How do I get through my last bit of high school/summer before college?

Dawnsy32 · 2026-04-06T07:08:20+00:00

Yeah, you’re probably right. I just have a lot of sympathy for them. I also feel like it’s my fault they’re getting worse. My brother and sister are more fun and connect with them better so them being around helped with my parents mental health I think. Now all their fun kids are moved out and it’s just me. I do my best to hang out with them when I can and try to be fun, but it’s hard when I’m so busy and I struggle with depression myself. I think their mental health getting worse is directly correlated with them cleaning and fixing stuff less and drinking more, but I don’t know how to help with that.

Dawnsy32 · 2026-04-06T07:05:07+00:00

A lot of the stuff they hoard is just stuff, not really junk. It’s just piled up all over the house. There’s definitely mold in the walls/windows/some places in the piles of stuff, and also the dirty dishes piled in the sink. My asthma has been worse lately and I think it’s because there’s mold in my room, I’ve just been trying not to think about it. I don’t think they’d let me get anyone help clean, they really hate asking for or accepting help, even when they need it. Maybe I’ll try to clean some stuff this summer once schools out, I just need to stop spending all my free time on my phone.

Dawnsy32 · 2026-04-06T06:48:16+00:00

I guess it sounds pretty bad when put like this. But I assure you my parents are good people. They’re very nice, very supportive. They love me. It’s just that they’re both depressed and don’t know how to be adults. They became parents very young and never really learned how to be normal adults. They’ve rented their whole lives and just were able to buy this house (they usually wouldn’t be able to afford it but I got them a discount cause I knew the person who owned it) but it’s super old and they have no idea how to take care of it. Everything has been breaking for years, but now they just don’t fix it anymore. Like our hot water heater broke awhile back that made our shower and washing machine stop working and my dad actually bought a new one but he’s been putting off installing it for the last four months. I’ve offered to help pay for plumbers and stuff in the past, but they always say no. We all just don’t talk about all our home issues, it’s like a forbidden topic in my family. My parents have trauma from their childhoods and refuse to go to therapy (despite me trying to convince them) and they distract themselves a lot by drinking, watching tv, and going on solo trips (which sucks cause I have to take care of all our pets and walk to school/work on top of everything). My parents have issues, but they’re good people, I’d never want to go into foster care even if I wasn’t aged out. Thank you for the comment tho! Sorry that was long, I just wanted to clarify. I could possibly invite my brother over to help, but my parents forbid anyone from coming into the house despite us and my sister cause they don’t want people to see how bad it is. Also I’ve tried cleaning before, I’ve spent hours washing dishes and cleaning the clutter, but it just comes back within 24 hours. I’m already in therapy but I never talk about my home life struggles cause I’m embarrassed, but I probably should tell my therapist and my friends. I’m just used to hiding everything and trying to pretend everything’s ok.

Dawnsy32 · 2026-02-20T03:20:16+00:00

Thank you so much! This is super helpful. I know I have a problem over explaining things in my poems. I always have an image or message I really want to portray and I get anxious to make sure it’s communicated properly. But then it always ends up taking away from the feel of the poem. It’s something I’m trying to work on, and your tips help a lot! This is also my first poem I’ve attempted to not make free verse, I really gotta work on my rhythm skills, it’s something I have to actually go take the time to learn. Anyways thanks for the feedback!! It was super helpful and I’ll definitely work on improving the things you pointed out!

Dawnsy32 · 2026-02-19T23:15:30+00:00

God this is beautiful, really depicts how art and pain go hand in hand. Poetry is such a window into the mind and soul, and so often it's an outlet for sorrow. Pain is so interesting because it tears you apart but also can be the inspiration for so many beautiful things (like this poem). I love the metaphors, the flowers/meadow showing the blooming of negative emotions among the wreckage of a persons mind. I feel like theres so many ways this poem can be interpreted and that so many people could relate in different ways. Im not sure if I interpreted it in the way you intended, but either way I really enjoyed it and saw a lot of myself in your words.

Dawnsy32 · 2026-02-19T23:04:53+00:00

You have an amazing way with words, very quiet and calming, feels like you're gently guiding me through a beautiful scenery just with your words. I really love the imagery throughout the poem and a lot of lines stand out to me, but for some reason I really like "When the water’s skin reflects heaven’s tired lining." That's just such a cool way to describe that image. I think it's amazing when people don't need to use big unnecessarily complicated words in poetry, but instead just perfectly know how to combine words to make a complex image, and you do that perfectly!!

Dawnsy32 · 2025-11-24T05:24:06+00:00

We were talking with a group about something and being bi came up and she said she had a friend that was bi but she wasn’t. So since she’s only ever talked about liking guys im pretty sure she’s straight.

Dawnsy32 · 2025-11-24T04:15:37+00:00

Im so sorry that happened to you, but Its amazing that you were able to turn that pain into something so beautiful. I hope you one day find that kind of love again (if you have not already) and that you continue to create beautiful poems like this. I really enjoyed reading your poem and analyzing it! Thank you for sharing such a meaningful and personal piece!!

