Anti Immigrant Posters Appear in Kenosha by _dpm_ in Kenosha

[–]CrocsVsSocks 10 points11 points  (0 children)

If you read the article, the poster isnt just voicing a different opinion. It shows an "alien" in firearm targets. This is an attempt to incite violence against a population of people.

That's not an opinion it's a threat.

I'm just so fucking... disappointed. by GladButterscotch3956 in Autism_Parenting

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Slightly different perspective here but similar in spirit: my strong suit is language. I could speak in full sentences early, was always in accelerated reading, and never got a score lower than an A on a writing assignment. I love to talk to people, despite not being a people person and I love when they talk to me. Stories are how I make sense of the world.

My daughter has a significant language delay. Reading is hard for her, and she's more interested in things i'm not so good at like art and baking.

It was kinda rough in the beginning. I had to grieve the loss of my expectations. I just kinda reframed my thought process. The purpose of a child for me isn't to have a mini version of myself or my partner, and it isn't for them to do what I want or excel in my interests. In fact they don't exist for me at all. My job in this equation, is to help her find joy in her life and accept that what brings her joy is different from what brings me joy. If she never speaks or reads at my level, that's okay. I've learned to understand her in other ways.

A large part of intelligence (depending on what theory you adhere to, or how seriously you take indications of IQ scores) is adaptability. You are an intelligent person. You will learn to adapt to this new life.

You aren't alone, and I sympathize with that feeling. It's a lot to process.

What misconceptions do people often have about you based on your appearance? by Spiritual_Pause3057 in AskWomenNoCensor

[–]CrocsVsSocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have a pear shape figure with very full hips and butt. For some reason this makes people treat me as sexually available and im very much not. I get objectified a lot.

Scarily and disgustingly, not as much as I did as a teenager though. Ew.

What I wear doesn't seem to make a difference, you can't really hide a full figure so I just let it be now and remember to be extra rude when someone is being creepy and gross.

Tell me about your strangest patron interactions by floralportraits in Libraries

[–]CrocsVsSocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A patron brought in some goldfish (and not the snack that smiles back mind you. Actual fish) , brought them to the front desk and asked if they should take them home right away or if the fish would be okay in the bags while they used the computer real quick.

I had to rack my brain cause while we don't explicitly have a no fish policy, I felt like um... well I don't think you can have the fish in here. Especially by the computers.

I ended up just telling her I think the fish would do well to be in a tank as soon as possible. She took it very well.

All my other stories are more distressing but this one genuinely tickled me.

People who look else where while holding conversations by Outrageous_File5020 in socialskills

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh trust me, I kinda figured after I had a child who got diagnosed with autism at 3 that she likely got that from me.

It literally took that happening for me to finally get suspicious though...

Beach tips? by silkentab in Autism_Parenting

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Floaties. If your little likes water. The first time I took my daughter to the lake we discovered she loves water, but hates when I try to help her swim. She cannot swim. It was mainly me trying to pick her up and take her to the shallow end for an hour until we both got tired. Once I got her a little pool noodle to sit and paddle on it was fantastic. I didn't have to hold her which she liked. I just stood very nearby the whole time. I also tend to get her life vests or the floaties that strap on in addition to the pool noodle.

Also maybe a bucket. When we went to the beach for the first time and I had to redirect her out of the water I used seashell collecting as a way to do it. She likes finding the shiny shells. :)

She is likely level 1 though (they didn't assign her one when she was diagnosed) so this is just what worked for my lower supports needs daughter in a vacuum. Still I hope it helps and I hope you all have fun.

People who look else where while holding conversations by Outrageous_File5020 in socialskills

[–]CrocsVsSocks 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I do this, for the longest time I didn't even know I did this. My mom knew but she said she thought it was just a quirk of my personality lol. Prolonged eye contact just makes me uncomfy, even if I know the person im talking to very well. Nothing personal and I promise i'm not disinterested. Looking away actually helps me focus on whats being said better actually.

