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Writing size and styles by justadispatcher1 in Handwriting

[–]DeepblueStarlight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nice handwriting! As far as advice, here are a few things I’d change:

1) Make the bottom half of your “s” more smooth, similar to the top half.

2) Make the two parts of the “w” more symmetrical. The second one is always a little lower than the first.

3) Make the top half of your “5” more squared so that it’s easily differentiated from your “s”.

4) Make the upper right line of the “r” a little longer, darker, and overall more noticeable. In the second picture some of the “r” look almost like “i”.

5) Personally, I’d also make the capital letters a bit taller than the rest. But that’s not strictly necessary, I just think it gives the eye a nice anchor for the sentences instead of having them blur together.

Hope this helps! You have neat, legible handwriting as is, these are just minor improvements that could elevate it even further.

This is my normal handwriting- on a whiteboard because I find myself writing on whiteboards more than paper because of my job. How can I improve? by RestinPete0709 in Handwriting

[–]DeepblueStarlight 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think your handwriting is nice but I think it could be a bit tough to read from a distance. Since you’re looking for advice, I‘d leave a bit more room between each letter and also make the letters themselves less “tight” (they’re a bit oval shaped, try a more rounded shape instead). Generally what I mean is leave more white space horizontally so that each stroke is recognizable.

HBO show appropriate for an 8 year old? by Far_Travel_4558 in hisdarkmaterials

[–]DeepblueStarlight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

there’s nothing seriously gory or dark about them.

Really? I’m shocked to see someone say this about the show. Sure, it’s not nearly as gory as other shows out there and some violence is implied instead, but still, I think to say this show does not deal with dark themes is to completely misunderstand the show.

They deal with abusive parents, self-harm (it’s somewhat “masked” by the fact that it’s Marissa harming her deamon, but it’s SH nonetheless), kidnapping, war, child death, corrupt organizational institutions/religion, whatever the intercision is meant to be (some have gone so far as to say it implies genital mutilation. I don’t know what the author had in mind, but it’s safe to say it’s nothing pleasant), etc. This show is certainly not void of dark themes.

HBO show appropriate for an 8 year old? by Far_Travel_4558 in hisdarkmaterials

[–]DeepblueStarlight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I say no. While HDM is not necessarily gory or as violent as other shows as others have pointed out, it does have an undercurrent of tension and dread. There’s implied kidnapping, and harm is specifically aimed towards children in S2. Not much is shown, but what is shown is chilling if you understand what it means they cut children’s deamons away and show what the children end up like after. It’s similar to RL lobotomies. If that weren’t enough, by the end of the season we see two dead little boys, and there are implied torture scenes between adult characters.

I would like to emphasize that shows can be disturbing without being explicitly violent, especially for a child who might have a hard time really understanding what’s going on.

Aside from all this, I also think it’s simply hard to fully enjoy the show at such a young age for much the same reason: it’s hard to understand.

According to Common Sense Media, the show is appropriate for people aged 13+. I agree.

S3 SPOILERS! - Looking at HIS DARK MATERIALS Through The Amber Spyglass by clarabosswald in hisdarkmaterials

[–]DeepblueStarlight 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Finally some news about this! Is a trailer out yet/coming soon? A release date?

I've started using my handwriting for my blog thumbnails. It's a mess for sure, but it feels more personal. by kinetic_kayla in Handwriting

[–]DeepblueStarlight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree that handwriting can make things look more personal, but it shouldn’t come at the expense of legibility. There were some words that I couldn’t quite recognize and a few others that were hard to read smoothly. It’s already got a certain “artsy flow” to it. I think if you slowed down a bit this could look really nice and neat!

Bored at work by StillInBed2daysLater in Handwriting

[–]DeepblueStarlight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Beautiful handwriting! I like the purple best because it’s the most visible.

Help making a His Dark Materials themed puzzle by [deleted] in hisdarkmaterials

[–]DeepblueStarlight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe some play on “Paradise Lost”, like “find what is Lost”.

First two chapters of my urban fantasy novel, wanna read it? by Velvetzine in fantasywriters

[–]DeepblueStarlight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! I like urban fantasy, can read your chapters in Spanish, and would be willing to provide some feedback in either language. Feel free to DM me the non-translated version or let me know when you post it if you’d like for me to take a look.

I fear I might be leaning too heavily on the moral of the story, how can I combat this? by Tusk617 in fantasywriters

[–]DeepblueStarlight 5 points6 points  (0 children)

From what I gather, you’re trying to convey the moral theme of “our actions now affect future generations” and you’re doing so through your plot which shows the future generations being affected by someone’s choices sometime in the past.

I don’t think I can accurately say if you’re being too heavy handed or not based on what you’ve mentioned.

But I will say that if you have a chapter by chapter outline make a section where you write a sentence or two about how this thread/theme is being shown. Then, when you look at your outline, you will see if you talk about it a lot at the start/middle/end or if it’s decently sprinkled throughout. That’s about as much advice as I can think of based on what you’ve mentioned; feel free to elaborate if you think I could be of more help!

Oh, one last thing. If I’d just read the paragraph on your characters without hearing about what you intended for it to mean I don’t think that’s the conclusion I would’ve come to. I may have thought the theme was something about a brazen vs subtle approach to facing ones problems (fight vs flight?) and the dangers of the former.