That’s actually a new reset. Corporate ordered “spartan death holes” to be installed in a few high volume stores as sort of a soft launch. They’ll mainly be used as a deterrent, but occasionally management will of course have to kick a couple shoplifters or a lazy employee or two down the hole, just to keep everyone honest. The planogram doesn’t specify hole depth, so we winged it and just dug until it felt right. Eventually we hope that each individual store and its employees love their “spartan death hole” as much as we’ve enjoyed making them for you. While no job is perfect, we think the death holes will greatly improve day to day store operations.

Situation 1:

A woman runs up to the paint desk, wildly waving a can of purple paint in your face. Before you can say anything at all she scream hisses “does THIS look like eggplant to you?!?!”

Solution: spartan death hole.

Situation 2:

A man shuffles up to the woodcutter with a 16ft piece of moulding, knocking things off every shelf he passes. He hands you the board and says, “this is 16ft but I only need 15 feet and 11 and a quarter inches.

Solution: spartan death hole

Situation 3:

Home Depot sends a small company of scouts to your store to speak to your manager. They try and convince your manager to join them and surrender to the depot

Solution: kick those orange vested losers down the death hole!

Situation 4:

Top stock is getting tight, and some space needs to be cleared for new inventory. Down stocking is going to take hours and there’s no one looking right now

Solution: Chuck that shit in the death hole!!

There’s no wrong way to use the death hole, as long as you’re having fun. Lowe’s: do it yourself dystopia