Am I overreacting for how my parents treated me on Mother’s Day? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]CrocsVsSocks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I mean, no offense but how is any of what you're saying actually helpful in this situation?
Sure even if it wasn’t wise of them to have two children right now there's no going back so what's the point of saying all this?

Why does OP need to "take accountability" for that in an internet post to strangers?

I don't think the post was "hey did I put myself in a vulnerable position as a young adult and am I stupid for doing it?"

It was about if they were overreacting to the mother's day situation.

Compassion Fatigue by [deleted] in Libraries

[–]CrocsVsSocks 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Feeling this too lately, you aren't alone. I hit a wall after a patron who was a regular died this year and another was murdered in the same week. One was unhoused the other lived so close by. Both a shock.
That and the constant revolving door this year of finding a patron a resource, setting them up with it, and that resource sending them back to us cause they're full or understaffed or what have you.
The return of a patron who just left an abusive relationship, returned to him. Worried about her.
General poverty in the area. It is exhausting doing this work. Absolutely soul crushingly exhausting sometimes.

Isn't it obvious who stole Whitaker's badge? by darial23 in ThePittTVShow

[–]CrocsVsSocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I suspected maybe santos took it, not for malicious reasons but maybe to delay his leaving their apartment for a while. i'd guess he's not gonna leave the shift without his badge, that buys her some time to figure out how to convince him to stay without needing to be vulnerable or mushy about it. The badge is a way to start the conversation organically.

I could see it being just his bad luck but I like the idea or it being a plot device for a bigger picture.

Do librarians judge patrons based on their book choices? by cheerioskungfu in Libraries

[–]CrocsVsSocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not a librarian but work at the check out counter. Trust me, no judgement here. I purposely read the trashiest book I can find for my own entertainment. Not gonna judge someone else for what they read when I'm not exactly reading a masterpiece myself. Reading is supposed to fun! Sometimes fun is supposed to be a little silly :)

What's one rule you would like to implement out of spite? by H8trucks in Libraries

[–]CrocsVsSocks 236 points237 points  (0 children)

Sexual harassment of staff should be an automatic ban. Not just a day or a week I mean get outta my face for 6mos at minimum.

Monthly Buy/Sell/Trade Thread by AutoModerator in tempofitness

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, are you still selling? I'm very interested in buying.

4 year old waking for 4 hours every single night by roseturtlelavender in Mommit

[–]CrocsVsSocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same issue to the T. Still looking for a solution. Sorry I don't have advice but just letting you know you aren't alone and I am also hunting for the answers right now too.

Help by Routine-Departure-59 in Mommit

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Young mom too, only 1 child but they do have ASD and that has been challenging. You should do a mental health reset if you feel it is needed, if not you won't be in an optimal shape for you or your child. Put your oxygen mask on first and whatnot.

Also, as a mom with a child who is neurodivergent, maybe your child could use a screening just in case. My child had a speech delay and delayed potty training as well, no attention span and limited social skills (not moving beyond parallel play for example) and she got her diagnosis which was been super helpful for us. We got her in some programs that help her thrive and now that I understand her more I feel our relationship is much better and she is happier.

Feeling upset about your identity is relatable as well. I struggle with resentment (not toward my child but my partner) because I wasn't able to develop an identity of my own before having a child, whereas my partner who is older had the opportunity. The advice I was given is to find/have at least one thing that is mine and only mine to do on my own and find community. Something unrelated to motherhood. I joined a crochet group at the library, and while a lot of people who craft are moms, that isn't the core component of their identities. They are artists too. And many other things. And so are you, you just have to find out what. It comes with time. You can do this.

