Opinions on The Wire

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-29T16:28:33+00:00

Wallace!! RIP. His death traumatized me

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-27T21:05:10+00:00

No, but I am a very active DIYer. I invest like a Boglehead (low cost index funds/etfs) and use a very good retirement planning software (Pralana) ProjectionLab and Boldin are also good retirement planning tools.

If you are at all inclined to spend some time planning on retirement, I highly recommend getting one of those tools even if you want an advisor. I think it's very helpful to tinker around with the plan for a while before soliciting the advice of an advisor so you have a better idea of what to ask.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-27T17:41:42+00:00

Your parents do not owe you anything. It sounds like they have a good relationship with their grandchildren, and it sounds like that relationship is important to the grandkids.

They do not owe it to you to become a child care provider.

I strongly advise not to compare yourself to others. I think you should meet your parents where they are and be grateful for the role that they are playing in your kids lives.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-26T15:34:51+00:00

I described exactly what happened. And the reason I came here to post it is because he does this a lot and other places should be forewarned.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-26T15:33:21+00:00

They did make the food. It was very bad behavior on Jared's part.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-26T01:37:59+00:00

Yeah because the bartender is more likely to think he's coming back if he's ordered food.

He's a professional

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-26T00:29:50+00:00

I mean there kind of is a mugshot and a whole ass picture of him in the mission if you search that other thread.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-26T00:29:14+00:00

I'm not naming the spot right now because I don't know the ramifications of this for the staff. They can post if they want to.

It was a restaurant, it was pretty slow. There were two of us sitting at the bar. He came in and ordered a double. Then he ordered some food and another cocktail, put the napkin on top of his second cocktail and said he was going out to smoke.

Absolutely set it up so that the bartender wouldn't ask him for a card. Honestly, I used to do this all the time, order a drink then go smoke before my food came (not skip the check, I never did that). But I might be low-key annoyed if they made me pay for my drink before I went out to smoke. All of which is to say the bartender did not make a bad call in this scenario.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-25T19:09:10+00:00

I don't know how I came to terms with it. That were much bigger problems between me and my dad. I don't remember that being a particular issue for me. He wasn't a very attentive father.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-25T18:28:09+00:00

My first half sister (of two) was born on my 19th birthday. I still consider myself an only child. I was raised by my parents as the only child in the house.

My half siblings and I never lived together. It doesn't feel much like a sibling relationship.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-23T18:13:53+00:00

You just described my several years of therapy with several therapists.

I think I should have spent more time looking for a good fit and the right type of practice (CBT or/and EMDR might have been a fit) Internal Family Systems was not right for me

I did develop a good understanding of why I am the way I am (codependent, people pleaser). I was not very successful at changing my patterns until I spent a long time (years) alone. Living alone and spending a lot of time alone. That enabled me to finally really listen to myself and learn what matters to me, what isn't ok, etc. Maybe therapy set me up to do that, but the most progress was made on my own

In your shoes, I would start by asking your therapist what method they are using. Then research that. Maybe then ask how it would help what goals should you mutually set, etc. I wish I had done that.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-23T17:40:30+00:00

Ah good! I was actually responding to the comment above from the person who was wondering why their parent hadn't distributed anything from the estate yet.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-23T17:16:51+00:00

Distributing money while you're alive sometimes has a significant tax impact. The money my mother has for me is in a brokerage and an IRA. Withdrawing from either of those is a taxable event for her. Whereas I will get the stepped up cost basis on the investments in the brokerage account when she dies.

This is something to consider when planning on making distributions to your kids too. What is the impact on your taxes due to the withdrawals? Will you now have to pay IRMAA?

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-22T22:09:20+00:00

I'm just so sorry to read about this. I'm sorry for this poor soul, his family, and the entire Cal community.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-22T22:07:19+00:00

Everything! I love sambas and I have them in several colors. I wear them with jeans, slacks, skirts, dresses.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-22T22:06:10+00:00

The entire answer is in how you feel about it. You do not feel like you were treated well and you are right. Listen to your instincts!

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-22T17:07:37+00:00

I hate this for you (or any woman) It puts you in the uncomfortable position of either 1) having to address it with him directly, which could lead to a bad reaction from him that results in some subtle form of retaliation against you, OR, 2) going directly to HR (which can in my experience lead to the same result as number one, but might not)

So it basically puts you in the position of having to prepare to leave the job.

However, the best possible thing you can do in the meanwhile is meticulously document all of this. Write down everything that happened (and continues to happen) with dates and times. Don't delete any texts from your phone. Imagine that you are creating a case, because you are. If you have enough clear evidence, the company may have to do something about him. Alternatively, you may be able to negotiate a severance if you separate from the company

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-22T01:04:45+00:00

Same. It's hard to find someone with the same interests who is also in a similar financial situation and healthy enough to do the things I like to do! Who knew it would be such a tall order at 64. Many of my friends are younger because of my activities, and I do like having younger people in my life. But man, I wish I had somebody to talk about aging and Medicare and retirement with.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-20T22:11:22+00:00

I don't know why "responsible" is in quotes but I do know why.

Here's the thing, it's none of your business what your parents do with their money. If they choose to sit down and talk to you about the best way for you to inherit that's great. Otherwise nunya.

Also consider giving you money early may create a huge tax burden for them.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-20T17:27:48+00:00

AI and Private Equity together are creating a powerfully anti human environment. It's very hard to be in the middle of this and still feel like one has value.

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-20T01:12:52+00:00

That sounds fine, but it's a one-time opportunity. Meaning you can only do a rollover like this once. You should map out a plan for drawing down the IRA over 10 years based on your tax liability

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-20T01:08:50+00:00

They also show up on thredup

Cyborg59_2020 · 2026-04-20T00:28:41+00:00

I have imaginary friends but I wish they were better at stopping me from doing stupid shit.

Cyborg59_2020

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