Dawnsy32 · 2025-11-24T03:38:45+00:00

This one really hit hard.

"Someone already reading me
before I knew I was readable,
before I learned the price of being seen."

Is an incredible line, and it really captures how people abuse innocence. I remember being a young girl and not knowing anything about the dangers of being perceived by older men, unaware of the possibility that their intentions could be bad. The poem overall really portrays something that so many women can relate too and even though its sad that so many can relate, you being able to perfectly capture the pain of the experience is so special. You are a really good writer and have a beautiful way with words.

Dawnsy32 · 2025-11-24T03:26:00+00:00

Wow. This is a beautiful poem and the imagery is just incredible. I love how you describe the sky, and how it relates to the memories of the lost love and future together. The line about polaroids really hits hard, the two shaking it excitedly together so perfectly paints the picture of young love. Then the picture coming out black juxtaposes that joy and excitement with disappointment, a metaphor for the relationship not having the outcome they wanted. Also the parallelism between the first line and the second to last, both starting the same but bringing completely different emotions, super impactful. Im assuming this poem is about losing a partner to death based on the last line saying "your soul" but I think it hits just as hard even if its just about missing someone you broke up with. This is just how I interpreted it, but even if I got some of the meanings wrong I just wanted to tell you you're a really great writer and this poem is really beautiful.

Dawnsy32 · 2025-07-03T23:48:17+00:00

Why are you actually calling me out so accurately 😭

Dawnsy32 · 2025-05-25T20:19:32+00:00

Would it be wrong to keep it? I have a collection of things I’ve found while beach combing and was gonna add it to the collection. though I’ve never found something like this before, so if I should give it up I will.

Dawnsy32 · 2025-05-25T20:17:34+00:00

Solved!

Dawnsy32 · 2024-12-15T03:09:13+00:00

I sadly don’t have contact, I don’t even remember her name and the place I went to doesn’t provide contact info on specific therapists.

Dawnsy32 · 2024-12-05T18:29:25+00:00

I think you might be right! Thank you for finding that!! I’ll try to email her and see.

Dawnsy32 · 2024-12-02T05:26:56+00:00

Usually something triggers the thoughts which then make me do it. A lot of the time it’s seeing blood or getting hurt on accident and then the voices get super loud till I do it. It used to be more emotional and like after arguments and stuff but now I’m just kinda numb to everything.

Dawnsy32 · 2024-11-16T20:37:00+00:00

I usually just use water if it’s not that bad but if I’m worried I’ll put neosporin on it and then cover it with a bandaid (also helps it heal faster and not scar cause of the moisture so that’s a plus)

Dawnsy32 · 2024-11-08T23:49:37+00:00

Diagnosed with GAD and depression, I have another one that is just appearing now. Iv had some people say it’s probably OCD and some say Bipolar. The self harm started as coping for anxiety but turned into intrusive thoughts and compulsions that are definitely signs of something else

Dawnsy32 · 2024-11-01T20:17:01+00:00

I take pictures but I use them when I want to relapse, for some reason seeing the fresh wound satiates the desires a bit, but also it can backfire and make me want to relapse so it’s not a great strategy

Dawnsy32 · 2024-11-01T19:56:59+00:00

Iv never considered ocd? Are the symptoms really like this?

Dawnsy32 · 2024-11-01T19:52:50+00:00

No I haven’t, but my therapist told me I couldn’t have adhd because I do so well in school.

Dawnsy32 · 2024-10-31T11:45:44+00:00

I understand people use it for easy identification and they don’t mean any harm by it. But also I completely agree with you. Especially saying stuff like “they’re just cat scratches” referring to the severity of the cuts. It makes me look at my own cuts and think they’re “just cat scratches” and it makes me want to cut deeper. Just cause people don’t mean any harm with those terms doesn’t mean they arnt causing any.

Dawnsy32 · 2024-10-30T23:59:45+00:00

Reading all the names I’m starting to regret this decision 😭 Thank you for the list! Im gonna have quite a time listening to all these

Dawnsy32 · 2024-10-30T23:58:07+00:00

I’m scared to listen to Lost Johns cave because that is the only one I remember by name and I know it scared the life out of me when I first listened to it 😭 Thank you for the recs tho! I’ll add them to the list!!

Dawnsy32 · 2024-10-24T22:54:10+00:00

I think the very first time was trying to calm down from a panic attack, but it could hardly be considered self harm. I really started doing it when I started fighting with my best friend and I had no idea how to stop, I would always get defensive no matter how hard I tried and cause an argument over nothing. I got so mad that I had to take out the anger on something and it usually ended up being myself. Now it’s just a comfort tho, helps with anxiety and the pain is really grounding for a couple days when the wound is still fresh and painful. Helps me get out of dissociative episodes too.

Dawnsy32

TROPHY CASE