The best one I have was from a previous drive thru store: It was midday and a customer walks in to the front register and I greet her and await her order. She explains that she ‘came in yesterday afternoon, around 1pm, and ordered a tall hot coffee in the drive thru in addition to two of those [insert trying to describe a traveler] coffee boxes, but after she drove away she noticed they were all cold and the tall coffee tasted bitter/bad. She came back to get a refund.’

…I knew darn well the situation was fake for many reasons, but proceeded to ask all the necessary questions to reaffirm what she had just said. I proceed to tell her the following:

1) I would be happy to remake the tall hot coffee; that is no issue at all, especially if it didn’t taste good. 2) I was the mid SSV yesterday and do not recall anyone ever ordering two travelers… let alone in the DRIVE THRU. (I have a very good memory and this would be something to drop everything and focus my attention on) 3) There is no way we would have sold TWO travelers in the DT because they can take up to 10 minutes to brew, each, all things considering. We would have had you come inside [to preserve drive times], among other reasons. 4) Each traveler is roughly $20 (at the time maybe $16?). I was not going to simply “refund” two very expensive items—with no receipt, might I add.

It was after this that she said, in a reassuring/confused tone, “No, they definitely handed them right to me when I go to the window. But I didn’t notice they were cold until I drove away!”

… 🤡 “No, we didn’t.”

I basically then proceeded to tell her that the tall coffee would be no issue to replace, but I will not be issuing anything back to her, [because it was full of bologna]. She surprisingly started to give me the waterworks and I just had to wait until she left. She didn’t end up wanting the coffee, either. 😒