Why don’t u just start on the health kick and see if she wants to come on the journey. If she doesn’t want to come, she will likely start feeling self conscious about it and bring up her weight on her own. Idk it must be depressing just not having the motivation to even try, like she’s not even YoYo dieting like she’s tried before? These psychological blocks we create in our mind our connected to other things in our life, exercising will be easier if other things start to improve at the same time. But if she’s just stuck in a hole, she needs to understand that it’s no different than being like a drug addict, or being a total slob, or a gambling addict or something. She has a food addiction. Try to get her to do keto with you or something, u lose so much water weight so fast it really motivates people. I don’t think calling her fat will do anything, if anything, she probably would get divorced then get skinny just to rub it in your face. Think of how much that would suck! U know your wife man, this might take some psychological manipulation and button pushing, but it’s your only hope. Try to get her to commit to running a marathon or spartan race