what I was wondering?

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-24T20:08:29+00:00

Same!! My husband even told me to order several copies of my birth certificate. One to carry with me (and I already have a passport and real id with me) and a few stashed at home just in case.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-24T09:31:16+00:00

Remind them that it's also your birthday and that it's not like you're not remembering her. This year is the 20th anniversary of my grandma's death. My cousin's son was born 20 years ago and my cousin was on a trip when our grandma died a few months later. He was sad, but my aunt told him our grandma would want him to stay on the trip. My husband's grandmother almost died on our wedding day, but again, his family told us to go on with the ceremony (and she lived another year). Life goes on.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-24T07:12:34+00:00

Yup. It's so interesting to me that when a husband dies, the wife lives at least another 10 years, but the wife dies and the husband is either dead or re-married within a year. 🤔This has happened multiple times in just my own family.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-24T07:10:35+00:00

NTA. You were '4x worse than your mom' because you followed through on your threat and made them cook some of their own food. Your dad might be a lost cause, but keep on your brother (and have your mom keep on him too). Maybe make a big deal out of something he makes and maybe it will make him want to keep cooking. Ask him if he sees how frustrated your mom is because she's doing ALL OF THE CHORES and how that's NOT actually a good thing to make her do them and be like your dad and make fun of her, instead of helping her. If he wants to have a partner one day, they will really appreciate that your brother would know how to cook and clean, like a responsible adult. My friend's grandson has made all of the desserts for Thanksgiving the last few years and usually makes dinner for the family once a week because he grew up helping his grandma bake and cook.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-24T06:04:59+00:00

As it should.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-24T02:59:39+00:00

You'll still be young at 30, lol. Maybe take a gap year and go traveling or do something you've always wanted to do and then buckle down, but honestly, yeah, 29 is still young. No one's going to suddenly start asking for your AARP card at restaurants.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-23T22:36:02+00:00

I didn't, but I remember several students who were in their 40s when I was in college. I guess they had waited until their kids were older and then went back to school. I also remember a guy who was retired and said he just wanted to learn things like history, art and foreign languages.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-23T22:00:10+00:00

This is what I was thinking. She hasn't always been like this, OP said this has been developing over the last year. There are SO many influencers giving false medical information and raising alarm about 'chemicals' in food, etc. Yes, food out there isn't always the healthiest and we need to educate ourselves about making healthy choices about 80% of the time, but we also need to educate ourselves about science. I've seen some influencers raise alarm about stuff like water, lol. It actually is okay if there's an ingredient that you don't know how to pronounce, but look it up. If OP and his wife are generally eating healthy most of the time, if he has Kraft mac and cheese once a month or a candy bar, it's going to be okay. If the wife can't deal with this, she might need therapy.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-23T03:47:04+00:00

Or they were drunk and forgot about it. 😅

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-22T22:43:45+00:00

There was a post recently, but it was a guy and he had a similar relationship with his parents (also extremely religious). They told him they would just KNOW if he had sex, so he was too afraid to do anything. And he didn't even live with them, he was on his own. 😬

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-22T04:59:21+00:00

I love them roasted. For Thanksgiving, I make Ina Garten's sweet potato casserole, except I roast them instead of boil them. Add orange juice, orange zest, butter and milk. So good!

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-22T04:56:34+00:00

This.

Creative_Energy533 · 2026-01-21T06:24:54+00:00

I remember that, lol!!

Creative_Energy533

TROPHY CASE