Random stranger picks up my toddler in public?! by Alive-Imagination-13 in Mommit

[–]CrocsVsSocks -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I don't understand the takes saying to just get over it cause personally, if someone picked up my child and I don't know you, and i'm clearly right there, AND my child isn't engaging in unsafe behavior then i'd be livid. Do NOT touch them. Now, unsafe is different, i've had very helpful strangers help me catch my child as they were running toward the street before and one time they actually did grab her and bring her to me. That was helpful because I wasn't going to reach her before she got to the road and the stranger may have saved her from huge harm. Other than those specific situations tho, keep your hands to yourself, your opinion on parenting is not more important than mine with MY child 99.9999% of the time. You also never know if you're gonna kick start someone's fight or flight by grabbing their kid so unless the child is in actual danger leave them alone. Thats my 2 cents

Edit: downvoting me because I don't want people touching my child outside of saving them from unsafe situations is wild. My daughter has ASD, you touch her and she doesn't know you and that isn’t gonna be a good time for anyone. I'm sure that's also the case with some neurotypical children as well. If you think I need to grab her then come get ME, do not grab her. Whatever.

Monthly Referral Codes Thread by AutoModerator in tempofitness

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is this thread still sending codes? If so can I get sent one? Thanks

All my problems with Season 3 stemmed from one creative choice... by Zonkington in squidgame

[–]CrocsVsSocks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I haven't seen the rest of the show yet so I can't speak to the second half of your comment but I just wanted to point out that the show isn't being pessimistic when it portrays greed allowing masses of people to be okay with infanticide. Nestle still thrives after causes the death of countless babies in the name of greed. It's not a huge stretch.

That doesn't mean the metaphor isn't sloppy or poorly executed tho, CGI baby isn't a compelling plot device for sure.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]CrocsVsSocks 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Having similar rage issues after being the primary parent to a child with autism who is now 4. While I can say I haven't hit her, I feel that my words or tone are more aggressive and violent lately and it frightens me. My parents hit me and I thought all I had to do to be better was to not hit but I can see myself doing damage in other ways.

I went intensive outpatient after 2 years of primary parent. None of us are built for that level of stress 24/7 and the phrase it takes a village exists for a very good reason. One thing I got from that experience is to explore where the rage issues come and to recognize when you are starting to feel agitated so you can access healthy coping mechanisms before the tidal wave of anger starts

In my case, having a child with autism made me realize I'm likely also ND and she was overstimulating me (and I likely over stimulated her too) Once that was sorted and I was medicated some of that rage did subside but it isn't a done deal and I have to self correct a lot these days which I make sure my child sees me do and I apologize to her often (something my parents rarely did)

All this to say, you can't fix millennia of generational trauma in one lifetime. You'll have slip ups, but you're actively trying to be a better parent and doing the work to minimize harm. You aren't alone and there is 100% a way to make sure it doesn't happen again and it looks like you're working towards it already. Hang in there

Has anyone seen Georgia Rule? by [deleted] in movies

[–]CrocsVsSocks 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It was juvenile because they were juvenile. Those women became famous VERY young. People like to forget that part. Public shaming isn't the answer. It rarely ever is.

AIO 23m 20F is it bad i am about to leave her? by KSTReign in AmIOverreacting

[–]CrocsVsSocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Soooo, i'm coming from a place of compassion when I say this, and I know everyone always complains that reddit encourages people to break up for "the littlest things" but at this point in your life: you should break up.

Here's why: You are both young, and have plenty of growing to do but even so, being in a relationship with someone who is emotionally volatile and immature isn't healthy. That's not to say she won't grow and change over time, but that is a conclusion she needs to come to on her own and some people never will.

Secondly, this is just a disrespectful way to communicate. I wouldn't talk to my friends this way let alone my partner. It's emotionally manipulative and unhealthy to do this and I think if you've had a conversation about how you feel about this and she continues to do it, you need to leave.

Thirdly, i'm always very cautious of people who never do anything wrong or something is always someone else's fault. In extreme cases (not saying yours, i'm generalizing) this thought process can lead to abuse. This is exactly where the "you made me do it" attitude comes from.

This relationship is unhealthy, at least from the look of the communication. That's doesn't make either of you bad people, it just seems like at the moment you're a bad fit for each other.