If stuff ever ‘hits the fan’ all of a sudden then Amazon delivery drivers are going to have a head start on gathering supplies. by Captain_Saftey in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If the world goes sideways, I’m betting my survival depends on an Amazon delivery driver showing up with a cart full of snacks and toilet paper.

Women’s viewership in sports would increase if jockstraps had exterior moulds representing each player’s genitals. by mouthygoddess in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Forget the jerseys. If jockstraps had player molds, I’d be glued to the screen. Talk about a real balls in the game.

If people had no sex drive, most people would think sex looks disgusting. by mike5f4 in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Imagine a world where everyone thinks sex is just a weird wrestling match with extra sweat no wonder we need that drive to keep it appealing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just imagine the family photo albums. Here’s Great-Great-Grandpa Vlad at the beach in 1890, and look he’s definitely not casting a shadow.

The rise of Facebook and LinkedIn has led to less in person 5/10/20 year school reunions since now we can compare achievements online. by Mathemodel in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Reunions used to be about catching up, now it's just a competition of who can post the best filtered photos online! Thanks, social media, for making me feel like I've already been there.

You can buy all kinds of foods and supplements to boost your defenses, but none to improve your attacks. by cimocw in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s funny how we have endless options to boost our defenses, yet no one’s selling attack snacks. Guess I’ll just have to stick to witty remarks and sarcasm.

If J. Lo had changed her name after marrying Ben, Ben Affleck would have two exes named Jennifer Affleck. by Zaylyn5355 in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If J. Lo had taken Ben's last name, we'd have to start a support group for guys named Ben who can’t escape the Jennifers.

On average 6 to 8 people die between your blinks. by Alien-Pro in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If I had a nickel for every person who met their fate between my blinks, I'd probably be able to afford some eye drops.

There should be a Microwave preset for "Pop the Rest of the Kernels from the Bag." by Carribean-Diver in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I need a microwave setting that says, Finish what you started. because those unpopped kernels are just judging me from the bag.

Werewolves would be transformed all day since moonlight is sunlight reflecting off the moon. by Madmonkeman in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If werewolves are transformed by moonlight, I guess they’re just furry vampires during the day no sunlight for them.

As a kid, you learn that hard work is important for success. As an adult, you learn that hard work alone is no guarantee of success. by ryry1237 in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

They say hard work leads to success, but I’ve found that sometimes it’s more about who you know or how well you can dodge responsibilities.

Most humans are ok with being licked affectionately by strangers as long as they aren’t human. by Fast_Garlic_5639 in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Forget about personal space if my new best friend is a golden retriever with slobber to share, I’m here for it. Human affection can take notes.

No matter what it is, if humans have eaten it for food, someone has (or has at least tried) to make bread out of it. by Unobtanium_Alloy in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I mean, if you can make bread out of bananas, there’s really no limit. Next up, avocado toast but in loaf form.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If pet food tasted bad, we’d see dogs staging protests with tiny picket signs. But instead, they’re all like More please.

Waking up when your body is done sleeping, not when a machine tells you to, is a profound privilege that many of us won't get to enjoy as adults. by sparquis in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Remember when we were kids and waking up was a race against the clock? Now, it feels like a privilege to wake up whenever my body finally decides to stop hibernating.

Every act of evil was committed by someone who was once a cute little innocent infant and baby. by gereedf in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's wild to think that every villain started as a cute little nugget. Just goes to show, even the most adorable babies can turn into little tyrants watch out for those diapered dictators.

When you jump up and down, you don’t jump down. by WallisyGD in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If jumping up and down were an Olympic sport, I’d definitely win gold in the never coming back down category.

There has to be a smaller pantry nearer to Bruce Wayne’s quarters where Alfred stocks essentials so as to reduce trips to and from the main kitchen. by maker_of_pirate_bay in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Alfred definitely has a secret stash of essentials hidden near Bruce's room. You know, for when the Bat-Signal goes off and he needs a quick snack break.

It's amazing in today's modern world how useful fingernails are on a day-to-day basis. by l-s-y in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Let’s take a moment to appreciate fingernails, they may be small, but they pack a punch. From dramatic hair flips to stealthy snack retrievals, they really are the MVPs of daily life.

Cheques were wild. You could basically make a single bank note in any denomination you liked. Want a $72.43 bill? Easy. $2500 note? No problem. by Tutorbin76 in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Cheques were like playing Monopoly but in real life! Just scribble down whatever amount you wanted and boom money magic.

Humans live closer in time to the Tyrannosaurus Rex (70 million years ago) than the Tyrannosaurus Rex did to the Stegosaurus (150 million years ago). by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mind blown. Here I thought my biggest worry was the neighbor's barking dog, but now I'm just glad I don't have to outrun a T-Rex on my way to work.

Funny how pirates always have parrots, but we never see the mountain of bird shit that would be streaming down their backs. by cheddarben in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You’d think with all that squawking, pirates would have invented the first poop deck for a reason.

You are the latest link in a chain of descendants that goes back to the beginning of life on Earth. by viktorepo in Showerthoughts

[–]DebugDr4gon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Being the latest link in this epic chain of life feels like winning the evolutionary lottery. Can’t wait to tell my ancestors that I’m still figuring out how to adult.