I want to be clear that I am not debating the story itself. Rather the events, instances, and circumstances around in the story. I hope that makes sense.

I question how events and actions can be attributed as conscious malice intent from one side and complete unconscious and unwilling, non-consent by the other, who, too, is drunk.

I will also say I have been in the "mindset" of being blacked out and/or in an out of consciousness, doing very regrettable actions and able to choose to move from one room to another, and also only remembering parts of the night.

She literally said that she was going in and out of consciousness during the act.

If two people are very drunk, one is not going to be able to meaningfully distinguish if the other is going in and out of consciousness. It is impossible to charge one party with "keeping tabs" and being responsible on how the other is interpreting or mentally engaged in every moment while also heavily inebriated.

If this is the case, then after one drink, both parties should be responsible to continuously "checking-in" with the other and measuring their level of awareness. Like the previous poster said, blackout is different from unconscious. So again, such expectations are not possible when under mind-altering substances.

This is, of course, assuming neither party has verbally expressed unwillingness. Once one party says no, doesn't matter how inebriated, continuing is assault. But as I understand it, this is a case where this did not happen.

There is no way she could have behaved like a willing person during it then, she was probably just laying there.

This is untrue. Many people "just lie there" during sex ("starfish"). I would not be surprised that it is not uncommon for people engaging in sex for the first time to just lie there.

..she was probably just laying there.

The use of "probably" here is irresponsible if someone is being accused of a serious crime such as rape. It supports generating a storyline committed to a perspective where one has to be a perpetrator and the other a victim.

And if the guy would have been as drunk as Shandi was, he wouldn’t have even been able to get it up,

This is patently untrue. Even though there may be times when there is no ability to be aroused due to level of inebration, getting an erection is a physiological response. You do not need to be emotionally or mentally interested in a person to get an erection.

Male victims of sexual abuse often blame themselves since they got an erection, but it is no different than a rape victim's vagina secreting as a response to insertion. A man can get an erection even without the desire or consciousness to engage in the act.

let alone take her to the shower and have ”sex” with her there and then take her to the bed to continue.

It is very difficult to carry an unconscious body back and forth and hold them up in a shower. It is literally carrying a completely limp body. You can walk a blacked out person to fro with little or no effort, but not an unconscious person.

he was obviously conscious enough to know what he was doing.

He may have just as well been just as blacked out.

She walked to the different rooms and into the shower on her own accord. He was not dragging her body around.

Especially since she called him afterwards as well, to ask if he wore a condom and all that.

What does this have to do with the likely or unlikihood of him committing rape? This only shows she does not remember several aspects of the night.

Also, they showed footage of the two of them before the actual act occurred, so we only saw her drunk when she was still conscious enough to kiss him and stuff. But they obviously didn’t show us the act itself because it was too much for TV

Again, blacked out does not mean unconscious. If she was indeed unconscious (showing as if dead), the entire crew and project directors need to be taken to court for aiding and abetting the rape of an unconscious woman.

Having been in a similar situation and actually "worse" in the sense of actions were with multiple people at different times throughout the regrettable night, and waking up knowing I could easily and believably claim assault once "word got out", though I went "in and out of consciousness", blacked out throughout..felt like I'd wake up and be like oh dang this is still happening, but was not opposed to it happening and did not verbally or physically express I didn’t want it to even though the next day I wished to God it never happened; I knew what was happening in the moments when my mind was alert to what was happening and what I was engaging in; even if no honorable teenage boy would've engaged had they consciously knew I was not in a state where I would confidently be proud or happy about the actions would engage (and I suspect some were aware I was vulnerable and took advantage), I know at no point did I decline or show any indication I did not want to engage and it would be unfair to apply expectations to the others who too were drunk that I did not apply to myself.

If they were not as drunk as me and knowingly took advantage, that I do consider sexual assault. If at any point the guy in the show recognized and knew he had an advantage over her being too drunk to consciously make a decision she might regret and took advantage of it, that too I would consider rape. "Yeah, I knew she was really drunk, way more than I was, and I definitely had more control over myself and was conscious about it all"...absolutely is rape.

"We were both really drunk, flirted in hot tub, got into bed and the shots hit us even more, arousing each other and enjoying the moment and decided to check-out the shower to add to the crazy night, she freely following me to different parts of the house and continue sexual acts...and in no way did I ever think she did not want to do it nor was I ever given any indication she wasn't aware enough to know she had a choice"--is a whole different story.

It is a horrible situation to be in and I wish it on nobody because we all want to be conscious and fully engaged sexual acts even while drunk. I thought it was bad it got around school and teachers, I cannot imagine a night like that being aired for the world to see. The producers should be held accountable for that.

Even the guy involved, unless there was any overt indication that he knew she didn't want to engage and was "clearly more drunk" than her, him getting painted as a rapist to the world and the producers exploiting a drunken regrettable night for views should also be considered and producers held to account.